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im 29 and my uni lecturer bullies me.

(9 Posts)
COLOURmeHAPPY Sat 11-Aug-12 01:09:20

hi all,

im 29 yrs old mother of 3 and my university lecturer bullies me.
when i started about 2 years ago we had this lady leach us. she is an older lady and very wise, and she always used to compliment me. she used to say im clever, promp me to speak in class and always be interested in what i had to say. she would often encourage me to do my best. then something ahppened- and im not quite sure what is what- i cant remeber her changing towards me and cant remember anything that may have made her change towards me. she jus did. im not a confident speaker at all and i often would have something to say but withhold. one day our class was having a heated debate about illuminati and the power in society and on that day i was feelin brave so i spoke... and i personally think it was a very good point what i said and all my other class mates did too- but my lecturer made me look sooo stupid infront of all the class. and this has happened a few times since. ive not spoke in class since she made me look really stupid but ive had to go to her for assignment support and she was really mean. he lessons are always very interesting and she gives food for thought but she is always mentioning 'muslim women' ( i am a practising muslim woman) and she is always talking about islam and using it to air points in not a negative way but its always used as an example when discussing negative things. she often mentions race and class too. we hear alot about her life and her culture and her beliefs and i like that... im just thinking if maybe she has an issue with me being a muslim revert. i recently found out that she has written a book on youth and community and i looked at it and its alot about islam and islamaphobia within society. why is she so interested in this. and in me? why is she so mean to me? i really hope i dont get her as my dissertaion mentor. cuz i will be screwed. any thoughts mumsnetters?

COLOURmeHAPPY Sat 11-Aug-12 01:10:21

oh can i also add that she says hello to every one else when she sees them out of lesson- but she always just looks straight past me like im not there. what is with that?

BrianCoxIsUpTheDuff Sat 11-Aug-12 01:12:16

Is there a student support system, somebody you can speak to about this?

Ultimately you are there to learn and you won't learn if you are worrying about her attitude toward you.

COLOURmeHAPPY Sat 11-Aug-12 01:19:30

thank you for you reply. i was worried no one would. i havent looked into a student support for this. but i KNOW for a fact that she has influence over the whole university. its only a small university and the lecturers chat. u cant trust these systems in place. but if she gets out of hand come spetember- ill gladly go to any support and not give shizz if she knows. (she probably will). i was thinking this year if it carries on i might just face her myslef and ask her personally. but i know shes that manipulating that she'l make me sound like im crazy. she a very very clever and complex woman. my friend recons shes actually dangerous with her power and what she knows. its only 1 more year tho i guess thats a positive smile

BrianCoxIsUpTheDuff Sat 11-Aug-12 01:25:08

She may appear to have power but ultimately there is always somebody you can turn to.

If you approach somebody in confidence, they have no right to then divulge that information to her.

I'm not up to date on the whole university set up, but I know that when I was an NVQ Assessor, there were stringent rules and regulations in place in relation to our Learners. There were also outside support bodies, should a situation like yours arise.

I wish I could think of one of them now but unfortunately baby brain and the early hours are leaving my mind blank!

Just remember, you have a right to be educated by a professional - she has a duty to educate you. It's her job!

Don't take any crap, don't worry about "what if's", if you feel victimised then chances are - you are being victimised.

Good luck.

COLOURmeHAPPY Sat 11-Aug-12 01:26:39

Thank you much! smile

BrianCoxIsUpTheDuff Sat 11-Aug-12 01:31:23

No problem, hope it all works out for you smile

arghhhmiddleage Sat 11-Aug-12 01:32:51

Try reading I'm OK, You're OK by Thomas Harris. It might help you get back on an adult footing when people don't treat you like one. I find this difficult and it has helped. It's a bit of a classic, google it and read the Wikipedia entry smile.

COLOURmeHAPPY Sat 11-Aug-12 01:42:16

wow. just had a look. that looks like a whole lot of psychology to grapple with. will defo give that a go. was looking for a new book to get my teeth into. thank you.

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