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my thought for the day: is all kindness really just self serving behaviour?

(5 Posts)
hobbgoblin Tue 01-Sep-09 20:53:50

So, when we act kindly or generously or seemingly selflessly, are we truly being selfless or do we do it because of how it makes us feel? Or, in worst case scenario because of what we can gain from being 'nice'?

colditz Tue 01-Sep-09 20:55:35

If someone falls over in the street, I stop and help them because I am a human being, and they are a human being, and wouldn't it be awful to fall over and have nobody stop and help you?

I think most kind acts are like this.

colditz Tue 01-Sep-09 20:56:30

Expanding on your idea about kindness being for the purpose of your own feelings, if I DIDN'T act on that kind impulse, i KNOW I would feel bad. For Ever.

hobbgoblin Tue 01-Sep-09 20:58:54

well you see i am generous with my time without thinking but i have been known to bring a tear to me own eye before now at my own loveliness blush hmm which is very worrying.

crokky Tue 01-Sep-09 21:02:12

Mostly, I am kind to people because like colditz says, they are human beings.

Occasionally, I do it for other reasons. eg we were at a family attraction. DS (3) was looking at things in tanks. He moved carefully sideways and accidentally bumped (very softly) into an older woman. The woman turned to my 3yo and screamed in his face "BLOODY KIDS" so I said in a very calm and nice voice, "DS, say sorry to the lady" and he say "sorry" very sweetly. She then turned her back on him. It made her look like an idiot and people round us started laughing at her behaviour. If I had shouted back at her, I would have looked like a fool, but because I was sweet and kind to her, she looked like the fool.

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