not changing nappy at nursery

[purplefeet]

DS has just turned 3. He is at nursery 2 days a week. Has been there for one year in the Toddler room and has just moved up to pre-school.

He is still in nappies (tried very hard to get him potty trained but it's not happened yet)

Anyway I felt the nursery was putting me under pressure to get him potty trained before he started in the pre-school room.

Though when I spoke to the ladies who actually work in the pre-school room they said it wasn't a problem and they'd do all they could to help us with the training.

He went to nursery today. DH and I dropped him off about 7:30 am. DH picked him up about 4pm - got him home and discovered he was still wearing the same nappy we put him in before he went to nursery! With poo in.

DH phoned the nursery manager to complain and she was apologetic and said it was bad communication because DS has only just moved up to pre-school and the people in there didn't realise he was wearing a nappy.

Did they not notice then that he didn't go near a potty or toilet all day??

I am absolutely furious and not sure what to do next. It's a national nursery. I'm debating phoning head office on monday.

DS very happy at nursery, don't really want to find a new one as he doesn't like change and has settled really well into the preschool.

Has anyone else been in this situation and what did you do?

[MaryMotherOfCheeses]

tbh, having complained to the manager today, I'd wait and see if things improve next week. If you phone head office on Monday, they'll say "yes that's awful, we're really sorry, but has it happened again?" A mistake has been made, they have apologised and explained and I would completely expect them not to do the same thing again.

[bumpybecky]

I had a problem with dd1 not being changed at nursery, but she was much younger (about a year) and was only there half days. My ds is just 3 and in preschool for a couple of sessions a week and is still in nappies. At his preschool they have set times to change the children still in nappies and will change them sooner if they discover poo.

I wouldn't call head office now, but wait and see how things go from now. I think you need to speak face to face with the manager or deputy next week. Ask about what the schedule is in the preschool. They will have had other children in nappies, and should have a policy for dealing with it. Something like all children not potty / toilet trained should be checked and changed if needed every hour / two hours. There might also be some kind of record to show who was changed when and by whom. If the room manager is checking they should then notice if your ds hasn't had his name on the record sheet and get him changed.

I wouldn't be entirely surprised that they've not noticed that he's not been on a potty / toilet if the room is quite busy and there are several staff members. They tend to let them fend for themselves a bit as they get older and let them sort themselves out in the toilet area. Someone will be dealing with potty emptying and (hopefully!) hand washing, but if your ds didn't go into the toilet area, he wouldn't have been helped.

Also though you might be surprised how long your ds can be dry for. Mine went over 4 hours in the day last week without weeing. I think he is ready to start training, but he's refusing! It might be that your ds was checked a couple of times but was dry. It might also mean he's not drinking a lot...

In the mean time I'd use a different brand of nappies at home than you do at preschool that way you'll know if it happens again. Hopefully they'll be more careful in future :)

[purplefeet]

Thanks.

It's not the first time I've had problems with this nursery - about other things and would have found a new place had ds not been about to move to the pre-school. Other friends who've used this nursery have taken their children out from the toddler rooms.

Though I'd heard lots about the pre school rooms being fabulous.

Going to put my concerns in writing and arrange a meeting. Want to know what their policy is and what they are going to do to prevent it happening again.

dh said the nappy was really full and stank. We use a different brand from them anyway. I'd be very surprised if ds was the only child aged 3 there who wasn't yet potty trained.

bumpybecky - my ds is also refusing to use the potty or toilet and cries if we put him in pants! Hoping to have another go at training next week.

[mummysweeangel]

Purplefeet- so sorry to hear about your LO !! that was absolutely shocking (but no isolated UNFORTUNATELY)

I dont care what excuses people make or if they dont make that same mistake again- point is they made the mistake all ready and thats bad enough- they clearly werent paying your child enough attention that day and there is just absolutely no justification on leaving a child in a dirty nappy all day long !!! its plain wrong and thats all there is to it. There is no two ways about that.

I think us parents need to get to the bottom of these type of problems right away as we pay good money for childcare and at the end of the day we are leaving the most important wee people in the world to us with nurseries/childminders in the hope that they look after them properly, its a stressfull enough time as it is leaving children with strangers to go back to work.

Hope everything gets addressed and dealt with promplty purplefeet- and if you have had problems with this same nursery before then i would seriously consider removing your child- easier said that done when theres new childcare to sort out and time off at work to arrange and new settling in periods- believe me- i have been there and its not easy. Best thing i did was remove my DS from a nursery that i had issues with and had them investigated by the care commission. Sometimes this gives them the shake up that they need !!

Good luck !

[cinpin]

I would complain to head office. This is neglect.