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Good idea for a present or terribly offensive?

(20 Posts)
JuneBugJen Mon 11-Aug-08 09:34:26

Advice please.

I have a friend who is having her 3rd baby. She has all the 'stuff' she needs so I was thinking of getting all our friends to club in to get some cleaners (very trustworthy) in to do a spring clean of her house before the baby arrives as a baby present.

I know the state of her house (pretty messy! but what do you expect with 2 other dcs and a 3rd on the way!) is a source of irritation to her.

Is this a terrible idea or should I just give her vouchers for a pedicure?

maidamess Mon 11-Aug-08 09:35:37

It sounds like a good idea..but maybe you should give her the choice rather than springing it on her.

iMum Mon 11-Aug-08 09:36:09

I am due soon, if she doesnt like it can I have it please! my house is a huge source of iriitation to me!

Tortington Mon 11-Aug-08 09:36:29

i would have to clean before a cleaner came to get it to a reasonable standard of messy - if it was v. messy - am not sure on this one tbh

FioFio Mon 11-Aug-08 09:36:31

Message withdrawn

bogie Mon 11-Aug-08 09:36:37

I would love someone to get me claners as a present, but some people might be offened it all depends on your friend and how you think she will take it.

onepieceoflollipop Mon 11-Aug-08 09:36:55

I think you will get a mixed response to this. Personally I would not wish to be given a present like this. However I have seen threads where other posters have said it is a fab idea.

Could you ask your friend, initially in a jokey sort of manner, to test the water?

FabioFridgeFluffFrenzy Mon 11-Aug-08 09:37:07

I think you need her permission for the big clean,and you have to be v careful about how you word it.

It might be safer to offer to pay for a cleaner for a few weeks, to give her 'more time to spend with the baby'

maidamess Mon 11-Aug-08 09:37:07

Get them to tackle her ironing pile too. I bet its enormous.

ThatBigGermanPrison Mon 11-Aug-08 09:37:08

Ask her, but wait until she next mentions her annoyance at the house, and mention a relative of yours who had this and was really jolly pleased with it. Don't, for God's sake, give the slightest hint it is needed.

I'd have loved this, my house was a tip with ds2 and I would have loved someone to come and wave a wand.

JuneBugJen Mon 11-Aug-08 09:37:59

agree maidamess - but I didn't want to offer it to her if it was fundamentally a terrible idea and she thought it was a slur against her!

Just thinking that I would have killed for a cleaner before 2nd ds so I wouldn't have felt so guilty about the EEC fluff mountain on the floor like imum!

sweetcat Mon 11-Aug-08 09:38:23

think I'd be a bit offended actually, even if it is a very thoughtful present, but then I would have to have a spotless house before I would let a cleaner in grin

JuneBugJen Mon 11-Aug-08 09:40:03

ah, that's the problem sweetcat, thats exactly how I wouldn't want her to feel!

Perhaps will go with TBGP idea and work it into conversation.

belgo Mon 11-Aug-08 09:40:28

I would love it, I'm also expecting my third child and it's very hard to get all the housework done - it's continuous.

sweetcat Mon 11-Aug-08 09:44:30

Now if you had asked me first I might have felt better about it. I wouldn't have liked it sprung on me even if I could have done with the help.

Everyone's different I guess, you know her well enough to mention it in conversation so personally I would do that. << sweetcat wishes she had such thoughtful friends instead of ones buying a million cuddly toys blush>>

DillyTanty Mon 11-Aug-08 09:47:35

deffo you should work it into convo, no question. an alternative is stocking up her freezer with home-cooked food, a friend did that for me and it was heavenly...

Countingthegreyhairs Mon 11-Aug-08 09:48:01

I'd absolutely love it but I wouldn't want it sprung on me. Would definitely want some notice to get house in order before it is cleaned (to benefit the most from it) if that makes sense.

I wouldn't be offended - I would think what a thoughtful friend you are - an alternative would be to pay someone to do ironing for a couple of hours for 4 or 6 weeks ...

JuneBugJen Mon 11-Aug-08 09:49:31

sweetcat - this is why i didnt want to get a little pressie! Stuffed toys are the bane of my life!

Will check with her in a roundabout way then if happy with it give the money to cleaners and give her the number so she can have it when she wants.

Thanks for all the advice! At least I know its not a dog of an idea.

JuneBugJen Mon 11-Aug-08 09:50:28

good ideas dilly and countingthe... home cooked stuff would also be good.

Tas1 Wed 13-Aug-08 20:37:25

I would have loved to have had my house cleaned but agree with others that maybe you should give her a choice just to be on the safe side.

What a fab friend you are.

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