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Episode 34 - The Tearoom moves to New England

(999 Posts)
beanandspud Sat 22-Sep-12 23:25:15

At this time of year New England is famous for its glorious foliage as billions of leaves change from green to a kaleidoscope of colours. The air is crisp and cool ? perfect for hiking, biking or a drive along back roads, where farm stands are piled high with crunchy apples and orange pumpkins.

Everyone is welcome. There are tea, cakes and wine aplenty so pull up a comfortable chair and join us.

The usual rule applies - no fisticuffs please!

UniS Fri 04-Jan-13 19:34:10

ah yes, school.... seems to have been a long holiday. 7.15am will be a nasty shock on monday, tho I have two practise days this weekend as have bike club and a training ride on sunday.

Yummy treats are much appropriated bean, good idea.

Scout19075 Fri 04-Jan-13 20:02:51

I'm looking forward to Monday -- it means we can go home to normality.

Scout19075 Sat 05-Jan-13 22:26:37

Bloody hell -- nights like tonight I wish I was closer to home so I could give my Mom more practical support, not just IM chat.

beanandspud Sat 05-Jan-13 22:47:06

Is everything ok Scout? Have you got plans to go home again soon?

Have a brew or a wine?

Scout19075 Sat 05-Jan-13 23:10:48

No, no plans unless the inevitable happens. My Grandma has a lot of issues, getting worse as she gets older. She won't give Mom the Power of Attorney she asked for to help her despite desperately needing help. Mom found her on the floor today and she refused to go to the hospital with the EMTs/ambulance service people. The doctor (who she already had an appointment with this morning, which is why Mom was going up -- to take her) didn't even see her but called the ER and said Mom was taking her right away. Hospital thinks she needs a care facility (which Mom's been trying to do for years but G-ma refuses/digs heels in) and tried to find something that caused the fall so they could keep her in and the release her to a facility. Unfortunately after half-a-day and dozens of tests they couldn't find anything so they sent her home where they said to stay until Monday (when a Social Services team is due to visit) and Mom said as she was getting ready to go home G-ma was getting ready to go out despite doctors, nurses and social services workers telling her to stay put in her flat.

Sorry to rant -- the above is the abbreviated version and just a straw in a haystack of issues with my grandmother. At least when I was at home I used to give my mom respite by alternating trips to check on Grandma/take her out or if/when she was with my grandmother help by doing the stuff at home (like make dinner, wash up, do the laundry, etc). My Dad is fab and does a lot of the G-ma visits and the stuff at home but he's fed up, too, especially given how crap she (G-ma) treats all of us in my family (my parents, my siblings, my little family) and has for years. Bless my dad, for years he's given her the benefit of the doubt but the last year he's just fed up of it all.

We didn't see my grandmother during our last visit home. She was spouting nasty things misinformation about my parents and MrScout and playing the "oh no, I'm going to be sick on Thanksgiving" weeks before the day so no one begged her to come. After last year's Toddler-esque tantrum and ruining the day for the other 17 of us there my Mom refused to beg/"force" her to join us. I don't feel bad for not seeing her (she has been toxic for a while and only getting worse and more like her mother/my great-grandmother who I got to know as an adult and was a mean and nasty woman as she gets older) but I feel guilty for not being there to support my mother.

beanandspud Sun 06-Jan-13 11:04:07

(((hugs))) Scout, that sounds tough for your parents and even harder when you are so far away. I'm sure your mum appreciates your support though, even if it is long distance. Sometimes just having someone that understands the situation and that you can have a good, honest moan to is enough to make you feel a bit better.

mistlethrush Sun 06-Jan-13 22:06:24

Hugs Scout. Elderly relatives are always problematic. When they're difficult to deal with it makes it worse... and when they're a long way away and you can't help your parents, makes it worse again.

mistlethrush Tue 08-Jan-13 08:47:08

Mistlechick went to his first cubs meeting last night - having wailed in the morning that he didn't want to go, came home absolutely bouncing. First trip is some sort of chocolate tour (I hope they have sick bags on the coach for on the way back!!!)

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud Tue 08-Jan-13 19:25:34

Sorry, Scout, to hear about your travails with elderly relatives.

Three cheers for MistleCub!

Scout19075 Tue 08-Jan-13 21:46:08

Thanks everyone. Sorry about the whinge. blush

We're finally home -- hurrah! This calls for treats...!

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud Tue 08-Jan-13 21:51:50

Feel free to whinge. It sounds better if you call it letting off steam!

Scout19075 Tue 08-Jan-13 22:05:51


(Get it? Steam....? Gah, I watch/read about/play with too many trains....)

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud Tue 08-Jan-13 22:09:40

Pardon me boys, is that the Chattanooga choo-choo?

Scout19075 Tue 08-Jan-13 22:16:17

Choo Choo is one of SB's favorite new books from Santa.

UniS Tue 08-Jan-13 22:37:45

whooo whooo

<<UniS climbs on board the train meme>>

MT- was MC a beaver or has he gone straight into cubs? Boy is talking about cubs ( in a years time) , but I don't know how it will fit in with all his sport. Or if tehy will have any spaces as teh beaver group is full to bursting with his age group.

mistlethrush Tue 08-Jan-13 22:44:22

He's gone straight into cubs. Very conveniently they do it after school. Whilst this means he misses out meeting people that aren't at school, he does meet those doing other things - and it means I can pick him up at 5.30 on cub nights, and don't have to take him anywhere after school. It just makes it all very convenient. blush

beanandspud Tue 08-Jan-13 22:46:17

Choo Choo!!!

Small Bean had a good first day back today [relief]. He was also incredibly chuffed to get 5/5 on his first ever spelling test [boast].

Scout19075 Tue 08-Jan-13 22:57:44

Well done, Small Bean!

Lots of Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts are done right after school in the US, especially for the younger packs/troops. It doesn't seem to be the done thing here -- at least in this area. Even the Rainbows go home and then back to school for meetings.

All this Scout talk reminds me that I need to find out if Lions is Age 5 as in calendar age or Age 5 as in if you're in kindergarten but not yet five you can still join. The US does once-a-year enrolment and it's at the start of the school year.

I seem to have burnt my finger making dinner earlier. Something hurt but I didn't think about it and now it hurts to type and it hurts to try to get my ring off (I burnt a knuckle). hmm

mistlethrush Wed 09-Jan-13 09:16:04

Feeling more positive today - mc had a major wobble about friends - he said he wasn't playing with anyone because they either played football, match attax or with beyblades and he wasn't good enough to play football and the others were 'boring'. Much soul searching later, we suggested that, even if Beyblades were 'boring' - they are, after all, tops, and there's a limit to what you can do with them - it was probably better to play something 'boring' with his friends than not play with his friends. We've sent off for some - and some jacks, so he has an alternative.

I was subjected to "This ones a 'XXX' with a Y tip and a Z stamina and its better than this one that's an AAA with a Y tip and a C stamina ring and the T tips are better than the R tips unless you're playing in a battle arena.........................................................................." I drifted off at some point... but at least he's happy again! grin

We then had a good violin lesson - at least it was good after I went and reprimanded him for being rude and impolite to his teacher (he was chatting back, not concentrating etc!). He was making a lovely sound though.

Scout19075 Wed 09-Jan-13 20:40:10

Every night before I leave SB's room we talk about what tomorrow is (day of the week) and what clubs/activities/groups we might go to or what we might get up to. Tomorrow is Thursday so it's swimming day. I explained how he'd go swimming with T and M and A and his teacher but that Mommy wasn't going into the pool with him and his friends. I promised that I would be sitting on the side where he could see me and wave to me but that he was going to go swimming with his friends and his teacher and that he needed to make sure he had lots of good sleep so he could listen really well to his teacher. A few minutes after I closed his door (not to the click, though, we just pull it to) I could hear him talking to Bunny telling him "Tomorrow is swimming day. Swimming day with T. No Mommy swimming tomorrow, just SB and T. SB wave to Mommy no Mommy in swimming pool just SB."

Do you think that was him worrying about it or just processing the information?

The last few weeks of term I "challenged" him to listen to the teacher and tell me what we were supposed to do (rather than the other way around) and he did really well. Over the holidays I'd occasionally mention his new "big boy swimming" class but I always made sure to tell him that his BFF was going to be with him and that he'd have the same teacher (the one he's had since Spring 2010).

I guess that on top of the day today (that's another long story I won't bore you with) I'm just a bit worried that maybe he's not really ready for preschool swimming....

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud Thu 10-Jan-13 08:58:59

To me, Scout, that sounds as if he's processing the information and maybe even excited about it. Hope it goes well today.

Scout19075 Thu 10-Jan-13 09:16:32

Thanks, Maud. Yes, he was talking about it this morning in a "I'm still mulling it over" sort of way. He's asked if there's going to be watering cans and waterfalls again (like in the last two classes -- they start each session playing with watering cans, getting wet, etc.). I told him I didn't know but I would ask his teacher for him. I have also agreed to hold Bunny at the side of the pool with me so SB can see him (Bunny rarely goes to the pool and when he does he stays in the locker with the shoes and coats). He seems happy in the knowledge that we'll be at the side and that T will be in the pool with him and his teacher (he needed reassurance the teacher would be in the pool, too).

I've also told him it's okay to be a little bit nervous and a little bit excited and that I think he'll have a great time.

I have a surprise treat of chocolate trains for him after class.

Scout19075 Thu 10-Jan-13 16:54:19

OMG, how cute was SmallBoy at swim class?!?!?! He was nervous but once it was time he embraced it and loved it. He came out of the pool holding his teacher's hand shouting "Mom! I swimmed!"

Poor boy, though.... the class we just left is in the half-an-hour before his new class. When he saw the class do their goodbye song (the same song we've done for nearly three years because we've had the same teacher for AquaBabies and Tiny Tots) he burst into tears "SB have a turn in the swimming pool! Not finished, SB have a turn too!" Once he realized he was getting a turn -- that the little kids were finished and it was his turn to go in as a big boy -- he instantly stopped crying.

They make the kids in the Preschool Toddlers swim class wear swim caps. Hahahahhaha! These teeny little barely-three year olds in their green swim caps..... Hahahahahahah! They were so cute and it made them look so grown up even though they're so little (one of the girls that moved up too is a tiny little dot but she's the oldest of the three that moved together).

I'll admit I got teary poolside, watching SB and his friends go off in their swim caps, following their instructor to the safety poster then into the pool, sitting on the steps, playing and splashing, without any parents. blush

Sorry I've been so whiney about it all....

mistlethrush Thu 10-Jan-13 18:28:28

Scout... you haven't - its been a big step for Small Scout, and that's rubbed off onto you!.

Glad it went so well!

ComeIntoTheGardenMaud Thu 10-Jan-13 18:41:03

I'm glad too that it went so well.

Look, here's Mellors with some celebratory cocktails!

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