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Boy in ds's class turned up on my doorstep

(53 Posts)
givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 16:39:04

Ds has invited a friend over to play today. on the way back from collecting his friend we saw another boy who is in their class looking for somewhere to go. He apparently told ds that he would come down to ours, which he subsequently did do. Thing is, this boy is really quite naughty and is left to roam the streets as he pleases and i dont really want ds getting friendly with him. Luckily dh opened the door to him and invited him in thinking he just wanted to speak to ds not to come in and play so now we're stuck with him as I feel I cant just turf him out. Also dont want to encourage him to just drop in when he feels like it. any tips or am i just being a nasty mummy? Ds isnt too keen either

Cod Sat 12-Feb-05 16:39:46

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Lonelymum Sat 12-Feb-05 16:44:59

How old is he? I had a visitor like this several times during the summer holidays (a friend of ds1 coming to play uninvited). He also seemed to be allowed out alone, and frequently turned up with a five pound note in his hand saying he was on his way to the shops which I found very odd - he was the same age as my ds1 (8) and I don't let my ds1 go out alone except to play on the green 100 yards away from our house.

Anyway, one day, his mother turned up in the street calling for him and I felt very embarrassed that I had let him stay at our house (though only for a short time). It made me realise that, evern though she apparently left her son to wander the village alone, I really should have rung her up and checked with her that it was OK for him to be with us (Unlike your visitor, I had no objections to the boy himself). Could you find out his home number and ring his mother? She may want him home!

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 16:51:04

They're all 8 too LM. Obviously tea time is approaching and whilst I have no objection to feeding the invited child I really dont want to be feeding an uninvited commodity, plus of course its approaching dusk. I think i will ring his mum (if i can establish a number from him) and let her know he's here. Of course its also pi$$ed me off that he's joined into ds and his friend's playtime.

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 17:09:33

his phone number is engaged. My friend has also had him turn up at her house and he says he doesnt have to be home 'til 7pm! So do I just kick him out on to the road at tea time or what?

Cod Sat 12-Feb-05 17:11:00

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Lonelymum Sat 12-Feb-05 17:11:46

Could you walk him home or would it be too far to go?

Cod Sat 12-Feb-05 17:12:30

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Lonelymum Sat 12-Feb-05 17:13:10

True. I only suggest it because she would never forgive herself if something happened to him.

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 17:19:30

i just suggested he should be home by dark if his parents are thinking of collecting him but he seems very nonplussed. I asked how he was getting home and he says "i have to run".

Lonelymum Sat 12-Feb-05 17:21:30

Has he gone yet? It is getting pretty dark here.

WideWebWitch Sat 12-Feb-05 17:22:34

Bloody hell, wtf are the parents of these 8 year olds doing letting them roam about on their own? I'd be wary of doing anything after my experience, <sigh> but still, I probably would take him home. Don't expect any thanks for it though. Poor boy.

noddyholder Sat 12-Feb-05 17:24:05

I would walk him home this once and tell his parents you were worried as it was getting dark Some people are so irresponsible IMO my ds is 10 and I would always want to know exactly where he was,don't these people watch the news It has put you in a difficult situation but better to be safe this once

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 17:38:44

just made him ring his home to ask them to collect him (after WWW's experience) and there's no answer !!!!!

Caligula Sat 12-Feb-05 17:44:17

If it were a nursery they'd call SS!

Maybe they're out looking for him though?

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 17:45:59

dark now here and pi$$ing down and given that his parents arent even in, I am minded to just keep him here 'til they turn up - if they ask around they could work out where he is. Will have to forego my not really liking the child for the sake of his welfare though and feed him. I cannot believe how f*cking irresponsible some people are though

WideWebWitch Sat 12-Feb-05 17:47:31

It's so awful isn't it givenupforlent? (who are you usually? or are you new?) I think you're right to hang on to him until you can find his parents. He does know his number does he? You're ringing the right one?

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 17:57:01

www - i am a regular poster who has given up for lent but sometimes you just have to ask for a fair opinion hence my posting on completely relevant threads!!!

Apparently the number is right

noddyholder Sat 12-Feb-05 18:03:48

i am starting to feel really sorry for him now he probably knows they don't care where he goes They are truly unbelievable

WideWebWitch Sat 12-Feb-05 18:05:12

(ah, you think we should get blue eyed children so they don't persuade us to not carry out threatened punishments don't you? I have worked out who you are, saddo that I am!)

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 18:13:01

hee hee hee

Lonelymum Sat 12-Feb-05 18:14:06

I have to admit, if I were in this situation, I would feel obliged to take him to his house just in case they are back/ the number is wrong/ they are out looking for him. Surely no-one lets their 8 yo wander off and not worry where they are after dark. The boy who visited us did at least do it during daylight hours.

givenupforlent Sat 12-Feb-05 18:15:58

it would appear he is regularly out after dark . I asked if his parents would be worried and he shrugged and said "dont know" !!!!

Dinner is on atm anyway so maybe after dinner I will get him to call again and then they can collect.

franch Sat 12-Feb-05 18:16:44

This is astonishing and very, very sad. I will be fascinated to hear the outcome.

Lonelymum Sat 12-Feb-05 18:20:11

I wouldn't take the boy's answers as gospel truth. He isn't going to admit his parents are worried as he is obviously trying to stay on at your house. Is their a neighbours number he knows or a grandparents? Just think, if his parents are out looking for him (however wrong we may think they are for letting him out in the first place, they may be worried sick by now) you should try to do what you can to reunite them. Or am I being unreasonable?

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