If your children share rooms then when did you start them sharing? (WWYD)

[bebemooneedsabreak]

Background:
currently dc1 (2yo), dc2 due in Aug.
Have 3 bedroom townhouse,
top floor: master, and 2nd bedroom,
middle floor: 3rd bedroom, and living room,
bottom floor: kitchen, and garage.
Second bedroom currently nursery for dd plenty large enough for 2nd cot (currently has cot and opened futon bed in it and has plenty of floor space for play, small norebo (toy) shelf, chest of drawers).
3rd bedroom (small double bedroom) currently the hobby/spare room lots of crafting stuff, guitars, desktop computer and printer it's next to the main bathroom.

Debate in the house is:
whether after the initial stay in our room the baby can go into the nursery with dc1 (dc1 will be 3ish by this point)
(my opinion is this is the ideal option as less moving things/trying to find space for hobby stuff/ less money spent)
OR
whether the kids should be in separate rooms thus meaning setting up the spare room as 2nd kid's bedroom
(dh's opinion is this is best option because they need their own space and possible crying/waking issues)

Further question:
If you'd go with kids in separate rooms who would you put alone on the middle floor?

[bebemooneedsabreak]

Reality my thinking exactly... :)

[Francagoestohollywood]

I'd put them in the same room, unless their sleep patterns are completely different!

[grumpypants]

I would wait and see what the reaction was to the baby first - baby 'trapped' in a cot at the mercy of resentful toddler - cue snatching away of toys, blankets, teasing etc. Ours shared from when the 'baby' was less vulnerable - I don't mean anything terrible could happen, I just mean the oldest one might not like having a non fun person in their room.

[bebemooneedsabreak]

In the long run we will be waiting and see how things progress with sleeping and the sibling rivalry relationship.

However, at the same time, if we do decide on/are likely going with the 2 separate rooms we're I'm going to need a whole year/9m to get the proper organisation in place for the crafting stuff etal in the spare room. It will entail a great deal of work (like fitted wardrobe in master bed, buying new large pieces of furniture: replacing sofa(s) in living room to make room, buying living room chair, a desk or table, cupboards, etc, as well as buying additional things (chest of drawers etc.) for the second bedroom and moving at least 4 shelving units of books to who knows where) which, because of costs and time, will need to be taken in steps.

But I'm also interested to know what other people have done, and what they think about the situation to help sway me one way or the other.

[Georgimama]

In that kind of house I would have them share or take the small double ourselves if it is at all feasible. But I don't see children sharing a room as any kind of issue. I am pregnant with number 2 and we are moving into his room when this baby is 6 months old and they will share our room as it is bigger. But you can easily fit a double bed (not against a wall) and bedside tables in his room, and it has fitted wardrobes so we will be fine. All we do is sleep in there, it's not like we need much space.

[bebemooneedsabreak]

The master-bed has the ensuite and to be honest the current nursery is as big as the master-bed so the space in that room will definitely not be an issue.

[SummerRain]

ds1 went in with dd when he was 8 months old and they shared til after ds2 was born when I realised my mad pregnancy nesting to create a nursery had been a bit of a waste seeing as we keep the babies in our room til well over 6 months so dd got the 'nursery' as her room and the cot was moved into ds1's room, he had about 6 months of ds2 not being in there much but since then they've shared happily.

ds1 actually prefers sharing, and dd won't sleep with her door closed now as she doesn't really like being on her own... lucky fr her she has 4 cats who are happy to invade her bed

[AuldAlliance]

DS2 moved into DS1's bedroom at about 10mths, I think, when I finally shifted him out of our room. I'd not done it sooner as I didn't want him waking DS1 at night. DS1 was almost 5 then, so considerably older than your DD will be.

DS1 had specifically asked to share with his baby brother when we moved to this house, though he could have had his own room. Sometimes he says he'd like a room of his own, when DS2 and he are quarrelling, or he gets sick of having to put special toys out of reach, but basically they like sharing and it works well.

If one of them is ill and nights are disrupted, DS1 goes on the sofabed in DH's study. That happens rarely and I've been stunned at how much noise DS1 sleeps through.

If you want to keep the hobbies room as a spare room, then try the kids sharing. If not, I'd put the smallest one on the middle floor, as they will not really grasp the distance whereas the older child would. And the older child might be flattered and see it as a sign of maturity, and it would be one less source of elder sibling jealousy.

[bebemooneedsabreak]

Thanks Summer and Auld, (and everyone else too really) it helps make me feel like the first option is really a reasonable one... Auld it's an interesting point about if one or the other is sick... and making sure the spare room stays usable as either the sick room or the well room is a very good idea!
What I will do is start continue paring down the hobby things and try to rid the living room and master bed of clutter and maybe replace the one sofa pre-emptively and maybe even put the built in wardrobe in the master bed 'just in case' we go with option 2 (as Grumpy says we'll have a better idea as things progress)

[naturalbaby]

ds2 went into ds1's room when he moved out of ours at 7months. ds1 was 2ish and over a year later it's been great. both of them are fine if the other is noisy at night - ds2 didn't sleep through till 12months and ds1 sometimes has a nightmare and screams/cries in his sleep. we moved up to a loft conversion a few months later and it's been a pain to go down to settle them but it's quite an open house - all the doors are always open, and it's been fine. i did think about moving ds1 into his own room the other day but it's so convenient having them together. we have been really lucky with no sibling rivalry or jealousy. if anything they have too much fun and often are awake for ages giggling and laughing at eachother.

we now have a 3rd baby and will probably put him in with his big brothers too and keep the other big bedroom as a playroom. our hobby room is a small box room which baby uses for naps in a moses basket during the day - i've had to do a major tidy in there!

[bebemooneedsabreak]

I find it really reassuring that (so far) all of you have said the kids managed together. (This backs up my memories of childhood where I shared with my sisters) Dh was only 1 of 2 and so they had separate rooms from the get go, plus he did get along with his sister...
I really feel that for the first couple of years (until dc1 is 5 -or more really) sharing a room would be fine. We'll see how it goes. If and when we move we intend to get a slightly bigger place/ a better arrangement of rooms and then when have different situations to deal with :)

[midnightexpress]

I'd put them in the same room. We avoided putting ds1 and ds2 in together for ages because we were terrified that ds2, who was a terrible sleeper, would disturb ds1, who was a great sleeper. Eventually, we put them in together when some friends came to stay when ds2 was about 2.4 and guess what? He's slept like a log ever since. I think all he wanted was some company, which is fair enough. And ds1 continues to sleep like a log. So, I wish we'd done it earlier, really. They are 4 and 5 now, and still like being in the same room, but we'll have to see how it goes as they get older.

[bebemooneedsabreak]

I meant he and his sister didn't get along...not did... (they have completely different temperaments)

[youngjoly]

In your situation I would have the two children sharing and then use the third room as a playroom for the children.

My two DDs shared rooms from when DD2 was 1. DD1 is now turning 7, and has just started asking for her own room. Up to now, they have always shared. The only thing I did find helps is that we had a playroom downstairs for all their toys and also then the bedroom was literally just a room for sleeping in, so they didn't play in there and therefore didn't see it as a room for playing. They only went in there to sleep, and so did settle down to sleep quite easily (not always the case when siblings share!).