Jimjams - thanks for the link from a parent who has always wondered about autism.

[dejags]

\link{http://www.autismspeaks.org/sponsoredevents/autism_every_day.php\13 minutes}

thanks for this link Jimjams. It answers so many questions I always wondered about but never had the guts to ask.

If only everybody could take the time to watch it.

[PollyLogos]

Thank you for this link. I found the film very moving, it also gave me a visual image to the everyday difficulties that parents of autistic children live with every day and night that I have read about on mn.

I will never forget reading jimjams description of a day out with her family at (I think) a farm. I can honestly say that that changed my attitude to "badly behaved children" for ever. And, I am ashamed to admit thatI have worked for many years with physically disabled children and their families but I still didn't get it 100%.

Everybody should try to take the time out to watch this.

[Cadmum]

Very moving and insightful. Thank you for sharing this link.

[Bouj]

I watched it too. Thanks Jimjams, very moving and heartbreaking. I had always thought of autism from the parents point of view, but my heart broke for the little boy shown.

[Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads]

Say thanks to Davros- she posted it originally! It is an amazing film. I have used every line in it, a lot of the things the mothers say I have said often (except the driving off the bridge bit- but after a shaky start to school we have been lucky enough to access excellent provision and are now in receipt of a lot of official support).

I think it captures life with an autistic child better than anything else I have every seen.

[ruty]

i keep trying to watch this but the volume won't go up and i can barely hear it. Must try to get dh to see if there is anything i can do about the volume.

[Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads]

Can you adjust it on your main computer? I can adjust either on the windows media player bit, or my main computer overall volume control iyswim.

[katierocket]

Wow, that is such a powerful film. I had the same moment as pollylogos describes after reading that infamous description by jimjams and I can say that it really did make me less ready to judge. This would do similar I think.

They should show this to older children in secondary schools (or a version of it) since it's all of society that needs to understand better.

everyone should watch it

[ruty]

the fact that i'm crap with computers doesn't help! will ask dh again tonight.

[QueenOfFaff]

I watched it and was deeply moved. I also feel slightly better educated about autism. Thank you.

[lionhearted]

Maybe a link to that original jimjams post and the description would help some people?

[Pixel]

I've finally managed to watch it on someone else's computer and it was worth the effort. Thanks.

[katierocket]

everyone should watch this

[Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads]

lionhearted I don't thik there is an original post from me, I've been plugging it everywhere :o Davros started a thread in SN originally- called something like short documentary aboutnautim until SUnday (although obviously its there longer).

[fattiemumma]

i swear that film is useing a script written by me!!

i have said each and every line of that film at least 1000 times!

im glad it has raised so much thought about the subject of autism....even if it has casued so much uproar over on the other board.

thank you for posting it.

[MarsLady]

My friend has a son with autism. I never realised quite how exhausted she was until I had the DTs. For me however my exhaustion will soon be alleviated because my DTs are getting bigger and sleeping longer at night. Her exhaustion will not. Her son has been removed from his sn school because they do not have the funding, expertise, capability etc for dealing with his complex needs.

She has my admiration because despite everything she keeps going. Thanks for the link. It more than confirmed what I knew her life was like.

[Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads]

Mars- my best friend (from forever we've known each other since we were 1!) has 4 children- the youngest are twins and our lives were really similar for a couple of years (when her twins were about 2). She really does genuinely understand what it is like. She is an absolute rock and I love her. (and she saw ds3 when he was about 10 minutes old- I ended up with a c0-seciton but she was there for the labour).

[lionhearted]

Sorry Jimjams, I didn't make myself clear. I was thinking of the post that PollyLogos mentions relating to your day out (I thought it might be illuminating to those who haven't managed to see the film).

[MarsLady]

jimjams, I'm glad that your best friend is who she is!

Well done for all that you do to educate people about special needs. I read the threads and don't contribute because there is nothing that I can say and it breaks my heart when people pass ignorant comment.

You have my now spoken admiration and are one of my heros.

[Blossomhill]

lionhearted - what post was that?

[Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads]

oh goodness lionheart- that was years ago (literally). Is search working? If not no chance of finding it!

[Jimjamskeepingoffvaxthreads]

It was on a thread about circumcision! :o!!!

[Blossomhill]

jj - sounds interesting

[soapbox]

I watched it last night when the other thread was kicking off - but was a bit too red misted at that thread to post tbh.

I did find the film searingly honest, but nothing that Jimjams and other's haven't very eloquently said at one time or another on here! It is powerful being hit with it all at once though.

There were a few things that hit me more than others - the bagel lady (in another life), the girl who was totally besotted with her mum, the boy sitting on the window sill - I was deeply moved wondering about what he saw, what he made of the world, and generally I was concerned that some of the children seemed in pain (tone of the crying) constantly, which must be awful to bear if you are their parents:(


I hope I have a much better understanding of autism that I had before MN, and I hope that I understand enough to be empathetic and supportive of those parents with children with autism, in RL and on here. Nevertheless, my overwhelming feeling was 'there but for the grace of god...', a very very self indulgent view point though, but definitely how I felt at the end of it.

[yajorome]

Here tis - post by Jimjams yonks ago:

Right I'm going to leave circumcision for a bit to try and explain why I don't think you should be so judgemental about things you know nothing about.

Picture the scene. You've taken your dd/ds to a miniature pony farm for the day. On the way in you notice a boy- about 3- who appears to be studying the gift shop door handle quite intently. He's kind of in the way of your buggy, but his mother just moves him physically slightly so you can get past. As you move your buggy past he tries to grab it. His mother just says "come away" and he lets go and returns to the door handle. Still his parents just watch him. Then you hear his mother say "come on lets look at the gee gees" and try to walk away with him- he runs back to the door absolutely screaming. Next the father pickes him up and says "gee gees gee gees" and tries to carry him away from the door- he tried to headbutt the father and starts slapping him. Still he isn't told off. You look agaoin after about 10 minutes and he's still there. Soon you have to walk that way again and you hear the mother say "oh look slide" - the boy starts to run- straight for your child- the parent's don't say anything and he swerves out of the way and doesn't hit your child- bit scary though. For the next half hour or so you see him on the slide. Later you see him by the pony trecking - the helper tries to put a hat on him and he starts screaming and hitting his mother. The mother says a few things to the helper, she nods and he gets on the pony without a hat. Later you see the family eating lunch on a picnic table. The little boy won't sit down and appears to be eating crap- plain crisps, raisins and not much else. He has some strange looking jam snadwhiches- they look very dry, but he ignores those. Meanwhile the parents are tucking into - very nice looking helathy sandwiches. They don't off the child any.

So what's your verdict? Spoiled child? Terrible parenting? Talking to him in baby langauge (gee gee)? Letting him get away with it? He;s got them wrapped around his little finger?

Well no- that child was my ds1- apart from the lunch- we don't do lunch in public places unless it's an absolute necessity.

That child is autistic- he finds strange places stressfull and when he's stressed he glues himself to doors. There's no point trying to pull him away as he'll headbutt the concrete. He grabs passing buggies as he's fascinated by them- he does let go when told to though. His language is very delayed (he can say gee gee - he can't say horse). Like many autistic children he can't look and listen- so if I shouted "watch out" as he ran towards your child he would be more likely to bump into him. Again like many autistics he uses peripheral vision a lot which is why he looks as if he's running toward someone- I know he won't hit them. He has extreme tactile sensitivity and just cannot wear hats- we're working on reducing this - not there yet though. And I haven't even gone into the grass issues or the swing issues or whatever other nightmares we have when we try to have a day out. Oh and the apalling lunch and not sitting down- won't sit down as he's in a new place. Has a very very limited diet (I think he eats 10 different things- which isn't actually too limited for autism) and is gluten free - his diet is just about balanced and to be honest I have far bigger things to worry about. We are seeing a nutritionist who understands autism in June thpough (essential the last idiot told me to use star charts durrr).

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Hope it was ok to cut and paste. Didn't really want to resurrect the thread.