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should they have told me?

(10 Posts)
weepootle Sun 21-Nov-10 22:25:02

Dd2 (22m) only goes to nursery once a week for 3 hours. When I picked her up on Friday she was wearing her spare clothes and her keyworker said "she took a tumble outside".

I thought nothing of it until I took I went to put her dirty clothes in the wash and saw the state they were in- they were absolutely filthy. It looked like she'd fallen quite hard and rolled around.

I said to her "did you have a fall at nursery?" and she replied "no, <boy's name> push me" and told me she was crying.

My immediate reaction was to feel annoyed that I'd been lied to. I do think the keyworker should have told me she'd been pushed over. Obviously I wouldn't expect them to tell me who did (dd2 can do that!) but I feel irritated at being lied to.

I want to mention it next week but not sure it's worth it when she only goes for such a short time per week. Should I just forget it?

fedupofnamechanging Sun 21-Nov-10 22:31:11

Yes, they should have told you. You should be kept informed about everything of significance that happens to your child during the day.

I would pop in on monday and tell them that your DD has said that this boy pushed her over, and judging from the state of her clothes it looks like she was hurt. Tell them you want the situation monitored and that you want to be kept informed. That you would prefer to hear about these things from the keyworker rather than have to rely on your DD to give you accurate information.

weepootle Sun 21-Nov-10 22:33:32

Thanks Karma, I wasn't sure if I was overreacting.

cookielove Mon 22-Nov-10 17:14:14

Just a quick note, it maybe a case of that she actually did fall over and maybe roll around in the mud, we have had many children say x pushed me, x hit me e.t.c and parents come in and say why didn't you tell us e.t.c when actually they x wasn't in on that day, or x was playing in the oppisite side of the garden when you fell. Children often pick up on a certain name and will often blame x for many things hep or she didn't do.

And with all that said, he may well of pushed her over, and the key worker missed it and saw her on the floor, and we can't tell you at things we don't see.

But do go in and talk to the manager or key worker, if you are overly concerned.

weepootle Mon 22-Nov-10 17:55:47

Thanks cookie, if it was any other name I'd think twice but the boy who did it spends his whole time pushing the other children so I do believe her. Will have a quick word with the staff and not make too much of it.

cookielove Mon 22-Nov-10 18:01:51

Ok not to go on about my point, but the child's name that they usually pick on is that of the 'naughty' child. We had an Ben a while ago who was forever pushing, and hitting, bitting e.t.c and he was always blamed for everything even if he didn't do it.

So all in all he most likely did do it, but then he might not of.

Sorry i know i seem like i am dragging out the point, but because i didn't mention it is usually the naughty name that is blamed i would thought i would point that out.

<note Ben's named was changed for confidentiality reasons> grin

Probably a good idea to mention it but not to make to big a deal.

weepootle Mon 22-Nov-10 18:25:47

lol- you've named my guilty boy!

purepurple Mon 22-Nov-10 19:16:21

Cookielove, and I bet Ben got the blame even on the days when he wasn't there!
You are right, children are very quick to blame the naughty one.

weepootle Mon 22-Nov-10 19:34:32

hmm I think the reason the naughty ones get the blame is because it is them doing it. It's a very small nursery and he's the only one who does any pushing.

cookielove Mon 22-Nov-10 20:49:19

How do u know that he is the only one pushing even the "good" ones push to. I actually just picked a random name just so you know I'm not saying any ben is naughty.

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