Mums should cook fish pie once a week, wear chanel no 5, translate Russian and only fancy Johnny Depp

[LittleBellatrixLeBoot]

Just an arbitrary list of commandments for mothers.

Add your own if you want. Then tell everyone that if they don't agree, they shouldn't have bothered to have children.

[CrookshanksinJimmyChoos]

Fancy Johnny Depp? Surely the main lust of our lives has to be our darling DH's....the reason for our existence.....the motivation to cook, clean, wash, tidy and never hand the DCs over because after all...it is our job to care for them, minus a dummy of course and never a raised word or cross voice.....

[CrookshanksinJimmyChoos]

cross word or raised voice I mean - DH came in and I was distracted by his mastery and general power......

[PestoMonster]

hehe

[CountTo10]

Ooooo I could do the fancy johhny depp bit - I hate fish pie though!!!

[NoBiggy]

Mums should never "pierce film lid"...

[expatinscotland]

Step off, bitches, Johnny is mine.

[SaintGeorge]

I quite like that list, I can manage 3 out of 4.

I can do No.4 particularly well.

[mummydoit]

I have slept in the same bed as Johnny Depp so I think I can claim him as mine.

[LittleBellatrixLeBoot]

Hmm, I don't like the tone of rational debate you're taking Crookshanks.


You're just supposed to come up with an arbitrary commandment, not try and argue the case for it. It's got to be just because it's right.

Fancying JD is obviously just right. As is fish pie.

[LittleBellatrixLeBoot]

Ooh, the same bed?

Not at the same time, I am guessing?

[CountessDracula]

actually that is pretty much me
that thread title
pmsl

[mummydoit]

Sadly not at the same time . Maybe next time!

[CrookshanksinJimmyChoos]

I can't think of any....

[puffling]

I cooked fish pie aND oNly faNCY jONNY dEPP, THAT'S ALL THOUGH.

[LittleBellatrixLeBoot]

CD wins "virtuous mother" award

I don't translate russian, so am reporting myself to social services first thing on monday morning.

[expatinscotland]

I told you cunts that Johnny was mine! So scram!

[CrookshanksinJimmyChoos]

You forgot Mandarin Chinese...isn't that what we should all be translating for our DC's???

[CountessDracula]

oh ok I did russian A level fro about 2 months (only cos my boyfirend was doing it tbh)
and i do cook fish pies
and fancy johnny depp but not exclusively
And I have only ever worn Chanel no 5 (almost)

[puffling]

My baby speaks in tongues.

[LittleBellatrixLeBoot]

Ah you are toppled from your virtuous pedestal

It has to be exclusive

Dammit, just realised I've gone down another notch

[CountessDracula]

well I am pretty close
face it

[puffling]

My baby invented Morse code whilst in the womb in a previous life.