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Things I can cross off from my pre-children "Things I would never do as a parent" list

(67 Posts)
BellaBearisWideAwake Mon 16-May-11 17:11:25

1. Dress my children in branded clothing

(with a big shout out to H&M for selling clothes with Lightning McQueen, thank you)

Avantia Mon 16-May-11 17:25:21

Take them to McDonalds

BellaBearisWideAwake Mon 16-May-11 17:27:02

2. Eat ketchup with everything. blush

RainbowShite Mon 16-May-11 17:27:39

Stick them in front of the tv to get some peace.

Needanewname Mon 16-May-11 17:27:55

say

'don't talk to me in that tone of voice'
' don't slam the door'
'because I said so!!!!!!!!' in a very exasperated voice
'ask daddy'

though I am proud to say I have never wiped their faces with a licked tissue grin

SilveryMoon Mon 16-May-11 17:28:52

Say very loudly "Go to your room!"

Sirzy Mon 16-May-11 17:29:08

Allow childrens tv

Allow him to eat chocolate

AlwaysbeOpralFruitstome Mon 16-May-11 17:29:32

Use the phrase "Because I said so!"

AlwaysbeOpralFruitstome Mon 16-May-11 17:30:45

Needanewname beat me to it, damn!

...and I've licked a tissue to wipe their faces. Double fail.

Needanewname Mon 16-May-11 17:31:27

grin

MollyMurphy Mon 16-May-11 17:32:01

Have all those bloody toys in the living room

Clarabumps Mon 16-May-11 17:49:54

All of the above.x

Rosemallow Mon 16-May-11 17:55:01

Watch tv
Eat chocolate/crisps/any other junk
Sleep in my bed
Give in to whinging for magazine/toy/other while traipsing round the supermarket
Not follow through with a threat of discipline
Buy shoes for a child who cannot walk (they look cute!)
Oh dear, this list is rather lengthy . . .

Lorelai Mon 16-May-11 17:55:32

Push an empty buggy around a shopping centre - well not empty - no child in it, but lots of shopping hanging off the back.

ohfuckohfuckohfuckduck Mon 16-May-11 17:55:36

Do you really think you're going out dressed like that?

What time of night do you call this to come home?

Is this a fucking hotel?

Am I a taxi service?

Lorelai Mon 16-May-11 17:56:28

Oh, forgot give a toddler a bit of bread to eat in the supermarket trolley

aStarInStrangeways Mon 16-May-11 17:58:22

"I want never gets."

Bonsoir Mon 16-May-11 17:58:26

Nutella straight from the pot with a teaspoon.

BellaBearisWideAwake Mon 16-May-11 18:03:13

Oh yes, "DS do you want a chocolate sandwich?"

sleeplessinderbyshire Mon 16-May-11 18:04:16

give them chocolate and quavers because it's the only thing they'll actually eat

BrokenBananaTantrum Mon 16-May-11 18:04:25

Allow plastic tat toys especially ones that make noise.
And most of the above blush

pinklaydee Mon 16-May-11 18:07:18

Dummies.
Toys all over the garden.
Kids coming into our bed at night.
Using bribery.

SummerRain Mon 16-May-11 18:09:27

'Eyes bigger than tummy'
'Do you know how much that cost?'
'Because I said so and this is my house so my rules go'
'Stop jumping on the furniture'
'Just taste it... you can't decide you don't like it based on how it looks' (doubly blush as I was the pickiest eater alive as a child and regularly decided something was horrible based on how it looked)

Have also wiped faces with spit on tissues, and most of the others above.

My childhood self would hate me!

Maryz Mon 16-May-11 18:09:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BellaBearisWideAwake Mon 16-May-11 18:10:41

Oh yes, and "I will reason with my tantrumming toddler" hmm

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