I reluctantly turn 40 next year, I've followed many a 3rd child or not 3rd child thread and have decided we're done! 2 dc, 4 and 2, I feel blessed to have 2 healthy happy dc.
Far too many reasons why I panic at the thought of another pregnancy, newborn, toddler.... but yesterday was horrific pushing the buggy in heavy cold freezing rain getting soaked. Another baby would mean pushing for a few more years! never mind DH and I are also exhausted....
But I do wobble at the thought of not having my dream 3 children, but that dream was before I knew the reality of how hard it is having and raising them especially with no help around!
Practically, I am the same, I'm also turning 40 - 5 & 2 perfect mad boys.
I'd love to have a girl but really we are starting to rebuild our lives now, fitness, hobbies etc. I feel human again and life feels easier for me.
My hubby isnt baby friendly at all, and near enough brought them up to toddler-hood myself and it was a hard slog, not as happy as I had hoped. He is self employed and I have had to help run the business 7 days a week as well as bringing them up. Disappointed with the lack of help from both grandparents too. Anymore I feel as though theyd run a mile.
I am starting to look my age too and would say I'm too old to consider anymore.
I'm gutted as I always thought 3 was perfect but life didnt turn out as good as I dreamt when in my twenties and only re-married in early thirties. On the other hand there are other friends who have been so unlucky in love and are still single who'd love to have had children.
I totally understand how you feel - suppose we cant have it all.