3 under 3 - has anyone done this?(27 Posts)
A friend of mine is expecting her third child, she's due on her ds1's third birthday, her ds2 will be 16 months. She's happy and it was planned! I'm totally in awe of her bravery, but I do think she's slightly mad.
Has anyone here done something like this?
Not yet! Just had number 2 and DS is 18 months. So far, so good so I was wondering if I might go for another 18 month gap which would be 3 almost under 3.
It'll be interesting to read the responses...
Erm, no i wouldn't be brave enough. My dd was 2yrs & 1mth when i had dd2, and i think that the age gap was too small. The gap between dd2 and ds was 3 years which was alot better for me
I think the question you need to ask yourself is do you want to be crazy with out a break until the youngest reaches school age or do you want to be crazy, have a break and then be crazy? My kids are 3 years apart, and emotionally for them I think that was a great choice. But I do feel like I had this taste of freedom when my daughter was 2-2.5 before I got pregnant, and then I felt like I was slammed with the baby thing again. My good friend's kids are 18 months apart and she had a very hard time when they were babies, but one kid started school one year, and the second the next year. My older daughter is in year one and my younger one won't start school until next year! Also her kids are basically the same age, like the same activites, and can do the same stuff. My 3 year old feels left out a lot of times, and my six year old feels like we do too many "baby things"...
I did the same as you, august - I have 4 kids and the gaps are 3, 3 and 5 - I could only deal with one baby at a time. Big span of crazy years! I have friends who had theirs much closer togather and I know I couldn't have coped with that - beety describes it as "a little hairy" - I should say so!
This will be me! I'm expecting in October, DS1 is currently nearly 3 and dd1 9 months. Hadn't planned to have them so close so interested in anyone else who's done it. My first gap of 2 years 2 months has been fine.
I'll be in this situation too. Third baby due in September when my oldest will have just turned three. I've found coping with two close in age o.k. so I'm hoping three will be alright. Would love to hear some positive stories from others to encourage though.
Friends had a single boy and then twins -- how would you like 3 under 18 months?! Anyway, they've coped, I think they love it, truth be told. They just get on with it.
We had our third when DD1 was 3 and 4 months. It was manic at the time!
I currently have a 4yo, a 2 1/2yo and a 6 week old, 3 in 4 years pretty exactly, I did plan to have 3 in 3 years but my periods never came back until DD2 was almost a year and I had a mc too hence the 2 1/2 age gap between DD2 and 3. I love having them close whilst hard work it is lovely.
I have a friend who last year had twin DDs just turned 3, a 19 month old DD and a newborn DS so 4 3 and under now that is mad.
My DC3 was born 2 weeks before DC1's birthday, with DC2 halfway inbetween - ie 18m gap and 17.5 month gap. Boy, girl, boy. DS2 is getting on for six months now.
It was all planned and I don't regret it. Though we don't plan any more (or not yet at least!). I'm of the school of thought of getting it over with all together, and then they can all grom up together. It seems to be working so far, DS1 and DD get on great.
I find some things easier with 3 than just with 2. For example I go to Tescos with all three, when I don't think I ever did with just two (did online shops, waited for DH to be around etc). DS1 now 3.6 shows DD how to behave and "looks after" her. In GP's surgery for DS2 jabs DS1 would keep enough of an eye on DD and stop her running out the automatic doors, or alert me when she's doing something she shouldn't.
And if I'm honest, I love all the "how do you cope?" comments. Yes they can piss me off in the wrong mood but they are basically compliments, or I choose to think they are anyway.
But now DS1 is 3.6 I can see how much easier a bigger gap would have been. But then the whole thinkg would have gone up much longer. I think it just depends on the person. I prefered to get it all over with.
i did it.
dd1 10 months old when pregnant with ds1. he was only 2 months old when pregnant with dd2. very, very hard work!
I have exactly the same gaps as she will have. DS2 was born 3 days before DS1's 3rd birthday and 16mo after DD.
It was hard but not as hard as I was expecting, in a way. DS1 and Dd get on really well, amuse each other and it made it much easier when ds2 was newborn as they needed me less because they could entertain each other . Now DS2 is 20mo there is quite a big light at the end of the tunnel as DS1 is about to start school and Dd is about to start preschool. Life has been crazy for the last year and a bit but you don't know any different so you just get on with it.
I like the fact that they are all close, they are all into similar activities so we never have to compromise on what we do, they play with the same toys and that they will all be in school together.
The only thing I'm a bit sad about is that they will all be off at school very quickly and I'll have to go back to work . If I'd spaced them out a bit more I'd have had years off!
Olihan, that's exactly how I feel. That maybe if I'd spaced them out a bit more there might have been benefits too. I shall be where you are now this time next year and your talk of "a big light at the end of the tunnel" is very welcome
"it was busy and messy and a blur for a while-but fun"
That's about how it was for us hatrick. I used to congratulate myself on getting out of the door before midday for a while!
The first 6 months of DS' (3rd baby) life were definitely a blur.
I think you do have to be ultra organised wrt going out. There's no impulsive running out of the door, plus you have to have a double buggy, which is a PITA, frankly.
theinsider, life is massively easier these days. Ds1 and dd can dress themselves, put their own shoes on and ds2 just wants to be like them so he's pretty independent compared to ds1 at the same age. We can actually leave the house in under 10 minutes if we absolutely have too .
The downside of them being that close is that they can fight like fury - all 3 of them at times - but they also look out for each other in a very sweet way and are a very tight knit little unit.
"leave the house in under ten minutes"
But I can see the looking out for each other, and being a tight little unit already.
They are all very sweet.
So I'm thinking christmas, then both DS's birthdays in March , summer holidays and this time next year they'll all be off to (pre) school. Love them lots but fab .
I had a 5yo, 2.7yo and 16mo when dc4 born.
Did it all again a few years later with a 3.1yo and 17mo when dc7 born.
I salute anyone who has done the 3 under 3, thing as have been there on purpose! I have 38 month, 21 month and 6 month olds. I still use the same single buggy and also have a double one with big shopping basket. I find it fine as the dc have a constant supply of playmates and entertainment in each other, and we have quiet time when all the noise gets too much and then the older dc do colouring or looking at books and I recover with a cuppa. There was a time I worried I couldnt give each child as much one to one play time or attention but kids are pretty smart, finding time for me to do that anyway.
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