What are the best spoonerisms you've heard?

[Hayls]

Unfortunately these came from me:
when trying to remember the names of the 7 dwarves- Doc, Sneezy, DUMPY and GROPEY. Thought my mum would cry laughing

when explaining why we weren't going out on Easter Sunday to my mum- the bunny c*nt's been hancelled...

[Bonkerz]

betty swollocks! my dh always uses this spoonerism!!

[Blu]

We had to undertake a most tedious excercise courtesy of a gvt quango, called 'Ranking and Weighting'. I always called it 'wanking and rating'.

And a colleague accidentallly called Jill Dando Jan Dildo.

DS sings 'Bingle Jells, Bingle Jells..' - but says that is how his bear pronounces it because he is only 3.5 weeks old!

[ScrewballMuppet]

I didn't realise there was a word for this. I often mix up words when I go to say one thing and change my mind and come out with a concoction of the two
will have athink which one was the best

[Hayls]

Thinking of more... dh says Rappy Nash and just told me his dad refers to a jig bobby

[Hayls]

(big jobby btw)

[Nightynight]

blu
ranking and weighting it wd take a govt dept to think that up!

[jampots]

BIL once went into a store and asked for "shitted feets"

[ScrewballMuppet]

lol

[mouseman]

our local toddler group is called Tiddlers and Tots - I call it Toddlers and T*ts every single time (just as appropriate though!)

[bunny2]

My MIL asked what I was going to buy dh for his birthday. I meant to say a "stunt kite" but it came out "cunt stite" I think she is still wondering what on earth a stite is.

[babster]

Lemon Turd Cart. I was too young to know why my mum was laughing so hard.

[madmarchhare]

When people are being a little bit silly, MIL (you really would have to know her to appreciate) calls them a dickhead and still has absolutely no idea why we all all ROFL.

[madmarchhare]

just realised it not what were on about!

[whymummy]

lol at all of these
while visiting dh in hospital i went to make myself a coffee,the woman that looked after the coffee trolley was horrible,i looked at the kettle and asked her "is the hotter wat?" she looked at me up and down and went "what???" i had to leave cos i was laughing so much and she was getting angrier and angrier

[charleepeters]

i always ask dp to go to the shop to get me some Jen and berrys ice cream stange thing is he always knows what i mean!

[JoolsToo]

don't know why but I always say par cark

[whymummy]

i've also said coughy chest instead of chesty cough

[marjoriedawessassy]

Our physics teacher once told us all to wrap the magnet in the fooking coil (cooking foil)!

[frogs]

Ds did this a lot, and still does occasionally, though he's nearly 6. My all-time favourites were Pinnie the Wooh and cockporn (popcorn). Needless to say, we had to stop making the stuff for a while...

[binkie]

Oh, shitted feets, I have tears running down. I think it's because of the imagined John Lewis lady

Not a spoonerism, but my mum who's quite brisk, once told me (when v little) to put on your drawing-rooms and go into the slipper - and was Not Amused when the entire family fell about

[hunkermunker]

PMSL at these!

I can't say width restriction - always ridth westiction.

I often have trouble with using the right word though - I get a bit forgetful halfway through a sentence and have talked about taking things out of the office (oven), called hayfever gingerbread and admired fire engines (fir trees) on a Christmas card.

[Dior]

Message withdrawn

[Pinotmum]

I was making fun of dh and getting the better of him and he said "you're a cunny funt aren't you?"