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2 yo starts nursery on Monday,I'm v. scared!!

(9 Posts)
Alexandersmummy Sat 22-Sep-07 20:23:20

Hi, my 2 yo DS starts nursery on Monday and I am very scared, it's all I can think about! He's never been away from me before, and although he's only going for 2 mornings a week it will move up to more in the new year.
What I really want is some advice, did your DC settle into it? What should I send with him i.e comforter and/or fav toy? Also feel like a cop out but what do I put in his pack lunch? At home we would have beans on toast etc at lunch.
I know I'm just fretting over sily things but I can't help it!
Any advice would be welcome

wheelybug Sat 22-Sep-07 20:26:29

Am sure he'll be fine. DD has never been away from me before (other than for a couple of hours to grandparents) and she started nursery last week and barely said goodbye to me she found it so exciting. She keeps asking to go on days when she doesn't have it. I have clearly bored her for hte last 2.5 years. Even if he is a little unsettled at first am sure it won't take long.

I put dd's bunny (comforter) in her bag along with a change of clothes and bunny has not been needed.

Can't advise on lunch as dd is only mornings.

Good luck !

milliec Sat 22-Sep-07 20:34:18

Message withdrawn

PeterDuck Sun 23-Sep-07 09:57:19

Message withdrawn

dissle Sun 23-Sep-07 10:11:00

ahhhhh...you WILL CRY, You wil break your heart...BUT

He will have such a good time. he may cry when you go and may take a few weeks to settle but look at the positives:
He will learn a whole new raft of social skills.
he will meet lots of other children and adults.
he will learn how to manage on his own little self for a short period of time.
he will be able to make as much noise and mess as he wants to, cos thats what you do at nursery.
he will make you THE most lovely gorgeous craft work thingies tht you will treasure forever.
he will feel SO proud of his little self at all of the things he has made you.
he will gain a new sense of acomplishment at doing these things.
he may make a freindship there that may last him his whole lifetime.
he will be encouraged and nurtured in a way that you could never offer him alone.
the opportunities are HUGE for him...

AND for YOU,
You will be able to sit and have a cup of tea and toast alone with peace perfect peace.
yo will be absolutely AMAZED at what you can get done in those few short hours.
the time will go so quickly once you have healed your fraankly ripped to shreds heart for leaving him in the first place.

it truly is the right thing to do for him...

ive been there and survived.
my boy never ever was withoutme till play school.

put in his fav soft toy or comforter.
for lunch, a little sandwich and some chopped friut, cut up grapes what ever he likes.

dissle Sun 23-Sep-07 10:13:01

oh and you are POSITIVELY entitled to cry, it is almost compulsory.

beansprout Sun 23-Sep-07 10:15:52

Make sure you have a plan for you to fill the time when he goes. Allowing yourself to sit and worry will make things worse. He will be taking his cue from you, so if you are anxious he will pick up on that and think something bad is happening.
Trust the staff and remember that they are professionals who know how to look after little boys (and their mummys!) in these situations.
Ask if you can call after 30 mins to see if he is ok - you won't be the first!!

Best of luck, I know how hard this is and letting go is never easy but he wil have a fab time. smile

SleeplessInTheStaceym11House Sun 23-Sep-07 10:28:15

my nearly 3yo dd started pre-school two afternoons a week 2 weeks ago, se'd never been away from me!

it was horrible!

we walked in she took her name to velcro it to the wall and said in an indignant voice 'you go home now mummy!' and i was banished!

i cried!

I would say prepare them as much as possible 'You're going to the lovely big boy/girl school/nursery and mummy is going home, then when big boy/girl school/nursery has finished mummy will come back and get you.'

i prepared dd for a few weeks and the ruesults were as above. now 2 weeks in im not even allowed in the door! shock

good luck!

mumofhelen Sun 23-Sep-07 12:54:25

My dd started playgroup when she was 2yr and 1 months old. She went on Monday mornings only at first. Dd had always been at my side - she was breast fed until she was 23 months old and we always did things together. Dd screamed and wailed the place down, to the point I was once asked to take her home at around 10:30am. "She has had enough" said that playgroup leader.

Dd loved the first session for which I stayed on - and she didn't even noticed that I had popped out to the post office for 1/2 hour. The second session the following Monday went well too even though I didn't stay. Third time round was the time I received the phone call. My dd didn't talk at the time, but she does talk a lot now. I asked her about it some time ago now. Dd replied that some of the girls were pinching her, so she pinched back, but got caught and was told off! Anyway, can't do anything about it now. Dd was ill the following sessions and then there were the easter holidays. So when she started in the summer term again, there were yet more tears. I also got her to go on Tuesday mornings and things soon changed. She made a good friend who was 1 year older than dd. This friend Jessica asked her parents if she could go on Monday morning too, which they agreed and dd was very happy. No more tears, screams or wailing. The playgroup did a couple of group photos at the end of term with dd and her friend Jessica with their arms around each others shoulders smilling at the camera. I think this was a sign of things to come, because they were the only ones smilling at the camera and looking happy. The others were turned looking away in one photo and miserable in the other. There was a hiccup with this playgroup - staff changed etc - and Jessica moved on to a school nursery. You'll need to read my other posts for details. Dd now attends a re-opened playgroup on Monday and Tuesday mornings and another nursery on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday mornings in which she started this term at 2 years and 9 months.

My advice: do not just run off when you drop ds off. Say bye, bye, kiss and then run off! Sometimes all lo needs is to get started on an activity. You know that he's OK when you try and help and he turns round and says "go away mummy. I want do it. Mine, it's mine." That's your cue to leave. Sometimes leaving an item, such as your coat helps too. It has to be an item that he knows you cherish and therefore will come back for. Ask him to look after it whilst you pop out. Tell him something along the lines of "you know how important it is for mummy to have her coat, so please take good care of it." dd clung onto my coat when I left although when I came back to pick her up my coat had been shoved in the dressing up box and dd was happily playing outside! Dd has just been toilet trained and is very happy is both her nurseries. Well, at least that's what she tells me.

Do not let him keep a favourite toy in nursery. If another child takes it away and God forbid, they 'loose' it, your ds will be devastated and will associate nursery with the loss of his beloved toy. Name everything. Things do go missing. "Cherokee" clothes you'll probably get back but branded clothes, especially "NEXT" items for some reason go missing. If he is still in nappies, buy the cheapest wipes - a supermarket own brand. At one time I was replacing new packs of Huggies or Pampers wipes every week in her change bag. There's no way she was going through 1 whole pack of wipes in 3 hours! Every week? And there's no point asking the staff where all these wipes have gone to - especially at the mad scramble of dropping off and picking up time.
Lunch boxes: There's no reason why she can't have baked beans. Some lunch boxes have flasks with very wide necks so he could still eat out of the flask using a spoon. Other ideas include: using small individual portions of fruit (bananas) and cheese. Annabel Karmel has loads of great ideas - it's on the mumsnet website.

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