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is there any evidence that going to nursery helps a child

(46 Posts)
feb14mum Tue 21-Jul-15 19:58:38

were looking at nursery for our daughter who is 18 months. We've had some quotes and we think their rather expensive.
We want to know what the benefits are of getting her into a nursery she would only be going for one morning a week.

At the moment husband works mon -friday and I look after her . I work sat and Sunday and he has her. It does seem silly to waste money on the nursery when he is available to have her. If we decide to put her in I would change my shifts so the morning she goes in example Wednesday I would go to work which then gives me a day off at weekend for our family time which at the moment we don't get any off only on evenings when he's home from work for few hours. plus I think it will do her good to have a break from bring wiwith me constantly.

I'm really in two minds about putting her In I think it will do her social skills good but can I justify the money for it when we have just bought a house and needs work doing on it ect. its her speech mainly will it improve that. will she gain more confidence. will she be a bit more out there as although she's not shy she always seems to be the one sitting back in things and waits for other kids to get their toys and things like that. I do currently take her to 2-3 playgroup and activy sessions a week so we do get social skills ffrom them but she always has me near.

is your child in nursery have you noticed a difference. I'm wanting something I can read and show to my husband that yes it will make a difference

WhyStannisWhy Tue 21-Jul-15 20:01:30

DD has been in nursery since she was 5 months old. She is so sociable, very bright because she's been watching the slightly older babies do everything so she's developed quickly, she loves being around people and has very little stranger or separation anxiety. She's 15 months old now.

TravellingToad Tue 21-Jul-15 20:06:54

I believe it's actually the opposite (in terms of 'studies'). They've shown that under the age of 3 children do better with the one-to-one home environment (whether that's nanny, parents, relative or child minder). If the child comes from a disadvantaged background then a nursery is better. Ie if home life is shit. But for your normal family then nursery hasn't been shown to benefit a child until 3yrs

TiggyD Tue 21-Jul-15 20:11:04

If you don't need to use a nursery, I wouldn't. I agree with over 3s benefiting, but not under. And I'm a nursery nurse.

CPtart Tue 21-Jul-15 20:11:25

Both my DS thrived at nursery, but went part time from being a few months old, so before separation anxiety kicked in. Personally I think it's important for even young DC to learn to be away from the primary carers and learn they will come back, but you will find other who argue the opposite. It's all a very personal choice.
What I would say however, is that you may struggle to find a nursery to take a child for only one day a week. A week is an age for an 18 month old and not conducive to continuity.

PandaMummyofOne Tue 21-Jul-15 20:14:05

DS has been in nursery since he was 3 months old. He is now a very bright, very sociable, very confident little boy.

Our friends DS is 3 weeks older than my DS and doesn't go to nursery. The difference is there for all to see. He is shyer, and not quite as sociable with other children, but brilliant with adults. But you must do what is right for your family and more importantly your DD. Can you put her in for a couple of mornings to give her the benefits but at a reduced cost?

TravellingToad Tue 21-Jul-15 20:15:08

Before I'm pounced on I should clarify that I'm sure nursery doesn't HALM babies and parents who have to work and use them shouldn't feel in the tiniest bit guilty!! But if you don't have to, then I think most people would agree it would be the worse option for an 18m if the alternative is at home with dad.

WhyStannisWhy Tue 21-Jul-15 20:15:48

(And DD has a great home life so the benefits are nothing to do with nursery being better than home for her).

TravellingToad Tue 21-Jul-15 20:16:46

Panda my DS is at nursery and is painfully shy. It comes down to personality not nursery/what cartoon they watch/the colour of their hair/or anything else arbitrary.

feb14mum Tue 21-Jul-15 20:20:22

all 3 of our local nursery's will take her for one morning a week.
We can't do any more than that as can't afford It and we don't qualify for help aas we earn more than 16k a year however at the age of 3 she gets 15 hours free but every child is entitled to that

Velociraptor Tue 21-Jul-15 20:21:36

I'm not convinced going to nursery one day a week will make much difference to her. That said, I think having a day together at the weekend would be a big benefit to you as a family. For that reason, in your shoes I would do it.

TravellingToad Tue 21-Jul-15 20:21:48

www.theguardian.com/society/2005/oct/02/childrensservices.familyandrelationships

"One of the longest and most detailed studies of UK childcare has concluded that young children who are looked after by their mothers do significantly better in developmental tests than those cared for in nurseries"

"It found babies and toddlers fared worst when they were given group nursery care."

"The study does not mean every child in a large nursery will become a monster. Nevertheless, it shows a small but significant difference in a large group of children.'

Alanna1 Tue 21-Jul-15 20:23:04

I think it depends on your child, you and the nursery. My children are in a Montessori nursery part-time, with my mother part of the week, and with a nanny part of the week. I think overall the balance is great. They are 2 and 4. The nursery provides a stimulating environment (there is no TV!) but sometimes I feel it is a little strict. However, children really like structure and they love seeing their friends - especially the older one, but the younger one too gets a lot out of the arts and crafts, the books, and the playing. They also adore their days with their nanny and grandmother, where they do some fab classes, have lots of time in the park, and have a more relaxed time (and yes, some TV). I think like many things with children, balance and moderation are great.

Littlefish Tue 21-Jul-15 20:26:35

I really wouldn't send your dd for one morning a week. It's not long enough for her to make any relationships, or get used to being away from you. For these reasons, at the nursery where I work, we don't take children for anything less than 2, half days a week.

RobotHamster Tue 21-Jul-15 20:26:50

She might find it a bit hard to settle if only going one day a week. One of mine was fine with it, the other got very clingy and it took a long time for him to settle there. Unfortunately didn't have a choice though, had to work.

I'd leave it for a while, if you don't need to do it.

applecatchers36 Tue 21-Jul-15 20:29:19

My DD has been at nursery for two days, since 11 months, now 19 months. For us we have seen her massively develop since starting. She has built attachments with her key worker & other staff. She loves interacting with other children ( today when I picked her up she was playing a racing/ running game with other tots in her class). The nursery provide activities that I wouldn't at home such as messy play, soft play, water play. Her language skills are really coming on. She seems so happy to go on her days & like why her home life is good being at home with either her Dad or I & we do lots of group activities with her. I think for us it is recognising that nursery gives her things we couldn't at home. The nursery is fantastic and give you a lot of feedback, we love hearing about her days apart from us & a different perspective from the early years staff who care for her.

MrsExcited Tue 21-Jul-15 21:29:25

I would do it, simply as it will enable you to have a little more "family" time. I think the benefits out weigh the negatives.

Chchchchanging Tue 21-Jul-15 21:36:13

Our nursery is run by an ex pead nurse practitioner and lecturer. She is an advocate of 2days plus pref consecutive otherwise it's not routine it's more anomaly for the child. The nursery is full so not a ploy for extra days!

rallytog1 Wed 22-Jul-15 13:04:41

I think the biggest benefit at this age will be that it gives you time together as a family. For that alone, I'd say it's worth it.

Fwiw I'm a firm believer that nursery really does benefit a lot of children. I think it depends on the child and their home life but my dd has been going to nursery since she was 9mo and I can't get over how much she learns there, and how happy she is.

notsoloosewoman Wed 22-Jul-15 13:34:27

DD went to nursery from 18 months onwards as she was a shy only child and I felt that mixing with with others would be beneficial which it was. I also believe it helped with her skills like potty training as she had seen the other children and wanted to copy them and learnt how to share etc.

My DD did however go full time and I am unsure whether your DD going one day a week would be as beneficial.

whyhasmyheadgonenumb Wed 22-Jul-15 13:40:58

My DS went to a childminder from 7 weeks, never a problem. Put him in nursery at 18 months for 1 day a week to 'enhance his social skills' and he screamed the place down.
He now does 1 day with childminder and 1 at a day nursery 8-6. No tears with childminder, lots at nursery.
Can you use a childminder instead until she is a bit older? Mine is worth her weight in gold, she will have both my DC at short notice (if she has space) and has had them overnight before.

PisforPeter Wed 22-Jul-15 13:44:25

I wouldn't bother if you don't need childcare. Wait until she turns 3 and gets her free 15 hours x

There is evidence good nurserieshelp children from disadvantaged homes, no conclusive evidence it helps children under 3 who are not living in poverty amd have a well educated and involved parent carer at home.

Lottapianos Wed 22-Jul-15 13:45:41

OP, she's 18 months old. She does not need a break from you - you're her parents. As other posters have said, there is evidence that spending as much time as possible with primary carers absolutely does benefit children. One session a week would be very unsettling for her, she would have to get used to the whole situation all over again every single week.

'I do currently take her to 2-3 playgroup and activy sessions a week so we do get social skills ffrom them but she always has me near. '

That's exactly what I would expect from an 18 month old - to want to be near their familiar adult at all times in an unfamiliar group (I'm an Early Years SLT). Nothing unusual about that at all. I would recommend sticking with playgroups and Children's Centre groups for now, unless you need childcare for work reasons.

Thurlow Wed 22-Jul-15 13:46:58

Hmm. Now I do think that the pay-off of getting that day back as a family will be huge, and really worth considering just for that alone.

Personally I think it does children good to learn to mix with other children and be in some form of childcare. I know a log of SAHM's who put their DC in one day a week from around 18m as they felt it was beneficial to everyone.

Having said that, one morning a week would probably seem, as another poster has pointed out, an anomaly rather than a routine to your DC, and it might be harder for them to settle in.

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