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Welcome to the TWATS 2014. Please now list your categories and nominations.

(276 Posts)
MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 11:29:52

Well this is going to cause chaos and probably have no real conclusion to it but I did think that it at least deserves it's own thread.

1.) Please note, this thread is NOT for wenching in. I repeat NO WENCHING. Wenching must continues in the tavern threads only.

2.) NO DISCUSSION OF SANTIAGO AND FOOTBALL. You may nominate him but we don't need 36 pages of "OMGZ I LOVES HIM n his futbowl LOL LOL LOL!!!!111"

3.) Remember when nominating and making up categories that The Cardinal is sexier than any of the other male cast members.

MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 11:44:06

Sexiest character in the history of tv: Cardinal Richelieu

Cast member most likely to get it until he dies: Peter Capaldi

Character who's absence in the next series will mean it won't be back for a 3rd: cardinal Richelieu

Best wearer of cloak: Cardinal Richelieu

Sexiest wearer of the colour black: Cardinal Richelieu

Sexiest wearer of the colour red: Cardinal Richelieu

Character most likely to have had you on a permanent state of arousals since January: Cardinal Richelieu

Character most likely able to fly a TARDIS: Cardinal Richelieu

Most misunderstood character who isn't actually evil, he just wants what's best for his country: Cardinal Richelieu

Cardinal Richelieu's most loyal wench: MalcolmTuckersMistress

Cardinal Richelieu's second most loyal wench after MalcolmTuckersMistress: DrinkFeckArseGirls

MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 12:45:19

Best tumbleweed moment: this thread

Cinnamoncookie Wed 11-Jun-14 12:59:20

Most batshit mental wench : Malc

Cinnamoncookie Wed 11-Jun-14 13:39:51


MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 14:04:51

<throw massive punch at Cinnamon>

Well you'll be here a while before anyone notices you down there!

FolknNorah Wed 11-Jun-14 14:13:30

Most like an insect?

FolknNorah Wed 11-Jun-14 14:22:13

I agree cardinal was the best though. I'll miss him, he was amazing. Just wouldn't. You know?

MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 15:03:18

No I wouldn't either Norah <sarcastic glazing of gaze>

FolknNorah Wed 11-Jun-14 15:33:20

Then we're agreed. We can admire him and his talents, you can lust after him, I can watch take notes keep encouraging you by posting this....
Those of us in a minority perv group should stick togevva.


MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 15:42:04

Ooooof! I'd sell my kidneys and my children's kidneys for him to grab my face and look at me like that.


Oblomov Wed 11-Jun-14 15:55:25

Looks worst in sandals:


Ha ha. Knows MTM will shoot me....

So seriously. Someone post all the TWAT categories. Please.

MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 16:28:26


<headbutts oblomov>

Right which wench is going to come in here next and insult the cardinal? BECAUSE I AM WAITING FOR YOU WITH A BASEBALL BAT WITH NAILS IN IT!

Oblomov Wed 11-Jun-14 16:49:50


HannahHorvath Wed 11-Jun-14 17:10:18

I'm just here admiring the no wenching, that's going on.

HannahHorvath Wed 11-Jun-14 17:15:45

Dodgiest outfit:

Cardinal black puffa jacket and stupid boots he can't walk in.
(Malcolm - PC even said in a vid that Cardinal was a fashion victim, so keep your bat where it is, lub, or I'll jam it in your ballot slot).

Marie de medicicicicicici in black snake rope Star Wars bondage outfit.

Bonnasaire and his twatty jacket.

Treville and his stupid full length coat (does nothing for him) (love the man, hate the coat)

German bloke/King - looked like the King from chitty chitty bang bang.

MadamedeChevreuse Wed 11-Jun-14 17:23:33

Oh my christ!! <pam>

<flails arms futilely>

Can someone with organisational skills compile a list of best CATEGORIES so far? And then we can add nominations??? (*trev*? Have you got this?)

Just to avoid us drowning in a rising tsunami of "best athos breathing / blinking / existing" type categories??

MadamedeChevreuse Wed 11-Jun-14 17:28:59

And we need a limit, probably.

10 musketeers ones, 10 (?) Wench ones?

And it is team members' own responsibility to nominate their objects of desire. NO FUCKIN MOANING!!

Right. <sucks joy out of world with new found project management skills>

Are we having fun now?

Fram Wed 11-Jun-14 17:33:58

Yes- Marie de Medici's bondage dress hmm
I didn't feel that was entirely historically accurate [confusion]

FolknNorah Wed 11-Jun-14 17:38:49

Who the fuck is fram?

And fuck you all. With knobs on. We need actual categories, then an evening to vote. They have to be open ended, so no 'who's the best at leaning in a miserablebeardyfucker stylee?


MalcolmTuckersMistress Wed 11-Jun-14 17:54:08

Do what the fuck you want you fuckers. I'd rather take my chances playing trampolines on a bloated whale on the brink of explosion than hang around here anymore.


FolknNorah Wed 11-Jun-14 17:54:53

I should add, if you're new, welcome <waves> come on over to the other thread, something about swagger inn and no more footballl or something like that.
if you're a name changer - the above still stands. Who the fuck are you?
<narrows eyes>

Sparklegeek Wed 11-Jun-14 17:58:25

At long fucking last. A voice of reason in the wilderness Madame

OMG have never seen such a shower of shite.

<Mind boggles at Fram>

MrsBeeee Wed 11-Jun-14 18:07:41

Best Wench Flounce Off?

That's a hard one to judge grin

FolknNorah Wed 11-Jun-14 18:15:45

<stands in front of door>
Uvver fred nah

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