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feeling like the worlds worst mom!

(9 Posts)
rachealmarie Sat 14-May-16 19:47:35

On Thursday after work me and my little boy decided to play outside, it was lovely so I half filled up a bucket of water to fill his water tray, I nipped inside to grab the sun cream (for about 20 seconds) when I came out my heart stopped as my son was head first in the bucket of water! I pulled him out, cuddled him and made sure he was safe. In hind sight it was such a stupid thing to leave him unattended but I didn't think for one minute something like that would happen. I'm a nursery teacher so risk evaluations and safety come naturally to me. Such a stupid decision! My son is fine he's been checked over and the hospital have reassured me that he was in the water no more than 5 seconds. I just can't stop crying. My poor baby must have been so terrified. I'm beating myself up and my other half is no help. Constantly telling me it is my fault and he has no sympathy and won't reassure me because I didn't think and I should have been watching him. All points I agree with but I'm driving myself insane with all the what ifs and the guilt. I just need some reassurance. I feel like a terrible mother, I live for that little boy and one stupid mistake could have cost me his life has anyone been in a similar situation and have any tips on moving on?

StealthPolarBear Sat 14-May-16 19:49:56

You poor thing. I dobut you'll find anyone on here who hasn't had a similar narrow escape.
I'd tell you mine but I'm just picking one of the many.
hoe old is your little boy?

rachealmarie Sat 14-May-16 19:51:37

He's one and a half! Such a tiny little thing, I've been up every hour of the night since just to make sure he's ok.

GrimmauldPlace Sat 14-May-16 19:51:47

Accidents happen. Don't beat yourself up about it. I have left my children playing with water in the garden before and didn't think anything of it. Your OH sounds like a twat. Ignore him.

StealthPolarBear Sat 14-May-16 19:54:17

These things DO happen. As you know it's not ideal and we should do everything we can to minimise them (as I bet you do at work) but if it hadn't been the water bit would have been somethig else.
don't let the anxiety now eat you up. You're a good parent who had a temporary lapse of your good judgement. Chances were high he WOULDN'T stick his head in the bucket. You were unlucky. Even if he did I'd say chance was on his side that he would be fine and he was. Most of the time, most of us get away with these else the human race would have died out.

StealthPolarBear Sat 14-May-16 19:54:45

I'm not sure if I'm helping or making it worse sorry grin

GrimmauldPlace Sat 14-May-16 19:56:14

Oh and to add my heart stopping 'what if' moment. DD (3) and I were walking down the road playing a stop/start game where I'd tell her to run then stop then run again etc. Got close to the road and I just presumed she'd stop as she always does but she was obviously still in game mode and I hadn't said stop quickly enough. She ran straight in to the road. Luckily no cars were coming or I dread to think how it would have ended. I'm very careful with this 'game' now! I cried for ages that evening imagining what could have happened.

StealthPolarBear Sat 14-May-16 20:00:31

That's really odd! My dc are 8 and 6 and I've not really stressed about road safety for a while yet. They know to stop and they know which roads they're allowed to criss and which they have to wait for me. Today we were at a busy park and they had to cross a section of the car park to reach the other bit of the park. I shouted calmly "stop at the car park" assuming I didn't even need to tell them, then watched on horror as they ran straight across!! I don't know if it was the weird design or what but they just didn't register (or listen to me but nothing new there!). Needless to say they were fine but I was cursing myself.

Also (not read the details) but have you seen the thread about the 2yo regularly left in the care of an 8yo in the park shock

rachealmarie Sat 14-May-16 20:08:38

Thankyou! No you are both definitely helping grinjust glad he's ok. Yea OH is a douche when he wants to be! I suppose I'll have these moments all the way up until he's 60, the what ifs and the accidents.

An 8 yo and a 2yo alone in a park? Jesus Christ

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