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(14 Posts)
tmmy Thu 06-Oct-11 21:50:13

SOOO...I had my eldest at 25. Shortly before this I had quit university.( I started late due to bumming about .) I stayed at home with my son and enjoyed this . I had another baby, and have loved staying at home with my children. However. I feel so useless. I am COMPLETELY unemployable. I am embarassed about being a drop out and cringe when people ask me what I do. I know that being a mum is the hardest job in the world and is undervalued by society...blah blah blah... I would like to be able to have a real job in the grown up world. I HAVE NEVER really worked properly in my life. Before University I was just sort of hanging out doing odd jobs. But nothing with any direction or aim.
Once my baby starts school I am really going to feel it. I am scared of a directionless future, of watching Jeremy Kyle on the TV, plunging into an isolated depression.I will turn 30 this month having never worked. Part of the problem is that I have never had any direction. I have never been able to pin down what I am interested in, what I would LOVE, or even like to do.I am so isolated as I have drifted away from old friends who now have glittering careers, and have not made any real mum friends.
I have been thinking of going back to university and studying to become a social worker.I enjoy working with children and am empathetic. I hope this is a realistic choice for me. I would have to do an access course first. I am scared that I would be unable to handle the pressure, not be up to scratch , fail and have even less self esteem that I have now.I have never managed to complete things well... Advice needed. Especially from people who have gone to university at 30

countydurhamlass Fri 07-Oct-11 16:08:03

i have a few friends (over 30 and over 40) who have recently gone back to uni - its seems to be the "in" thing at the moment, and they are coping very well as well as loving it. i need to work and i am doing a degree through open university.

PippiLongBottom Fri 07-Oct-11 16:42:59

I went to uni at 35. Do I need to be 30 to answer your question?

tallulah Fri 07-Oct-11 17:26:56

I was 30 when I went to uni. I loved it and really appreciated it.

I don't know what the financial side of things is like now for mature students. I continued to work PT throughout my course.

PippiLongBottom Fri 07-Oct-11 17:28:49

You are eligible to answer Tallulah because you are 30.

MrsBranning Fri 07-Oct-11 17:35:41

You are not too old!

I completely changed career - involved going back to uni - at 30 and am now 34 and doing a job I really enjoy. The sky is the limit if you are positive, determined and realistic about the challenges you may face when becoming a 'student-parent'.

Think very carefully about social work, though. It is an extremely rewarding career, but also an intense, demanding and emotionally draining one (I am not a SW but have worked in youth offending, so have some knowledge of the pressures on SWs). I am not trying to put you off, just saying that you need to thoroughly investigate SW as a career - talk to some social workers definitely - before you commit to what is a very rigorous training course and incredibly demanding career.

Good luck.

tmmy Fri 07-Oct-11 17:37:40

PippiLongbottom .Erm . No Just a grown up with responsibilities at home i guess..But any experiences from "mature students " welcome.

How is OU.I imagine it must need strongest commitment, as you are on your own, without class atmosphere and structure

fluffystabby Fri 07-Oct-11 17:42:18

I went at 40, am 41 now (almost 42) and in my 2nd year.

Do I count? Can I answer?

I love love love it even when the lecturerwhohatesme winds me up

It's great to use my brain after too many years of just working.

I can see a future and a career.

I couldn't do the OU I would just MN bum about the house all day

NormanTebbit Fri 07-Oct-11 17:46:42

I am an OU person.

It is great my tutor is at the local RG university, the materials are top notch and there are tutorials, day school and summer schools. You are provided with a timetable and the courses are split into manageable chunks so you know you are supposed to be reading certain chapters at certain times.

However, it is flexible but you have to get your assignments in on time. It is also hard - they mark hard. Also for a career such as social work you may benefit from attending a bricks and mortar university as you will make contacts, your learning will be more structured.

Whatever you decide to do, good luck, I hope you enjoy it.

countydurhamlass Fri 07-Oct-11 17:48:01

OU does require some will power, i do have times when i really cannot be bothered but the good thing is that i get to work and look after my son and still find time to study, it also means that i can take a break after a course, eg i finish my current course in a couple of weeks with an exam and then dont start my next one until february

LapsedPacifist Fri 07-Oct-11 17:49:41

I went to uni last year when I was 49. I love it! grin

I have a friend who is a single parent with 4 kids. She did the access course followed by a degree in Social work and finally qualified last year. I know that she was able to defer modules when she needed to get work to pay bills, and it took her 5 years to complete the course, not 3.

twankie Fri 14-Oct-11 06:07:49

have you thought about a teaching career? If you love working with children?

fraktious Fri 14-Oct-11 06:12:55

The OU do mark hard, much harder than my first degree from a top-ranking RG Uni.

I have to say I am taking my education and professional development more seriously than I did at 20 ad there's a lot to be said for bein a mature student. I'm also forced to maage my time better and I'm now doug something I really want to rather than drifted into.

There are advantages to starting later.

Betelguese Fri 14-Oct-11 18:45:03

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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