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Am I really living up to my name as my best friend called me last night

(16 Posts)
StupidCOw Mon 04-Apr-05 10:56:16

Dd2 is to start nursery soon and I am finding it hard to come to terms with, she is my last born and i won't be having any more.

We have had a special relationship since birth as she was very ill. I have been given a start date which isn't very far away and have been sluffened all morning, i was hoping they would say they couldn't have her as she isn't fully potty trained, but that is no problem.

I told my best friend last night and she called me a stupid cow saying that i have done it with dd1 so why should it be any different for dd2. She doesn't have any children and is very very career minded so i don't think she totally understands.

What do you all think, am i being stupid?

Gobbledigook Mon 04-Apr-05 10:57:07

Nope! Not stupid at all. She's a silly old cow, not you!

expatinscotland Mon 04-Apr-05 10:57:25

No. But I think it's out of order to call a friend a 'stupid cow'.

BadgerBadger Mon 04-Apr-05 10:59:04

You aren't!

I find it really hard too. (Not saying that I'm not a stupic cow, I'm sure I am at times, just not for this reason!).

If you aren't ready to let her got in yet, can you delay it for a while? Until the September term maybe?

BadgerBadger Mon 04-Apr-05 10:59:33

(Sorry for the typos!)

Twiglett Mon 04-Apr-05 11:00:09

I hate moving my baby up to the next size clothes - she's on the cusp of needing 12 to 18 month babygros at the moment (she's 11 months)

its cos she's my second (and possibly my last ) and I've realised how quickly it all goes past so developmental stages I couldn't wait for with DS I don't want to happen that quickly with DD

I don't think either of you are stupid - but a woman without children could never understand what it feels like to have children, just as now I can't quite remember what it feels like not to have children (apart from a slight sadness regarding what people without children are missing out on)

snafu Mon 04-Apr-05 11:01:31

What a charming friend you have. But then again there's no way she could possibly understand how you feel, so I'd say ignore her and talk to us instead

Does dd2 have to start nursery on that date?

nutcracker Mon 04-Apr-05 11:25:36

No you are not a stupid cow.

I feel exactly the same about my Ds. He is my last child and i just want him to be with me forever and ever.
Have recently been persuaded to put his name down for 2 days at nursery and i hate it.
It is silly i know because he does need to go and start making friends etc etc without me there but i will find it really hard i know i will.

saadia Mon 04-Apr-05 12:09:20

I found it very difficult to start ds1 at nursery - Lord knows what I'll be like when ds2 - probably my lastborn - goes. It's not stupid at all - particularly if ds2 was ill. They're your babies, it's only natural to feel in your heart that they should be with you, even if you know in your head that they need to be with other kids.

StupidCOw Mon 04-Apr-05 14:37:08

No she doesn't have to go, but I think it will be better for her as she is very clingy (so people say) I just wonder if its because we have such a strong bond. She has always been a mummy's girl. I don't know if going in september would be any easier to be honest, so i think it my be better if she goes now if you know what i mean and then I get it over and done with.

Its not the first time this friend has said something like this though, she says i take preference over one, i am too harsh and once when dd2 was eating chicken nuggets with her fingers (she was 2) she called her disgusting and said there were lots of germs etc and for months after dd1 had a thing about washing her hands.

hunkermunker Mon 04-Apr-05 14:38:48

Your friend sounds like the stupid cow hun. Is she nice about other things? Sounds like you might be better off...letting things slide a bit? Sorry if that seems harsh, but it sounds like she's really picking on you.

NomDePlume Mon 04-Apr-05 14:40:49

tell her to fuck off and come back when she's had kids of her own.

NomDePlume Mon 04-Apr-05 14:41:10

your friend I mean !

charellie Mon 04-Apr-05 14:42:12

No, you're not being stupid. My twins start in 2 weeks time as well. Like you, I know that they really need to go as they will gain so much from being away from me but I know I will find their first day very hard as it means they aren't babies anymore.

StupidCOw Mon 04-Apr-05 14:43:27

Nope, your not being harsh, I do sometimes wonder how she would or if she could cope if she has children of her own. She is VERY VERY career minded at the minded, but saying that, has no savings whatsoever, so has nothing to show for it except having a big house. She has made it quite clear that she will be the main bread winner in the house and her hubby has to give up his job.

We have also argued on the fact that if she got pregnant now she would'nt think twice about an abortion.

I don't really want to let the friendship slide as she is dd1's godmother.

hunkermunker Mon 04-Apr-05 14:49:57

LOTS of people don't know their godparents when they get older. If she's making you miserable, don't feel you have to keep in touch with her. She doesn't sound like she's worth it, frankly. And your DD1 wouldn't miss out by not having her around, it doesn't sound like.

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