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Teenage son barely talks to me, help!

(11 Posts)
user1495395038 Sun 21-May-17 20:48:06

My son H, seldom talks to me. To be perfectly honest has very little to do with me. he manages to communicate well with his Dad and older sister. Quite simp,y it's tough, and difficult at times when you need to remind yourself it's just hormones and that hopefully he will grow out of it. I find it easier to go and do something else myself. Our family is fragment as I'm also battling anxiety/ depression. Difficult is an understatement!

Wolfiefan Sun 21-May-17 20:52:11

How old?
It's normal for kids to start to distance themselves from their parents as they reach teenagerhood! It's a way of preparing them and us for when they leave the nest.
Is he just getting more private or do you have wider concerns?

Optimizeni Mon 22-May-17 23:39:00

Heya just read your thread ... my advice is go for a walk with him or drive where you are side by side kids talk better when they aren't opposite prepare to walk in silence he will fill the gaps do it often and the relationship will grow ..simple things work best x

ImperialBlether Mon 22-May-17 23:43:35

It's really tough, but it's not to say that's what he'll be like always. I agree with the previous poster, try to talk when he's not the main focus of attention. I watched TV programmes my kids liked (whether I liked them or not) so we had that to talk about. Keep it neutral. Never ask about friends or offer opinions. It's really, really tough.


user1495395038 Tue 23-May-17 17:18:36

H is 14. I guess just very private. Thank you for your understanding. It means a lot, x

user1495395038 Tue 23-May-17 17:19:56

Thank you for your advice. I will certainly give it a whirl. X

user1495395038 Tue 23-May-17 17:20:47

Thank you for the words, and it's refreshing to know that I'm not alone. X

AmandaRif Wed 24-May-17 16:33:24

Play pool with him. Close environment, you can talk about the game, its not too distracting to avoid conversation and then you should raise conversation about planning something. Ask for his advice on planning a party. empower the youngster and let him know you trust him with responsibilities and your willing to listen.

crunched Wed 24-May-17 16:41:17

I think this is very normal. I made an effort to show an interest in the PlayStation, Sci-fi movies and rugby when my DS was around the 12/13 mark. Weirdly enough, I now genuinely enjoy the last two grin.
Now, a few years down the line, I believe we are pretty close.

I think my DH would say the same as you regarding our DD. Like a PP said, it is part of the growing up process.

user1497471563 Sat 17-Jun-17 17:41:08

Hi, I know I am late to this but I work with teenagers and having just read this had a thought- if he knows you are suffering with depression and anxiety, which I am assuming he does, then perhaps he is being careful around you as he doesn't want to upset you or cause you anymore sadness. Please don't blame yourself if this is the case; it just shows what a good job you are doing of raising a sensitive young man. You say he speaks to your husband so possibly he could raise this and see is this is an issue or if he is just being a typical teenager.

SafeToCross Sat 17-Jun-17 18:29:02

Have you read the book 'how to talk so teens will listen and listen so teens will talk'? I think it has a bit in it about how some teenage boys literally find it painful to be in the same room as their Mum's, but do love them!

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