Boy touching other child

[fc9682]

Hi,

A child from my son's nursery told his/her mom that my 3-year old son touched her genitals while both were in the toilet.

His/her mom got furious and challenged the nursery to take serious action. The incident was reported to Ofsted, which is now bringing the allegation to Social Services.

My son is delayed in his development, particularly in his speech, and is potty training over the past few months. We have not seen him doing or trying to do this at home or with any other children, and nursery has not seen it either. Also, with his speech delay, he would not understand if we question him about what happened.

My questions for anyone who might have dealt with a similar situation:

• What can really happen with this case? Could this case go to court? Could my son be forced to leave nursery? Could we be held responsible?
• Can this incident have any impact on his future childcare, for example being granted a school place?

Thanks a lot for any help!

[notsosureaboutthatthough]

Urm he is three years old?! Why would this go to court? And why his/her when you say her after.
Bit of a ramble

[fc9682]

We don't know if it's boy or girl - should have said his/her after too.

That's why I'm seeking advice, we'd like to understand what could effectively happen with my son, from the moment this has left the nursery environment and has escalated to Ofsted, Social Services and Borough.

[RosieEffect]

I wouldn't think that anything will happen to your son. The nursery will likely have to put things in place like more supervision at toilets. I worked at a special needs school where something similar happened with some 9 year olds. Nothing happened with the child but the school got a bollocking for allowing it to happen.

At 3 nobody would think there was any sort of intent, even if he did do it it would have been out of natural curiosity, not out of any suspect intentions. I suppose social services may look into whether your son is showing signs of being abused himself as kids sometimes act out things that have happened to them.

[user1493413286]

I would try not to worry too much; at 3 children are naturally curious and it’s the role of parents and others looking after them to teach them what is ok and what isn’t ok.
I doubt very much that social services will do much and the focus will be on the nursery to make sure children aren’t unsupervised in the toilets.
Nursery might tell the school he goes to but that would be more after you’ve got a place as part of the transition so it shouldn’t effect him getting a place in the first place.

[fc9682]

Thanks a lot @RosieEffect, that's very close to what we are thinking, he surely acted out of natural curiosity. We are just worried because nobody would think there was any sort of intent, but apparently the child's mum thinks there was some, and is taking it very seriously. Thanks again!

[fc9682]

And thanks @user1493413286, this all makes sense, we'll see what we will be told in the next few days. Thanks!

[ukgift2016]

I would say more focus will be on the nursery for allowing the two young children to be alone together in that space of time.

[Contraceptionismyfriend]

If I were you I'd kick off at the nursery for not supervising your child.
My daughter is almost 3. My son strolled into the bathroom while we were in there and went for a wee.
Next thing I hear is
"What is THAT"
And then a "Mummmmmy! Stop her"
As she had gone to grab him.