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Toddler settling in...

7 replies

asy83 · 19/08/2016 22:01

My sons been going to nursery from 9 months old, he's been through stages of being unsettled and then being fine. He's just moved up to the next room and is very unsettled, he's just had two weeks off nursery which hasn't helped. The nursery rang today to say the they couldn't do his 2 year assessment because he's too unsettled, she suggested if he's not settled in 4 weeks, maybe we should looks at other nurseries/childminders. Personally I think this would be the worst thing for him as it would really unsettle him. He's managing to eat some of him meals, managed to sleep and is happy enough when I pick him up. Has anybody been in this situation any advice would be very helpful?

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Pikawhoo · 19/08/2016 22:04

That's a really unhelpful thing for them to suggest!

Maybe try asking them, if they think that he would be better with another nursery or childminder, what they think it is about this one that isn't working? That might help get to the root of something they could actually do, or (if not) force them to admit that it's a rubbish suggestion!

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duskonthelawn · 19/08/2016 22:09

So because your DS is feeling a bit unsettled they've suggested you leave?? Hmm
I'd be booking a meeting with the manager and asking what they are going to do to actually help him, as otherwise I'd be taking him somewhere better (and leaving a comment with OFSTED on my way).

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ohidoliketobe · 19/08/2016 22:13

Dreadful on the nursery's part. We've just been through similar wuth DS and our nursery couldn't do enough to help settle him. 4 weeks later and he's back to running straight into the room without so much as a backwards glance! Speak to the manager.

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asy83 · 19/08/2016 22:15

It's totally thrown me and stressed me out. He's going an extra day for the next few weeks. I'm hoping this will help him, I have no idea what I'm going to do if he doesn't settle.

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treetops104 · 19/08/2016 22:39

Really surprised the nursery would suggest that. I've worked in nurseries in the past and I have never known a child not to settle eventually. However, if your child is not happy and the nursery aren't doing anything in particular to help him settle then a new setting may not be an awful idea? Such a stressful situation to be in, I hope it works out for you!

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Dlah · 26/08/2016 22:42

From someone who works in a nursery I'm shocked by this!

Downright ridiculous, so what if they've struggled to complete his 2 year check - they get a few weeks either side to complete it, and even if we couldn't witness something directly at nursery it doesn't mean health visitor will suddenly get concerned, it comes down to communication and parents may verify things they do at home which we may see.

We've had children take months to settle - never easy or nice but it's one of those things, generally find its those who attend less often, but it's about distraction and redirecting attention to their likes and interests.

Concerned this nursery doesn't look or sound capable of supporting your child, that would concern me more than him not settling

Good luck X

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YetAnotherElsa · 30/08/2016 10:11

Hi OP just wondering if things improved for you and your DS in the last couple of weeks?

Mine has just moved up a room after turning 2 and really struggling but previously used to love going into nursery. Any tips on how to help him settle faster?

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