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Separate beds - could you, would you, should you?

(53 Posts)
Moomina Mon 31-Jan-05 21:17:01

Since splitting with xh, I've come to love sleeping alone and think that, in the unlikely event that the opportunity ever arises again , I would now really resent having to share my bed on a regular basis. I am even thinking that I might make separate rooms a condition of any future co-habitation! (Can you tell I'm beating 'em off with a sharp stick these days?)

But I'm starting to think that there is nothing as blissful as a double bed all for me, with no snoring, smelly, grunting man in it. Agree, or disagree?

doggiewalker Mon 31-Jan-05 21:19:53

ooh yeh it's great having the bed to yourself! If dh goes away for the night, I snuggle up with a book and a cup of tea and a hot water bottle - bliss.

However, I suspect that should you find the new "Mr Right", you'll be so busy bonking like rabbits that you won't want to be in separate beds!

lunavix Mon 31-Jan-05 21:20:47

Empty double bed... and not having to get up in the morning!

Double bliss!

jessicasmummy Mon 31-Jan-05 21:21:01

DH is away tonight - all the bed all to myself! We do spend the odd night apart even wehen we are together - my sofa loves me and i lvoe my sofa when i need a night of uninterupted sleep!

Moomina Mon 31-Jan-05 21:21:12

Well, separate rooms with visiting rights, maybe...

pedilia Mon 31-Jan-05 21:22:51

DH snores so loud that a night by myself is bliss, especially when the kids worm their way in !!

Gobbledigook Mon 31-Jan-05 21:24:15

Agree. Especially as dh has been a complete 't**t' tonight and I might just sleep in the spare double!

edam Mon 31-Jan-05 21:32:35

The rich have always done separate rooms, haven't they...
Dh snores really badly so he's often kicked into ds's room. Hate to think what will happen when ds is old enough to object to daddy's snoring!

paolosgirl Mon 31-Jan-05 21:41:41

I posted on this a while back, after dh's snoring reached unacceptable level and he moved into the spare room (with visiting rights, although he's being a complete t*at tonight, so that mught not happen again for a long time). I felt awful at the begininng, but love it now. We both get a decent nights sleep, and I've stopped resenting him for waking me every night. The only thing that worries me is what eveyone else - and the kids when they're old enough to wonder - will make of it.

Gobbledigook Mon 31-Jan-05 21:44:10

PG - your dh is a t**t tonght too? Is there something in the water (or could just be in the genes? )

LapsedGymJunkie Mon 31-Jan-05 21:58:04

What stage is the moon at ??

I opened the Coffee Bar on here yesterday at 7.39 a.m Having already done a load/unload on the dishwasher...........EARLY

I would have opened one at 4.30 am this morning, but was afraid if I came on here I would stay on here.

As BF was still here, had to decamp to bed settee.

Felt so traumatised that I did not go to the gym. Went home after dropping DS to play school and did something I have never done. Watched Trisha and This Morning, before having a shower and collecting DS.

When I told DH, he said ooooooppppppps you must have been knackered to choose Trisha over MN

paolosgirl Mon 31-Jan-05 22:05:52

I wonder if it's the moon that turns them into nasty, stubborn, unreasonable oafs, the time of the month, or man genes??
Whatever it is, I dislike him tonight.

Tommy Mon 31-Jan-05 22:08:41

I've always thought that sharing a bed is a bit "unnatural" IYSWIM - you don't do it all your life, then you're expected to do it for the rest of your life! My DH always wakes me up when he comes to bed, snores and farts in bed (good thing I love him really!)and, TBH, I alwyas enjoy my sleep better when he's not there!

vict17 Mon 31-Jan-05 22:08:45

whenever I know I won't sleep well, or have to get some sleep as have important meeting the next day, or feel ill dh is sent to the study to sleep. He's really sweet and often suggests it and sometimes says 'is it okay if I sleep with you tonight?'!!!

colditzmum Mon 31-Jan-05 22:12:51

I think it is pointless to train your children to sleep on their own in their own bed, as later in life that is exactly what they will want and expect, and they won't get it then!

I had a double bed all to myself when I was a child, and have always resented sharing my bed. I hate it.

Caligula Mon 31-Jan-05 22:15:12

I would love to sleep alone, but at about midnight every night, 2.75 year old DD creeps into bed and snuggles up. At about 4am, DS creeps in. They both then sleep as close as they can to me, so that I am firmly wedged between them and when I turn over, one of them kicks me.

I don't know if that's better or a worse than a snoring, grunting, farting man!

Gobbledigook Mon 31-Jan-05 22:18:22

Caligula = that's so cute!!

You've all made my mind up - I'm in the office tonight in the spare double. I'm at the other end of the house to everyone else too so if the kids wake, big, fat lazy dh can deal with it

trefusis Mon 31-Jan-05 22:20:19

Message withdrawn

Moomina Tue 01-Feb-05 07:51:46

Talk about tempting Fate - last night ds would not settle at all so, guess what? A small, wriggly, scratchy person next to me all night! But not snoring or farting so I think I can make an exception...

hoxtonchick Tue 01-Feb-05 08:12:23

well i have dp who is the soundest sleeper in the world who comes to bed much later than me & snores occasionally on one side, ds age 3 on the other who has to sleep with his hands entwined in my hair and i'm pregnant. we need a bigger bed. fairly often dp or i end up in the spare bed. god knows what'll happen when the baby's born....

Fastasleep Tue 01-Feb-05 08:29:42

I can't sleep without my DH there, I can stay asleep if he sneaks out lol but can't get to sleep without him, even though he snores lots and farts... Then I end up waking up in the morning with my DS in bed snuggled up and he snores and farts too!! He's only 1 ...

JanH Tue 01-Feb-05 09:14:37

Of course ladies never snore or fart

Gobbledigook Tue 01-Feb-05 11:05:50

Hey girls - I had the best nights sleep in months in our spare bed last night!

Would it be really terrible if it became a sort of habit?

pipsy1 Tue 01-Feb-05 11:37:47

I'm with you there Gobbledigook and Moonina. I'd sleep in the spare room every night if I could as far as sleep is concerned - DH snoring has to be heard to be believed! But he hates it when I'm not there, and I do have to agree that cuddles and closeness are very important, think the relationship would suffer if we slept in separate rooms too often although my tiredness levels would go right down!

DaddyCool Tue 01-Feb-05 11:48:13

I've been exiled from our bed because I snore like a pig. DW says she's never had such good sleep since she met me. I've been snuggling in with DS but I think I'm starting to wake him up too . We don't have a spare bed (to deter my family visiting!) and the downstairs sofa is really cold... I'm not going to get any sympathy from you lot am I?

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