money and children...advice please!!!!

[linconlass]

We are proffessionally qualified in nhs jobs - our mortgage is like lots of us !! high and we support children in hobbies and intrests and eat well but hardly go out and never have hols abroad .We struggle all the time financially and often have to say to the children we cant afford this and that..i dont think thats a problem as its good to save - wekk kids can we cant !! an d wait for things.troble is our children often say are we poor...why can so and so afford it ...eg sim income family to us but with less mortgage due to inhertinances etc ,family help.I cant seem to get thro to kids that a lot of folk are in same boat..what do you sya to your children - i dont want them to worry but at same time they need to know that we cant afford things- like many folk!!!

[Mij]

How old are they? Makes a big difference I think. It's possible to be straight about money without making it sound scary, but has to be age appropriate.

I say to 4yr old DD (who is entering the pestering phase, learned from friends with older siblings!) that we have to spend money on what's most important between whatever she's talking about at the time and other essential expenditure, and then if we have anything left over we can decide what's next important. She kind of gets it enough to pipe down about most things. But I have every intention of sitting her down with a spreadsheet when she's 8 or so and complaining about not having whatever the latest technology her friends have got, so she can see the maths we're working with. Assuming that doesn't expose her to the reality of a massive debt and threat of eviction, of course [hmmm, maybe I haven't thought that through...]

Actually, I've just realised that's exactly waht my Dad did when I asked why we had a knackered car and I was being picked on about it. Bollocks, turning into my parents, again.