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Two girls and then a boy .... how was it for you?

(21 Posts)
Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 10:26:43

I hasten to add, this is hypothetical atm, as I don't know what I am having, boy or girl!

But for the last 6.5 years I have dealt only with girls (I have two dds), and I am thinking that having a boy may be a big shock - maybe not at the newborn stage, but further down the line.

Are they really so different, or is that a fatuous remark from an ignoramus? I simply can't imagine myself with a baby boy.

Pamina3 Fri 17-Jun-05 10:28:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 10:35:13

That's partly why I didn't want to know what I was having, Pamina - I was worried that if I found out it was a boy before it was born then I wouldn't "bond" with it.

BROWNY Fri 17-Jun-05 10:42:12

I had two girls first, when I was pregnant with my 3rd I really wanted to know the sex (I'd also asked with my 2nd but they weren't 100%), I was over the moon when they told me I was having a boy (of course I'd have loved another daughter, but it was so exciting to be told a boy was on his way). All through the pregnancy, I spoke to my little man, chose a few clothes and tried to choose names with the help of my girls .

He has been such a love, he's almost 6 now and is definately "mummy's boy", I get so many kisses and cuddles!! My 4th (born last year in May), was the icing on the cake, I knew we were having a boy and my son couldn't wait for him to be born - he always cuddles up to me on the couch with his head on my bump talking to him - so very cute! Today they all love my ds (12 months) and there's absolutely no jealousy at all - lucky me eh?[gin]

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 10:47:45

hehe Browny, I could just do with a gin....

Nice to hear you have had such a positive experience - I'm at best ambivalent about having a boy.

Pamina3 Fri 17-Jun-05 10:50:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BROWNY Fri 17-Jun-05 10:51:30

Sorry about teasing you with the gin , when are you due? Seriously it's lovely to dress your new baby in blue when you've been buying/washing pink for three years!! There is only 19 months difference between my two daughters, and 22 months between my second daughter and 1st son - then we had a break, we always planned to have one more baby when ds started school - I found out I was pregnant in August as my son started school in September - arn't we clever! [grin} not gin!!

BROWNY Fri 17-Jun-05 10:51:30

Sorry about teasing you with the gin , when are you due? Seriously it's lovely to dress your new baby in blue when you've been buying/washing pink for three years!! There is only 19 months difference between my two daughters, and 22 months between my second daughter and 1st son - then we had a break, we always planned to have one more baby when ds started school - I found out I was pregnant in August as my son started school in September - arn't we clever! [grin} not gin!!

nutcracker Fri 17-Jun-05 10:58:59

Hiya, my 2 dd's were 5 and 3 when i got pregnant with my 3rd. I was very very worried about having a boy and was convinced I wouldn't have a clue what to do with it.
The pregnancy was quite different to the others so by the time it got to the 20 week scan i had already convinced my self it was a boy, but decided to ask at the scan anyway.
I was right it was a boy and strangly I felt absolutly fine about it, still a bit apprehensive but otherwise ok.
I went straight from the scan to the shops and brought lots of blue clothes .

I had alot of probs in ds's pregnancy and I think that made our bond even stronger as I was terrified somehing would go wrong.

Ds has fitted in to all our lives so well and I bonded easier with him than the dd's too. He is a really mummys boy and I couldnot imagine life without him now.

I would love a little brother for him, but thats another story.

Anyway, good luck, you will be fine wether it is a boy or a girl honestly.

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 10:59:03

Not long now browny, due at the end of July

I think if this one had come along soon after the girls, it wouldn't seem such a big thing, but my dds are 8 and 6.5, so I've had a long time of just girls! It's not like they are both "girly" girls either - dd2 is, but dd1 is a real tomboy.

But are boys really different to handle? I've got friends who just tear their hair out over their ds's behaviour compared to their dds.

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 11:03:18

nutty I was hoping you would post

That's reassuring. This is the big thing I am feeling at the moment - worried that if I have a boy I won't know what to do with it and that I won't bond with it.

Ironically the pregnancy has been just the same as teh previous two!

tamum Fri 17-Jun-05 11:06:06

I've never had any problems with ds that are caused by him being a boy, FWIW! I know they can be very boisterous, but's not inevitable, and not that awful anyway. I have one of each and the differences between them are more ot do with their individual personalities than their sex, if you see what I mean. I think it's quite understandable not being able to imagine yourself with a baby of a different sex, but it changes the moment they're there

Pamina3 Fri 17-Jun-05 11:07:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 11:09:13

Hmm... the other thing I worry about is feeling relief if it is a girl - 'cos then I will feel guilty ...

... not that I'm obsessing or anything...

I just don't have enough to do at the moment!!!

BROWNY Fri 17-Jun-05 11:10:02

Miaou, you must be getting tired now - especially when the weather is hot - I had my dds in an extremely hot summer in 1997 (I didn't actually go out of doors for the whole of the August). I hope you have a quick and happy delivery - with not too much pain!.

I've found my ds1 is so much more affectionate than my daughters, so far I've had no problems whatsoever with him, he is very emotional and sulks just the same as the girls - but in other ways he is such a real boy - loves his toy cars, playing football with his sisters and just running about!

I've got a tomboy too - my dd2 (almost 8 years old), she refuses point-blank to wear the school summer dress (she actually gets extremely distressed when asked to put it on) and sweats all day in her white shirt and trousers! She plays with the under 8's boy's football team and is often "man of the match". Is your tomboy full of bruises and constantly full of mud too?

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 11:12:00

Tamum, Thank you - fwiw, I feel pretty "shallow" worrying about it really - after all in a way it's no different to these women who have baby after baby hoping it's going to be a girl "to go shopping with and have our nails done together" grrr - having a child is so much more about their personality than their gender, you are right. And now I am contradicting myself!

Pamina3 Fri 17-Jun-05 11:13:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 11:16:47

Browny, dd1 is quite a quiet, delicate little thing really - but she wants to be a soldier when she grows up, and we had to buy her shorts for school because she wouldn't entertain a summer dress! And she plays with the boys at school.

Miaou Fri 17-Jun-05 11:18:28

I know you are right guys!!!! Thanks!

tamum Fri 17-Jun-05 11:23:03

Janh Fri 17-Jun-05 12:00:17

Miaou, when DS1 was born (DDs were 3 and 6) I have to admit to having hoped for another girl throughout pregnancy and being fleetingly disappointed when they announced that he was a boy; however later on, when I mentioned to several people (in the course of a conversation like this) that I had felt like that they didn't believe me because, as one said, "but you never put him down!" Not strictly true as I recall but it's how it seemed to them.

It's true that boys are generally different from girls in many ways, but I do believe that exactly how rough, tough and boisterous they are is determined by how they are handled. If you treat a baby boy in pretty much the same way you treat your baby girls then he's unlikely to be a little thug. IMHO.

DS1 has always been a rambunctious character but he is also very kind, thoughtful and sensitive - I think a little boy with 2 older sisters benefits in many ways.

Anyway your baby will be as lovely as the rest of you whichever kind you get!

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