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Is it just me who is so antisocial?

(28 Posts)
Flossam Wed 31-May-06 20:41:28

I love having people to visit. I look forward to them coming for ages, I even enjoy preparing for them to come. But I really don't like it when they stay for more than 8/10 hrs, ie, they stay the night. My friend has just left with her little boy having travelled from London to see DS and I. And I couldn't wait for them to leave!! Nothing went as planned, DP who was on nights was disturbed by her biting, pinching hitting DS refusing to behave, and he was nasty to my DS (see above, having a Hunker moment all day - do not harm the child, must not harm the child...). I have wine and choccie and my first evening on MN for absolutely ages. By the end of tonight I will be calm and peace personified. (Deep breath, they are gone, deep breath, they are gone)

tenalady Wed 31-May-06 20:43:38

I like to be in TOTAL control of my get togethers otherwise I feel a bit fed up too. Only problem with that is it is exhausting running around after everyone to make sure they are ok.

NotAnOtter Wed 31-May-06 20:46:30

i just cannot do nights anymore sooo antisocial!

katiebl Wed 31-May-06 20:50:03

I know what you all mean. It's lovely having people around for a few (3 or 4) hours but longer than that and I start to go mad. ITs not that I don't like them but I just want to get on and do my own stuff and get on with things that I can't do while they are around.

Its funny that I spend all my time getting excited about seeing people then after a few hours I just want them to f off.

Chandra Wed 31-May-06 20:53:18

Ahem, I love having people to stay, the longer the better . We have had a couple of friends who stayed with us for 3 m each, it was fantastic, it felt like a party each dinner time.

Chandra Wed 31-May-06 20:54:26

Perhaps I should also mention that I'm the loneliest person in this city?

Piffle Wed 31-May-06 20:55:21

depends on who it is....
I love it, I have no one normally so welcome company

Twiglett Wed 31-May-06 20:56:52

oh god no .. have been invited out tomorrow night to some private member's bar in dean street ... with some old girl friends I used to work with

I don't wanna go

can feel myself saying Hugh is out tbh

Flossam Wed 31-May-06 21:14:38

That is what is just so silly though. I really look forward to seeing them! But then, I think sitting on a beach with two toddlers having a nice chat will be lovely, not anticipating having to go toddler chasing. Hell I even brought them a ball to help them in my efforts. How thick am I?

FrannyandZooey Wed 31-May-06 21:21:59

I love seeing people, and get really bored and lonely if I don't see people, but I tend to struggle if it is longer than a few hours at a time or I feel I can't escape anywhere. It doesn't tend to be a problem in everyday life, and if we are going to spend longer with people I try to just be honest and say "I am a bit weird like this, I will need some time on my own so I will do x y z". I find it is easier since having ds as there is usually some excuse - "he needs a lie down" "I'll just go and feed him / change his nappy" etc.

I found the Myers Briggs personality assessment was interesting in that it defines extroversion / introversion as being where you get your energy from - being with people, or being alone. So an extrovert will feel very enlivened and energised by spending all day with friends and all night at a party, whereas an introvert, although they may have had a great time at the party, will feel exhausted and need to recharge by being alone. I find that helps me to understand myself and not to feel totally odd when it happens - just needing some time alone to get your energy back sounds very reasonable.

WelshBoris Wed 31-May-06 21:25:48

I like being with other people but only to a certain extent

Like Franny I have to have time on my own or I go crazy

Flossam Wed 31-May-06 21:29:33

Although I am sure it isn't him, it is me, I am half convinced that it is her DS who kind of ruined it all for me. He is incredibly demanding, very manipulative made all the worse by his mum, as much as I love her! He is nearly 19months and his bottles are still steralised (yes bottles ) he falls asleep with mummy and milk and puts his fingers down his throat to make himself vomit the moment he dosen't get his way (we are talking 'I want xxx book' no, can't have because we don't have it' and he is making himself retch) and just generally takes over. He settled to bed at 10pm last night. And he is very vicious to my DS, who is going to be sporting a black eye in the morning thanks to this little treasure!! Right, rant over. I'll be on my way! If only I was less hungover from last night I could actually stomach some wine!

FrannyandZooey Wed 31-May-06 21:31:58

I think many of us on here are going to be the same way. I crave company but can't handle other people's physical presence for long periods of time. Hence, life online

WelshBoris Wed 31-May-06 21:34:22

thats excatly what im like franny

another reason why im still happily single, i cant handle the fact of living with someone again

Mercy Wed 31-May-06 21:34:39

Sometimes I hate the thought of socialising (either in my house or elsewhere) and other times I love it and don't like it when it ends.

BUT, I always need to escape to our bedroom for a while afterwards. It could be a few minutes or a couple of hours. It doesn't matter how well I know the person, I feel the same way even with family. I can't cope with a lot of noise/business tbh.

Glad I'm not so weird after all

FrannyandZooey Wed 31-May-06 21:35:47

Bloody weirdos

Flossam Wed 31-May-06 21:37:10

can i come to stay then f&z?

WelshBoris Wed 31-May-06 21:37:38

lets all turn up on frannys doorstep

JackieNo Wed 31-May-06 21:37:53

We had visitors this weekend (Saturday to today), and I found myself sitting on the toilet in our (usually) not very often used en suite a few times and really spinning it out (taking a magazine in with me) because it really felt like a sanctuary.

Piffle Wed 31-May-06 21:38:26

I offered to host a small mn summer bbq and got about 3 responses
Figure I must come across as some loon

FrannyandZooey Wed 31-May-06 21:39:33

<moves house, no forwarding address>

WelshBoris Wed 31-May-06 21:44:12

ill come piffle (piffle packs away bbq locks doors and turns off pc)

NotQuiteCockney Wed 31-May-06 21:46:59

I have always needed about an hour to myself per day. This makes half term slightly fraught, as I end up with two children underfoot all day. Thank goodness they entertain each other, at least some of the time.

Mercy Wed 31-May-06 21:49:20

Sorry, I meant to put wink after my post not a smile

Aero Wed 31-May-06 22:01:32

I'd come piff, if you were closer. I thought of you as we were driving up to Yorkshire last weekend. Must've passed a sign for your part of the world or something.

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