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Witty answers when asked...

(48 Posts)
Pincushion22 Fri 30-Nov-12 18:59:02

'so you only have one then?' or 'you just have one then?'

I have never been able to find a good answer to this that doesn't make me sound rude or bitter but that also puts people in their place with their implication that I am somehow 'lacking'!

I chose to have one child and love it so I'm not sad at having one. Some witty answers please!

AKissIsNotAContract Fri 30-Nov-12 19:00:08

We tried for a second but DP kept missing and putting it in the wrong hole.

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud Fri 30-Nov-12 22:15:36

We got it right first time round accompanied by withering look at their unappealing progeny.

Scout19075 Fri 30-Nov-12 23:41:46

Why mess with perfection?

TryDrawingAPicture Sat 01-Dec-12 00:14:33

No? Shit! Where have the others got to?!

Pincushion22 Sat 01-Dec-12 14:22:22

Oh these are great! grin

Hope I have the nerve to use them at some point!

Keep them coming!!

SantasNaughtySack Sat 01-Dec-12 14:26:27

We got a new milkman and I didn't want the kids to have different dads? grin

puds11 Sat 01-Dec-12 14:27:17

'used up all my good genes on this one'

or the honest response for me 'one is more than enough'

puds11 Sat 01-Dec-12 14:27:49

'I like my house the way it is thanks'

goralka Sat 01-Dec-12 14:33:02

'I've got some others in the cupboard at home'

SantasNaughtySack Sat 01-Dec-12 14:35:11

I only had this one in case I ever needed a kidney?

AKissIsNotAContract Sat 01-Dec-12 14:35:51

That's a brilliant one Santas.

breatheslowly Sat 01-Dec-12 14:49:23

I'd probably put on a really smug look and say "there is nothing 'just' about my DD". That is what they are implying. That each time they look at one of their DC they think that that DC is insufficient.

DoIgetastickerforthat Sat 01-Dec-12 14:59:14

Well a second your mean having to have sex again and I'm not some dirty, nympho, whore. Once in a marriage is quite enough.

DoIgetastickerforthat Sat 01-Dec-12 15:00:06

would, not your hmm.

SnowWide Sat 01-Dec-12 15:03:41

Two miscarriages after my first born DD, so puds may be right. I did use up all my good genes. Hmmm....

Oh well, if they were really brilliant genes, cant improve on perfection grin

yellowdomino Sat 01-Dec-12 15:04:20

Wow, you all assume people are implying something negative when they enquire if you have any other children? Why would you think that? Genuine question.

Frontpaw Sat 01-Dec-12 15:04:38

Mind your own sodding business
Oh do fuck off
Id love more but... Waaaaaaahhhhhhh!

Maybe I need a few new ones...

SnowWide Sat 01-Dec-12 15:07:24

Well, the condescending tone /incredulity when asking the question... Really negative.

Followed by "I could never have JUST one, but thats just me..." Aaarrgh!!

Frontpaw Sat 01-Dec-12 15:09:57

Its usually negative! I was once cornered in a toy shop by a nanny I had been on nodding terms with when DS was tiny.

"Only one??? Where are there more? (She is Polish)
No. You must have more. One is not enough. I have only one (but he is a boy, so that is good) and you will be lonely when he is grown up. Have another before it's too late. What are you now, 40, 41, 42? Not too late. Have another." etc etc etc.

But then, mum used to get crass comments about the number of kids in our family (not huuuge amount but higher than average). "How many children? Dont you know how to stop?"

CMOTDibbler Sat 01-Dec-12 15:10:02

Exactly Snow - theres ways that people can say things.

My light brush off is 'well, I couldn't afford the carbon offset for another'

DameFanny Sat 01-Dec-12 15:29:39

Genius responses here grin I particularly like the 'have sex twice?' response

CaroleService Sat 01-Dec-12 15:48:34

"He has an identical twin"

ohcluttergotme Sat 01-Dec-12 15:49:55

I have 10 years between my dd & ds & for years had these comments now have complete strangers asking why such big gap? Arghh so nosy!! Need to try think of some witty comments for this smile

Pincushion22 Sat 01-Dec-12 16:57:21

Absolutely fab answers everyone! You are so great! smile.

I particularly like your reference to the carbon offset CMOT - DH likes to think we are helping the environment grin

Yellowdomino - quite happy to answer your question. Personally I don't mind being asked how many DC I have. What I don't like is when the question is phrased in a certain way with the emphasis on 'just' and 'only' (this is why I put these words in bold in my OP). There is no doubt that if said in this way the implication is that you are somehow lacking, are inferior or have lost out in some way. There are so many positive ways to ask a question - this is definitely not it!

The next problem has always been how to answer it without sounding annoyed or as though you actually did want more DC. This is why I have finally asked for some witty, non-bitter sounding responses smile.

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