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(50 Posts)
horseshoe Wed 29-Dec-04 14:47:33

She drives me mad....

Last year we asked her to just let us know what she was getting DD for xmas so we could make sure there were no doubles....she told us we had a cheek in even asking. Well she did double up and i thought she has learned her lesson....this year she did tell us..only xmas day she produced 3 more expensive presents on top of what she had already brought and all 3 were doubles of what i have brought dd for her birthday which is in a few days. I now dont have any receipts and have had big row with DH about it as he thinks i am picking on his family but truth is my family arn't that stupid......To top it off i just caught her in time giving DD a quality street with a peanut in it last night...DD is 2 in a few days

Thank you...feel better now

brusselbeansprouts Wed 29-Dec-04 15:02:49

Yuck, yuck and yuck! My full sympathy to you! I think you are entirely reasonable to discuss presents.... that's a real pain about double birthday presents. You wanted to ensure it didn't happen, but it's you that has to sort it out! Rant away - I would!

tillykins Wed 29-Dec-04 15:05:49

Stupid woman, whats wrong with her?

SantaGoesToTheGym Wed 29-Dec-04 15:09:27

She is an MIL and for 50% if not more that about says it all.

I have a very obliging MIL she has never interfered in DS's birthdays...................

SantaGoesToTheGym Wed 29-Dec-04 15:10:06

She did us the courtesy of dying before he was born

Thecattlearemerloting Wed 29-Dec-04 15:10:41

Agree with everything else that has been said - I'd get your dh to tackle his mother on this one. If it came directly from him she would probably take it/understand better?

Thecattlearemerloting Wed 29-Dec-04 15:11:40

Santa. Surely not all MILs are bad

SantaGoesToTheGym Wed 29-Dec-04 15:17:52

Well ..................

Horseshoe, can you tell me when you are finished with this thread and I will tell you a few choice things about my MIL

Twiglett Wed 29-Dec-04 15:19:19

don't any of you realise that the odds are pretty high that you will all be MILs one day

SantaGoesToTheGym Wed 29-Dec-04 15:23:29

Yes and I have two schools to learn from my DM MIL to my DH, he thinks my folks are great and felt that a week over Christmas, of all of us living cheek by jowl wasn't enough.

Or his DM being MIL to me and if I can get to a situation where my DIL actively seeks to spend time with me, like my DH does with my parents then I will know I have done a good job.

SantaGoesToTheGym Wed 29-Dec-04 15:31:47

Sorry Twig

Just read that back and it sounded a touch dictatorial , just touched a nerve.

horseshoe Wed 29-Dec-04 15:40:52

HE HE Santa go ahead and rant.....It makes me feel so much better knowing we all have MIL....

And yes i take great satisfaction from knowing I too will be a MIL one day...a chance to make someone else's life hell

I have been over this with DH time and time again.....he talks to her but not the way I would like him to. Now he thinks im just picking on them because i no longer like them taking her out for the day......of course i dont because last time they drove 100 miles each way and then told me how DD had made a fuss of going in the car seat and so they didn't bother putting her in it......Also had her when she was ill and i told them to call me if she got worse, later found out that she had cried for me for 2 hours and they hadn't bothered calling but instead switched off their phones and dragged her round the Zoo..... They cant be trusted...Im not being overprotective im just asking for them to use car seats and not feed peanuts etc...

Her excuse????? "well they didn't have carseats in my day" WERE CARS EVEN INVENTED BACK IN HER DAY????

tribpot Wed 29-Dec-04 15:59:16

Mine's just left, with her usual lecture about not feeding the baby wheat. (This is a baby which isn't actually born yet). If she carries on like this, I shall be feeding the baby wheat FROM BIRTH just to annoy her!

Seriously regretting not moving away already, fortunately (sort of) I think we will have to when I look for work after the baby's born. Shame as this is a lovely town but there may be upsides in putting some distance between us.

I hereby resolve one day to be a cool MIL and not a bloody nightmare.

Pam70 Thu 30-Dec-04 14:14:56

Please, please, please can I hijack this thread and tell you about my MIL???

On Boxing Day, DD (4 months) was crying because she hadn't had an adequate nap, and we decided to just take her home. Bundled her in the car seat and my BIL said, "Don't worry, I'll rock her for a bit" which he did and she fell asleep again.

Then MIL said to me "Maybe you should leave baby with BIL. He seems to be able take better care of her than you can."

There was a retort on the tip of my tongue and I suppressed it (now wish I hadn't!!!)

This is the same MIL who lives on benefits, bought DS a pair of pyjamas for Xmas and DD a pack of 3 sleepsuits and is now shopping for flights to Australia.

On suggestion of BIL, she is investigating business class flights as she got backdated some benefits she wasn't claiming before.

I said to DH that I thought it was a bit rich people on benefits flying business class and a whole massive row has erupted because I said this about his mother.

Meanwhile, I slog away, paying my higher rate tax (being called a bad mother!) to sub people on benefits contemplating flying business class...

JudgeFlounce Thu 30-Dec-04 14:17:02

Message deleted

Donbean Thu 30-Dec-04 14:45:43

Yes, mines great! Sorry i would love to join in but i cant think of any thing bad to say about her (except she dislikes me!) Even so she is obliging,Adoring, never says any thing that upsets us and is always open to what must seem to her to be strange modern parenting rituals.
I dont know what i would do if i had any of yours. Me bieng me i would have fallen out with them long ago, i just cant keep my mouth shut im afraid.

dancer77 Thu 30-Dec-04 14:46:31

My MIL is generally ok. I do like her but she does do things that really irritate me. She asked what she could get ds for christmas toys or clothes so I said clothes would be good so she got him 2 tracksuits and 2 pairs of pjs. so he still needs clothes! She then asked what can I get him for his birthday? I said well I was going to buy him some trainers but you can get them if you want. so she did then wanted something else to buy him so I said I wasnt to get him a trampoline so she was going to get that. Then boxing day she said I still don't know what to get him for his birthday. I'm not getting him the trampoline because I can't find the one you want and I can't carry it. If she asks me again I don't think i'll be too polite with my answer. I might say clothes because you didn't actually get him clothes for xmas!

dancer77 Thu 30-Dec-04 14:48:49

Oh and she asked what i was getting dh for xmas. When I said a mobile phone she said oh you were lucky I nearly got him one of those. I think she thinks I would have taken it back. I think not!

SantaClausfrau Thu 30-Dec-04 18:00:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas Thu 30-Dec-04 18:02:25

Not a rant about my MIL (I did that before Christmas when I discovered she had given me an ironing board cover for the third year running!) but a question for Hausfrau: are you or dh Australian?

SantaClausfrau Thu 30-Dec-04 18:07:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ItllBeLonelymumThisChristmas Thu 30-Dec-04 18:09:11

Where was dh brought up then? Just being nosey. My dh is Australian BTW and I have experience of the sometimes wierd Oz culture.

SantaClausfrau Thu 30-Dec-04 18:09:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SantaClausfrau Thu 30-Dec-04 18:10:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bighug Thu 30-Dec-04 18:10:32

Horseshoe, i can;t believe your MIL's comments about car seats! It's so irresponsible! They didn't have car seats in her day and so children got injured, (or worse) in accidents. Did she not think how devasted she would feel if something had happened to your DD while in her care?

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