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OH possible pregnant and worried

(7 Posts)
Sam983 Wed 14-Aug-19 14:42:55

Hi all

Newbie here with a lot in mind.... background is have been together with my wife for 4 years and married for nearly 2. We had a wobble a couple of months ago which is basically down to not seeing enough of each other, something which is now working well again, until the last week or so.
I found messages on her phone to an ex saying she wanted to meet up with him, and when I challenged her she denied it happened, and then proved it fairly comprehensively (with dates and that he said no) and we have now spoken at length about the reasons she did it and many apologies later I can put that aside..... however it now seems that she may be pregnant, as the last period she remembers having was in June, and I am unable to have any more kids due to an accident many years ago which had the same result as a vasectomy - I've been tested a couple of times, although not in last 3 years, and there has been a nil sperm count every time.
Am very worried, because as far as I know I can't have more kids (2 of my own and 3 step kids already), and what with her being caught out trying to arrange a meeting with an ex there is a lot on my mind.....
Any help/advice is much appreciated

mummmy2017 Wed 14-Aug-19 14:51:34

All you can do is stay if you love her and get the tests done when the baby arrives.
Maybe have another test just in case for yourself.
Then you need to think how you feel about your life, do you want to be a father, if it isn't your child?
Does she know the odds on it not being yours?

Sam983 Wed 14-Aug-19 14:58:51

Thanks, I think I will talk to her about the test for me, I would like one done for peace of mind - we have looked at the possibility of it repairing itself like some vasectomy patients have, it's something like a 1 in 2000 chance, but it is a possibility. A pregnancy test is also being bought this afternoon.

As for raising someone else's children, I kind of already am with my step kids, they do have contact with their father, but I'm always around for them. I don't think I can go forward with the relationship if she has gone elsewhere though, I don't think I can get over the loss of trust thing

Sam983 Thu 22-Aug-19 22:14:50

Update for you....

Definitely not pregnant, however I have just found out that this ex has been sending her pics including a dick pic on snapchat.

Still insisting that nothing happened, but I wouldn't send pics like that unless lead on?

Please help, I'm feeling a bit broken

Mumoftwoyoungkids Thu 22-Aug-19 22:23:22

Still insisting that nothing happened, but I wouldn't send pics like that unless lead on?

Sadly (for women but happily for you) a hell of a lot of men seem to think that a dick pic is attractive. Even to complete strangers.

Misskg1982 Thu 22-Aug-19 22:28:49

It could just be nothing, both turning to each other for attention. Which isn't right being in a relationship an all. But I do agree with you, naked pics.... I'd be thinking the same as you. I would defo confront her.
I found pics on my fellas old phone and confronted him. Being an old phone he said they were old etc and I believed him. He then changed his phone again as new one was broken. Had a quick peak before it got sent back and low and behold there they were again. He told me it was nothing just harmless fun and flirting. He now does that harmless fun and flirting, single.

Sam983 Thu 22-Aug-19 22:29:50

I have to add everything now deleted on her phone, no way to back it up....

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