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Will your only be lonely this Christmas?

(11 Posts)
RebeccaX Wed 24-Dec-08 09:41:21

Without lots of siblings to play or fight with? Last year it was just the three of us on Xmas Day and it was absolutely blissful - so we're repeating it this year smile. Lots of presents, games and food. So don't go thinking - or let anyone make you feel - that you and your child are missing out on anything because there's just the 3 of you (or 2 if you're a lone parent). You're a family!

Merry Christmas [and who said this topic wouldn't work - we've even got our own tearoom] smile

Gunnerbean Wed 24-Dec-08 11:04:25

My only won't be lonely this Christmas - he never is. He'll have his presents and will wat to play with then both on his own and with us and he'll have ample opportunity to do that.

We have to remember that only children have never had sibligs so don't miss them. We have a tendancy to gauage what they feel , or what we think they feel, or ought to feel, by our own expereinces or expectations.

On christmas afternoon my DS will have his two cousins of a similar age to him over for tea and of course he will be thrilled to see them and spend time with them - I can also tell you that he will be quite glad when they go home too! He gets to enjoy the best of both worlds! Company, and then peace and quiet to do what he wants to do and to have
our undivided attention.

My sister (mum to his two cousins) has in effect had two separate families - with her first mariage she only had one child and then, when he was 12, she remarried and had two more children quite close together. So she has experienced being a mum to an only child for 12 years and then a mum to two children. Based on her own expereinces, she says she can see no disadvantages to having an only child.

She was only saying to me the other day that I don't know how lucky I am to just have one! Her two are always squabbling and her eldest (10) in particular seems to really resent her little 8 year old brother "always being in her face" as she calls it. She's always saying to him "give me some space to breathe!"

I told my sister that I most certainly do know how lucky I am to just have one and count my lucky stars every day!! wink

DontCallMeSantaBaby Sat 27-Dec-08 11:14:39

We had seven on Christmas Day, but it was six adults and DD. I don't think she missed another child at all, although if she thought it out she might realise that if she had a sibling her (paternal) grandparents might have left her alone for five seconds.

I read something elsewhere on the day, which although sad (the woman was missing her parents) cheered me in a way: "I miss those family Christmases. I miss us opening presents together, just the three of us". We had a brief chat, and she said she'd never missed having a sibling, and indeed had really no family near by, and had loved just being the three of them.

And if you're thinking 'ah, but now she's lonely because she's an only with no extended family ...' - her friends rescued her and fed her roast goose. Happy ending.

ahfeckit Sun 28-Dec-08 15:30:46

it's not all bad actually. our DS is 20 months and he is always around people of every age, not just kids so he's great around all walks of life. never had a dull moment this Christmas, with relatives and friends visiting he has had loads of company. and LOTS of toys and books to keep him entertained. I wouldn't say he was lonely.
I agree with others, they don't know any different as to what it's like to have a sibling, because they're onlies.

starbear Sun 28-Dec-08 15:34:45

My Ds is playing now with his Christmas Presents and listening to CBBies on the radio. If he had siblings I'm sure they would be shouting at each other by now. I going to do some laundry now

deanychip Sun 28-Dec-08 15:42:56

mine is. defo.
Each day he has asked me who can come round to play. including Christams day.
have text a pal this afternoon to see if he is free to come and play...no reply so far.
he is very lonely, i feel bad for him. sad

starbear Sun 28-Dec-08 16:08:13

deanychip, I take it all back. I thought Ds (4 yrs) was playing but he's looking at the ceiling pretending that Cbbies radio is on the telly. I'm working tomorrow and I know my DH won't call a chum for him to play with. He has nursery on Tuesday which means he can meet his pals, Wednesday 1/2 day pals again. Might call a friend for a met up but in winter it means you have to entertain an adult as well and can't get on with house work. Might go swimming if I shave my legs and those side bits. Well this means we are going to have to book clubs and join Beavers so we have lots of friends to call.

deanychip Sun 28-Dec-08 16:10:26

Im working tomorow but dh might have a pal round to play although i have given him a shopping list so he will not take 2 of them to Tesco!
Poor ds, wish we could have another sad

starbear Sun 28-Dec-08 16:17:49

deanychip I feel the same but Doc said 'No'. if we had met sooner DH said we might have had three. Ds was touch and go. I find it hard to constantly be phoning friends to make a play date. Oh well it normally gets me out and about making new friends but Christmas holidays are harder as other people are visiting family. I'm going to give in now and put on the telly.

deanychip Sun 28-Dec-08 16:21:18

Star, we have lots of family kids and ds has pals as all of my friends kinda had kids at the same time as me. (we are all in our late 30's now) so they are all roughly the same age between 2-5 years old.
We usually have a houseful of friends, family and children but this Christmas has been unusually quiet for us.
he does feel it.
There is only so much fun a 5 year old can have with 2 olds and the game operation!

starbear Sun 28-Dec-08 16:26:28

Went skating yesterday. It sort of came back to me. Maybe next year around November we will go for lessons and head of to the rinks and show off. Misspent youth in Streatham. DH not happy as it has dodgy reputations. I can hear him singing 'Lions sleeps tonight' How cute! Going to give him a cuddle and watch telly together

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