Calling Emetophobes Anonymous

[Ellbell]

Aaargh! Dd2 has just thrown up everywhere. I'll spare you the details - dh is dealing with the aftermath, but I am feeling incredibly nauseous myself and have started compulsive hand-washing and nervous toilet-visiting (sorry). I'm also trying to calculate how long it'll be before I'll know whether dd1 is going to get it - let alone me and/or dh...

I know there's nothing anyone can do (dh is doing what needs doing, bless him). But I know that there are other non-copers-with-sick out there and felt the need to just say AAARGH!

[Ellbell]

PS I feel like such a crap mother for feeling like this. I can't give her a cuddle or anything. I did steel myself and put her in the bath and rinse her hair, but I did it pretty much at arm's length. I wish I was a bit less rubbish with these things....

[foundintranslation]

Oh Ellbell. :( I'm not sure I can be much use here, as I'm not emetophobic and am also just a little bit tipsy atm - but I know a thing or two about compulsive handwashing. Well done for putting her in the bath! You're not a crap mother - so don't think you are.
Just sit and breathe now for a bit, and feel the panic subside. With every new breath fresh air is drowning the nausea. You're over the worst of the anxiety now already. Listen to your heartrate returning to normal. Congratulate yourself on coping. :)
Got your CAT - thank you :) Will reply tomorrow, OK?

[Ellbell]

Thanks FIT... I'm just so glad that dh is here. And poor little dd2... I am calming down slightly, though, but it's just the stupid mental calculations I do to try to work out how long it'll last and who else'll get it... drives me seriously potty... , but also a bit with nausea and too!!!

[Ellbell]

Thanks belgianbun

Was your counselling helpful? Was it specificially related to the emetophobia, or more general? I think I need to do something about this, as it's getting worse. I am quite an anxious person generally (this was discussed on the other recent emetophobia thread), but this is definitely my worst phobia...

[Ellbell]

Crikey belgianbun, that sounds scary and really tough. I'm so glad you got the help you needed with your problems. I am fine on a day-to-day level - I just fall apart when 'sick happens'!

[Ellbell]

Ugh... the primary school must be a nightmare! The funny thing is that I am not normally prissy about germs and things (i.e. not worried about kids getting dirty, not too fussy about hand-washing and so on...). Trying to do some work at the moment, just to take my mind off it... not very successfully, I must say!

[foundintranslation]

I'm still here, Ellbell (slightly tipsier - I never have more than a small glass of wine in the evenings - tonight I'm having 2 small glasses and boy am I feeling it)
Keep at the work (well done!). If you feel ill or the thoughts start racing, stop and consciously breathe deeply for a minute or two.
Do you think CBT would help you? I think it might. I'm no expert (apart from the little matter of being a recovering OCD sufferer...) but dh is a psychologist and I know a few things through him. I'll email you in the morning with a few thoughts.

[Ellbell]

Thanks FIT... The thing is, 99% of the time I don't even think about it... I just blow it up out of all proportion when something happens. Also, thinking about puke really does make me feel sick myself, which makes me feel worse... and the whole thing becomes a vicious circle. I wonder if CBT would make me better able to deal with it (let's face it, no-one likes sick, but most people don't run in the opposite direction shrieking for dh when their child is sick). They wouldn't try to confront me with a bucket of sick, would they? [barf emoticon]

[kickassangel]

sorry to hear about this ellbell. what does dante say about sick? i know how you feel, had to leave a friend's house once when their little boy was sick, and had nightmares about it for a week! i'm much better than i used to be (i.e., i cope if she's sick, but need some sapce afterwards to recover), but still feel my heart racing if she says 'i've got a poorly tummy' - which happens whenever she doesn't want to go to bed! lots of sympathy (btw, told dh i was doing vital research into dante etc & he had to stop playing his game, ended up on here instead - oops )

[Ellbell]

LOL @ 'vital research into Dante'!

No puke in Dante IIRC. Lots of scatological stuff and even some farting - I do amuse my students by saying 'merda' a lot in lessons! (If any of my former students are lurking on here wondering if I am who they think I am, I have now well and truly outed myself!)

Dd2 now seems to be sleeping peacefully. I still feel though.

[foundintranslation]

Doubt they would, Ellbell... sometimes when there is a trigger which is, so to speak, iyswim (e.g. fear of dogs) they might, after weeks and weeks of preparation (pictures of dogs/walk in the park...), get the client to meet/stroke a dog, but I doubt it with something like sick. It will basically be about becoming aware of, then gradually breaking, thought patterns.
They have a graph thing, for example, which shows how in phobias or compulsions the anxiety (when confronted with the trigger/unable to do the ritual) first peaks, then, slowly but surely, falls off. I have found picturing this graph very helpful before.

[Ellbell]

I am picturing a graph right now...! Yes - I can see how understanding what is happening to you would be helpful. I was thinking that a while ago there was a thread in Education from a science teacher (not Martianbishop, I don't think - someone else) about how to make fake sick for science lessons and could picture myself being encouraged to give it a stir. Don't know whether to or !

After saying dd was sleeping peacefully, she just woke up and threw up again. Aaargh! Thanks for all your support. There's a limit to how many times I can say to dh 'I'm sorry, but I really can't cope with it...'!

[foundintranslation]

I'm off to bed now, E (about time too, at 10 to 1 German time!) - hope you manage to get some decent sleep and dd doesn't throw up again. Speak soon :)

[Ellbell]

Night night, FIT. Thanks for listening!

[Ellbell]

Thanks Californifrau (was thinking of you when I posted!) and Belgianbun

Ellbellina is fine today. Think it must have been something she ate (as opposed to a bug) as she has bounced back so quickly.

I feel so unnatural when it happens, as I am normally so cuddly with my kids, but when they are sick I just can't bear to touch them. Poor things!

That's a really good tip about the mints. I'll try that!

Thanks again.

[Ellbell]

Am LOL because that sounds like the kind of strategy I'd come up with. Funny when no-one is about to throw up on you, but eminently sensible if they are! Another good idea which I will adopt.