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will my almost 5 year old play with the new baby? is the gap too big?

(24 Posts)
hotHELL Thu 24-Apr-08 20:32:58

have 2 friends who tell me, never, never, and how hard it will be to entertain kids with such a big gap....please tell me that he will bloody pay with the new baby whilst i am reading the paper.....

WideWebWitch Thu 24-Apr-08 20:35:15

I have a six year gap, it's FAB.
ds loves his sister although didn't at first. Now though, he's 10.5 and she's 4.5 and at the weekend they go downstairs and get their own breakfast whiel we lie in.
they really get on, it's very lovely.

WideWebWitch Thu 24-Apr-08 20:36:03

And he will be at school so you DO get to sleep while the baby sleeps as older one at school.

ImightbeLulumama Thu 24-Apr-08 20:37:15

i have almost 6 years between mine and it works in a lot of ways. there was a period of time where DS was disappointed that DD was aruond, i thikn he thought babies arrived ready to play and do stuff, rather than spending the first 8 - 10 months totally immobile and boring. once she could move and make funny noises and stuff he was fine with her!

once she was walking it was even better and now at 8.7 and 2.8 they play really well and have done for ages now

NorthernLurker Thu 24-Apr-08 20:37:23

No it's not too big - I have a 10 year old, a 7 year old and a 1 yr old - they all play together beautifully! Ignore your friends!

hotHELL Thu 24-Apr-08 20:37:30

so i wont' have to play with them separetely? i am soooo sick of playing with power rangers, and cars, and little planes... ideally they entertain each other whilst i have a lie in....

GrapefruitMoon Thu 24-Apr-08 20:38:10

You absolutely can't predict - I think it's all down to personalities. I was really worried about this as I have a 4 yr gap between dc1 and dc2 - which is the same as the gap between me and my eldest sister. I wasn't that close to my sister when we were children but my two get on really well - much to my delight!

peanutbear Thu 24-Apr-08 20:38:10

I have a 5.5 year age gap and they get on great DS1 is nearly 10 and DS2 is 4.5

Ds1 loves to teach his brother things, they play together, talk together DS1 is reading DS2 a bed time story as we speak

TBH I have more trouble between DS2 and DD they only have 2.8 yrs betwwen them and they fight like cat and dog and DD is only 23 months!!!

hotHELL Thu 24-Apr-08 20:38:13

ohhhhh, thank you, thank you...

minster Thu 24-Apr-08 20:50:16

My 7yo & 18mo play beutifully together grin it's a brilliant age gap!

LadyPenelope Fri 25-Apr-08 09:35:42

4 year age gap between mine and now he's 3 and she's 7, they play together really well. Lot's of let's pretend stuff, chasing each other etc. We also have to referee from time to time of course, particularly when he wants to destroy her careful craft activities, but overall, they amuse each other MUCH more than I expected.

wangle99 Sun 27-Apr-08 13:34:07

I have a 6 year difference between DD and DS, they play together really well and they isolise each other! Fab gap for us!

nappyaddict Thu 17-Jul-08 09:22:15

those with a larger age gap (say 6 years) between dc1 and dc2 - did you keep all your dc1's clothes for the next child?

loler Thu 17-Jul-08 09:47:55

dd (5) and ds2 (10mnth) get on much better than ds1 (3) and ds2. She loved looking after him when he was tiny and they normally have each other in stiches now. She goes in to see him in the mornings and plays with him while I get dressed.

I wanted small age gaps so they would play together but now I've got it I think a larger age gap would have made things easier. There is less competition for time/attention as their needs would be different. There is 8 years between me and my sister, we've problably only become true friends in the last few years but the larger gap meant that we were rarely compared and I remember loving having her about.

Congratulations - he'll love the new baby!

Piffle Thu 17-Jul-08 09:50:31

wonderful gap imho
Ds2 was march 07 dd was 5 in October.
it was perfect she had school I had one baby at home which was enough!
Now ds16mths and dd is amazing with him. They play together really well she is v patient and good with him.

loler Thu 17-Jul-08 09:50:50

Just noticed that this is an old thread brought back to life!

I gave loads of my baby stuff away after every one as was no way going to have any more! I begged/borrowed it back though.

Hulababy Thu 17-Jul-08 10:01:44

Have three friends who have had babies in the last yer - each with a 6y gap. In all cases (two older girls, one older boy) the older child is wonderful with the baby, helping out, playing, making baby laugh, showing them things, etc.

There is 9 years between me and my sister and it worked really well too. Another friend has 13 years between her DS2 and DS3, again wrking well so far.

If I do manage to get pregnant then there wlill be about 7y between my DD and that baby.

nappyaddict Thu 17-Jul-08 13:52:24

awwww hulababy. hope you get a BFP soon. it must be really tough for you having been trying so long for the one thing you really want.

your loft must be creaking with over 6 years worth of dd's stuff!!

Hulababy Thu 17-Jul-08 19:14:48

nappyaddict - if only! If we do have another we have to start completely from scratch as I have passed everything on to friends and relatives, or sold. Had no stoarge when DD was little so no choice.

nappyaddict Thu 17-Jul-08 20:13:50

have the fertility clinic shed any light as to why it's taking so long?

andyrobo237 Thu 17-Jul-08 20:20:16

We have 5 year galp (almost exactly - one 14th Feb one 26th Feb!) and they get on well. When DS was a newborn DD was at school, but was very 'helpful' when at home!! Very useful for fetching nappies, etc for me!

Now she is 6 and he is 17 months they play well together - she is the ringleader and he follows her around - she reads to him, he copies everything she does - it is working out ok as long as she gets some quality one-to-one time with us.

Hulababy Thu 17-Jul-08 21:55:44

nappyaddict - they dx me with Ashermans (adhesions to uterus) a while back. Have now had two hysteroscopies with removal of adhesions, followed by heavy hormon treatment each time - recet scans show these have worked and no adhesionsscaring remain and all is clear and normal. Blood tests and other tests all ok. There is now no reason for me not getting pg, but not happening. Start Clomid next month for up to 6 months to hopefully help.

saffy202 Thu 17-Jul-08 22:05:22

I'm another with a near enough exact 5 years. They are now 14 and 9 and still 'play' together ie football/cricket. They both think the world of each other and are very close but of course would never admit it.

rolledhedgehog Fri 18-Jul-08 16:59:58

I have a 5 year 1 month gap between my eldest and youngest. Youngest is just 5 months. My eldest does play with him and I can see the little following him around like a lamb when he can walk. The baby obviously adores his big brother (his 3yr old sister he is less sure of hmm) and the big one is delighted to have a brother.

TH

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