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nursery staff behaviour - does a complaint get you anywhere?

(12 Posts)
tiddlesthetortoise Mon 07-Mar-16 20:14:52

i've encountered utter rudeness from a nursery staff member today (not one who was looking after my child, but from another room)

i picked up my child then came back to the front desk and verbally mentioned this to the nursery manager, but the staff member had obviously run to her in the meantime and given some story about the 'incident', and all the manager could say was something along the lines of 'oh she must have had her reasons'. no attempt at all to listen to what i might have said or apologise (ie. anything i'd have to do when handling a customer complaint in my line of work)

the nursery is part of a chain, so i've just wondering whether, if i can be bothered to put a complaint in writing (and copy it to head office), it will make a blind bit of difference to the way they talk to parents

i pay these people more than a grand a month, more than twelve grand a year, so i kind of expect basic manners from them, as well as childcare

i would use a different nursery but my hands are a bit tied right now, due to the hours i need to cover - though there is one other potential option, and i'm considering it after this)

thanks, if anyone has experience of how you handle this kind of thing - i get the impression the nursery manager will just back up her staff no matter what they say or do, which is really irritating

do they have to put complaints in a file shown to ofsted or anything like that?

TiggyD Mon 07-Mar-16 21:07:44

The chain would probably care a lot if you told them. Memos would be written.

Jesabel Mon 07-Mar-16 21:59:57

In what way was the staff member rude? Head Office might care but Ofsted don't really get involved in customer service issues.

tiddlesthetortoise Mon 07-Mar-16 22:08:01

without giving too much info on here..

basically the nursery staff member did/said something that i think most parents would have found pissed them off considerably at least annoying

what then happened, is i went to pick my daughter up, and came back and tried to speak to the nursery manager on my way out

what then happened, is i got 1-2 words out, before the nursery manager jumped in and defended her staff member (who had obviously gone to her and said something, who knows what, in the meantime)

now i guess what bothers me, is the nursery manager hadn't been there for the incident, didn't listen to me and had already decided that the staff member's version of events was somehow valid, and told me so, and i was then left feeling really angry (and still am)

these people are looking after my child, so i at least want to think that if i try to say i'm unhappy with something they'll listen and not shut me down, i think that's important. i now feel like my only choices are stay and put up with it or move my child to another nursery and disrupt her (and there aren't any other nearby child care providers with the hours i want anyway)

wevecomeonholidaybymistake Mon 07-Mar-16 22:10:54

What did they say? The staff member, not the manager.

chubbymummy Mon 07-Mar-16 22:15:14

Without details of what she said it's impossible to determine if it's you or the nursery staff/manager that's being unreasonable.

Jesabel Mon 07-Mar-16 22:16:16

The most important thing is that your child is happy and well cared for. You're not going to get on with everyone, so I would try not to get too worked up over a nursery nurse saying something annoying.

chubbymummy Mon 07-Mar-16 22:17:34

If you want to make an official complaint then make one but whether you get anywhere or not will depend entirely on whether what was said was reasonable or completely out of order.

YouMakeMyDreams Mon 07-Mar-16 22:21:18

I do think it depends on what was said whether it is worth upsetting the status quo or not. I am aware I can take things very personally so tend to run it by Dh before I act because he is aware I need objective advice is quite happy to tell me I'm being an arse hole when I need it.

TheChimpParadox Mon 07-Mar-16 22:22:18

You may pay a grand a month but the staff get shit pay. People pay their cleaners more than what nursery nurses get.

That being said no need for rudeness but as you won't tell us w hat happened difficult to judge.

I assume that your child is well looked after and no safeguarding concerns. Sometimes people have had enough and sometimes snap or act not n the most appropriate way. As long as it wasn't towards the children I would just leave it.

insancerre Tue 08-Mar-16 18:31:57

I'm a nursery manager so I may be able to help, but I would need to know what the staff member said or did that you considered rude

Kerchoff Mon 14-Mar-16 09:23:05

[quote]Without details of what she said it's impossible to determine if it's you or the nursery staff/manager that's being unreasonable.[/quote]

I agree entirely.

If the words spoken had reasonable and genuine implications for the standards of care for your child, or others, then you might consider a referral to the Care Commission, or whatever authority currently looks after standards. Whether or not you should complain to the provider first is a matter of severity of the circumstances, which you should assess objectively.

Of course, if relations between you and the provider break down, even if your complaint is upheld, things are unlikely to prove satisfactory in the future.

As a practical example, I was also spoken to rudely and angrily about money alleged to be owed to the provider. I was even told to remove my children there and then. On complaining, malicious allegations against me were then made.

I made an immediate referral to the Welsh care standards authority, who made an unannounced inspection within 48 hours. My complaint was fully upheld, the provider's own care staff proved the malicious complaints to be such, and significant management changes had to be implemented (because a husband and wife could not/would not see their private relationship could impact severely on the running of a business. Tsch!) We removed our children from the provider very shortly thereafter, all the same.

So, sometimes, it is worth complaining. The judgement call is just when you should not.

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