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Complaining about Sons Nursery Manager?? - sorry for the rambling!

(22 Posts)
HannahT2013 Tue 05-Nov-13 12:11:38

My 3 year old son started nursery in September, it has been a struggle on the two days he attends getting him to go, he has been crying and really not wanting to go as he doesn't think I'm going to pick him up. His key worker is amazing and does him a sticker chart so he knows once he has 5 stickers I will be there to collect him.
Yesterday I went to collect him and the external door was unlocked so I waited for him in the cloakroom (as the internal door is locked) The nursery manager was reading them a story and I could hear a child really sobbing, the manager stopped reading and said "stop crying right now otherwise I will not unlock that door and you won't be going home", When the manager finally unlocked the door she was shocked to see us standing there and even said she thought the external door was locked. When I went in it was my son who was crying, he was clearly very unwell, raging temperature and had the shivers. The manager said he had been like it all day. I couldn't even look at her because I knew I would start shouting and couldn't do that in front of all the other children. On the way home he was sick in the car.
I do not want my son to go back but should I also put in a complaint or just leave quietly?

solveproblem Tue 05-Nov-13 12:13:27

You need to report this to ofsted!

PeterParkerSays Tue 05-Nov-13 12:18:09

What a horrible thing for that woman to say - there's no way a 3 year old would know she wasn't being serious. do not take him back, tell them why, and report to Ofsted.

your poor little boy sad

oh, and their security needs tightening up if outside doors aren't locked but they think they are.

gintastic Tue 05-Nov-13 12:18:37

I am hard to offend, but I would go ballistic at that. What a horrendous thing to say to a child who is obviously unwell. Is there someone higher than the manager to complain to? If not, straight to OFSTED.

My DS is secure and happy at preschool but would be so distressed by someone saying that to him, especially if he was not well and just wanted mummy.

gintastic Tue 05-Nov-13 12:19:48

And if he had been like that all day, WTF did they not call you? No way would I expect my ill child to be kept at nursery all day.

HannahT2013 Tue 05-Nov-13 12:25:15

Thank you for your quick replies. I too don't understand why they didn't phone me. I'm so annoyed because it was clear he was very unwell. Plus he worries about being picked up so to threaten him with it is really upsetting. Thanks again.

breatheslowly Tue 05-Nov-13 12:26:49

I agree with the above. Don't send him back and make sure you aren't out of pocket. Report to Ofsted.

choceyes Tue 05-Nov-13 12:27:46

What a horrible thing to say. Ofcourse report her.
And why didn't they let you know he was unwell?

bundaberg Tue 05-Nov-13 12:29:46

That's horrendous! Does the manager own it? If not I'd be writing to the owners to complain.
And definitely to Ofsted too

rockybalBOOOOa Tue 05-Nov-13 12:36:50

Report to Ofsted and do not send him back if at all possible. She sounds hideous. You say 'we' went in the external door, who was with you? Verification of what happened from another parent would help I think. Hideous woman. You did well not to lose your rag.

FossilMum Tue 05-Nov-13 12:37:36

Write to OFSTED, write to the manager's boss (if any).
And complain directly to manager to say you're withdrawing him and why.
Don't send him back, and don't pay for any further sessions he hasn't yet attended, even if they officially have some notice period.
So sorry you and your son have been through this.

HannahT2013 Tue 05-Nov-13 12:43:21

I was with my father in law who fortunately works within the education system and he too was disgusted with what she said. There was another mum waiting with us who heard and even commented "ah bless them". If I had have known it was my son before the door was unlocked I think I would have broken the door down.

HSMMaCM Tue 05-Nov-13 13:13:24

If you do write a complaint, make sure you say how great his key worker has been.

FossilMum Tue 05-Nov-13 14:40:23

Um, it isn't located in Yorkshire with the initials GM is it? [past bad experience slightly similar to yours!]

ShreddedHoops Tue 05-Nov-13 14:57:19

shock Horrible cow bag witch of a woman! Am angry and upset on your behalf just reading this! Please get your fil advice if appropriate, and get both your son, and witch, out of there ASAP.

Gileswithachainsaw Tue 05-Nov-13 15:01:17

Good grief. Definitely complain and report to ofsted.

Your poor Ds why didn't they call you if he was poorly sad

insancerre Tue 05-Nov-13 17:34:16

That is truly awful behaviour.
I work in a nursery and would be appalled if one of my colleagues spoke like that to a child.
You really need to complain about this.
There are a couple of ways you can go about it.
First you can complain straight to OFSTED or you can complain in writing to the owner of the nursery.
They have to by law have a complaints proceedure which they have to tell you about if you ask.
A written complaint will normally trigger an internal investigation and they havr to give you a timescale when they will report back to you.
I take it you want to withdraw your son immediately without notice?
Then you need to put that in the letter of complaint too.
Write down everything in the letter that you have told us, and try to get a witness statement from the other parent if you can.
Next, find another nursery.

BlackberrySeason Tue 05-Nov-13 17:48:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Handbagsonnhold Tue 05-Nov-13 17:58:59

Absolutely it a private nursery? If so speak to the owner and report to Ofsted. Write everything down now so it's fresh in your memory. Good luck x

Handbagsonnhold Tue 05-Nov-13 17:58:59

Absolutely it a private nursery? If so speak to the owner and report to Ofsted. Write everything down now so it's fresh in your memory. Good luck x

hardboiledpossum Fri 08-Nov-13 18:02:55

remove your son and complain to ofsted but be prepared that ofsted probably won't do anything about it.

TinyTear Thu 14-Nov-13 15:21:03

that is terrible. if my DD is even a wee bit warm they check the temp and let me know and give calpol if over 38...

that would have led me to take her away straight away

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