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How to arrange a DIY funeral?

(10 Posts)
fakenamefornow Tue 10-Jan-17 16:40:48

Asking for a friend.

Her husband is dieing. She doesn't have a lot of money to pay for a funeral, but wouldn't be entitled to any state help (does that even exist?) I've heard that you can do a sort of DIY funeral, buying all the different elements yourself, coffin, cars etc. I have no idea how you would go about this though and what parts you are legally allowed to do. He wants to be cremated btw.

Any advice appreciated.

LastYearsUsername Sat 14-Jan-17 22:29:07

It is often cheaper to have an early morning slot at a crematorium. This can be paid directly to the council. If the passing was at a hospital or hospice they might keep the body in their mortuary and allow the doctors examinations to take place there. Ask a friend with a volov or estate car to help transport the body. It can be done for a about 8 hundred pounds.. Cardboard box coffin, doctors fees and crematorium fees etc all add up but some independents will only add a couple of hundred to this and provide chilled storage.

fakenamefornow Sat 14-Jan-17 22:55:47

Thank you for the reply. My friend has asked if I would be willing to act as the celebrant and sort of conduct the service. I'm willing to do this, if it's allowed (never done anything like it before) don't really know what it involves though? Another question if you don't mind. Do you send invitations out to a funeral?

LittleElle80 Sun 15-Jan-17 02:22:01

Oh how awful. I'd be a little wary of asking anyone to transport a body in their personal car - unless they offer, but that's just me.

With invites, I've never had an invitation. It's normally something that you see in the paper or word of mouth.

Is it possible to do a payment plan with the funeral director? Some of them do (my friend did when her dad died).

Also, some of the crematoriums are run by funeral directors so maybe check with your local ones whether they can do a diy.

BTW - what a lovely friend you are.

LittleElle80 Sun 15-Jan-17 02:23:17

Just re read my post. I meant 'how awful' as in its a sad situation to be in. Sorry, I didn't mean to come across as rude.

Redglitter Sun 15-Jan-17 03:41:09

It would probably be worth her speaking to a Funeral Director. They must come across this a lot and will probably be able to help advise her how to keep costs to a minimum. As a PP said you can usually pay them up as opposed to having to pay the bill at once.

post Sun 15-Jan-17 04:26:53

Google Poppy's funerals, she's a bit of a pioneer in supporting families to do this. She's in London but could probably advise you of what to do locally to you.

Noteventhebestdrummer Sun 15-Jan-17 04:31:20

Another idea is not to have a funeral.

Direct cremation is much much cheaper. Cremation is done without a service, you can collect the remains if you wish and hold a celebration of your choice whenever suits. Lots of funeral directors will do it but you have to ask, they don't advertise it much.

pithivier Sun 15-Jan-17 09:31:58

Direct Cremations are usually hundreds rather than thousands. Not all of them allow a celebrant. Sometimes it is just the transporting the body to the crematoriun at the undertakers discretion and time.

I think your friend needs to decide what she wants and then act according to her wishes and budget. She could have the Direct cremation on one date and the Wake with a celebrant at a different venue and on a different day.

We have funerals last year for both my parents. No cars, very basic, but still cost us £2800 each.

BertrandRussell Sun 15-Jan-17 09:34:36

You don't have to have anyone "official" there at all. We didn't with my mum-we just did it ourselves.

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