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Is this okay - was I overreacting?

15 replies

MaltbyMaeve · 19/04/2018 14:58

My DS has been attending a nursery for approx. 6 months since he was 12 months. There have been various niggles with the nursery since the start but recently one of the full time qualified members of staff has left which has made the room my DS is in seem very overstretched. However, a particular issue this morning really upset me for some reason even though it seems really minor.

I took my son in as usual. There were two members of staff (including my son’s key worker) together with the deputy manager stood in one corner of the room discussing a piece of paper. Another member of staff was talking to another parent in the opposite corner. There were no other staff in the room. Eventually my son’s key worker turned around and asked how he was then picked him up and waved goodbye to me. Before I had even gone out of the door she had put my son on the floor without saying a word and turned her back on him and gone back to the group discussing the paper. I nipped down to the pegs to hang up DS’s coat and had to walk back past the room to leave. My son was still sat there by himself being ignored by all the staff. For some reason this really upset me and I wanted to walk back into the room and grab him out. He just looked so alone.

I’d welcome your views on whether I am completely overreacting?

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Tobuyornot99 · 19/04/2018 15:03

If it's an isolated incident I wouldn't worry. Perhaps they were looking at documents for a child who is about to start and has allergies / looking at a memo form head office for e.g.
I doubt they intend to spend the rest of the day looking at the paper, it'll be business as usual within 5 minutes, how can it not be with all those children there!?

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MaltbyMaeve · 19/04/2018 15:59

Thank you for replying! Yes I'm sure you're right.

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user1483387154 · 19/04/2018 16:05

I think you are being over sensitive

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insancerre · 19/04/2018 20:19

Yes, you are over reacting

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ZZZZ1111 · 19/04/2018 20:25

This would annoy me to. I would see if it happens again though, as others said hopefully it was a one off.

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MollyDaydream · 19/04/2018 20:28

Was your son upset?

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Steeley113 · 19/04/2018 20:32

Unless he was crying, you’re completely overreacting

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RidingMyBike · 23/04/2018 11:56

Think probably over-reacting if it was a one off? Something similar happened at DD's Nursery the other week - all the staff in her room seemed occupied in two little huddles. I mentioned it at reception as I left (in a kind of 'has something happened?' sort of way. I knew another staff member had died and thought maybe it was the funeral that day or something. Don't know if anything was said but it hasn't happened since.

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Asmallrole · 23/04/2018 12:03

That would upset me too. You're not paying for him to be ignored. Any essential 'looking at papers' can be done one at a time whilst the others greet and settle the children. I'd have said something.

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MaltbyMaeve · 24/04/2018 10:58

Thank you very much everyone for replying. I really appreciate everyone's views. I do wish I'd gone back into the room and just sat with him until someone was free but hopefully it's just a one off.

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LovingLola · 24/04/2018 11:03

That would upset me too. You're not paying for him to be ignored. Any essential 'looking at papers' can be done one at a time whilst the others greet and settle the children. I'd have said something.

This. If they cannot at least give the appearance of being interested and involved with your child while you are still in the room it does not sound good.
Have you asked them when a replacement will be starting for the person who has left?

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DairyisClosed · 24/04/2018 11:06

But doesn't that happen a lot in nurseries? You can't expect someone to be with your child 100% of the time. Tbh I don't think it would be good for a child anyway.

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LovingLola · 24/04/2018 11:35

But doesn't that happen a lot in nurseries? You can't expect someone to be with your child 100% of the time. Tbh I don't think it would be good for a child anyway.

So it's not good for a very young child to be warmly and affectionately welcomed into a place where he spends hours every day? It's better for him to be just left on the floor unattended? While 3 staff members stand in a corner talking?

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RidingMyBike · 24/04/2018 13:15

I don't expect someone to be with my child all the time but I do expect them to be 'present' when I handover - in case there is something I need to pass on that might affect the day, like, she slept badly or is in a state because we left her doll at home. It helps the staff know what they're dealing with and therefore helps the children

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JassyRadlett · 24/04/2018 13:27

I wouldn’t be impressed, and I’m pretty laid back about nursery stuff. In every room either of my kids has been in, drop off is a really important, child-focused time. They welcome the kids warmly, make sure they’re settled to breakfast or an activity in a group with a staff member.

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