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Single mum of 3 trying to restart her life

(4 Posts)
VelmaD1 Sun 19-Mar-17 09:53:16

Hello. New here. I'm a single parent of three and feel frustrated by not being part of the rest of the world nor being understood. People don't want to know. I have no family support. My children are a bit older now so I can go out to yoga and the eldest look after the youngest 10 year old. Finances and time and energy levels doesn't allow much more than that. Most of the time I am spending my energy making home a good place to be and devoting my time with my children because they need me. I know this won't last forever. I also find creative things to do at home but need confidence to put myself out there. I am sure there are many more women like me so I joined here to find you and chat. Only 2 of mine visit their dad so I don't get a break. I am still supporting their emotional needs from his behaviours. My children are wonderful - it's just everyone needs to find joy and happiness and we deserve that too. The hardest part of all this is that i have had a relationship since the divorce but it isn't easy...back to doing someone else's washing just had added to my workload and taken time away from things I felt I needed to do for me. And I was still being both parents. I am trying to start a business whilst home educating my youngest and am finding some days it feels like i make next to no progress on anything. That's when I am filled with self doubt and loneliness creeps in too. I'm not depressed it's just hard to remain on top form and ultra motivated the whole time. Sometimes I just want someone to offer to cook me dinner and do everything so I can have a rest and I would bounce back. There isn't anyone though. Lovely to be here.

motheralmighty1 Tue 28-Mar-17 18:26:26

Hi Velma I'm in a similar situation myself nice to meet you x

MonicaOHT Tue 28-Mar-17 21:56:26

Hi Velma,
I have just joined, i am a single parent of 2 boys. I identify with lots you have said, and i feel the loneliness too. Sometimes i just want someone to cuddle me and do something for me for a change.

VelmaD1 Wed 29-Mar-17 09:52:37

Hi MonicaOHT and motheralmighty1 thanks for responding. I think single mums must have a disease. No-one wants to know or befriend you in case they catch it...whatever it was that got you here. I get child maintenance from ex and it would appear from the outside that this is a great situation to be in. He was emotionally and financially abusive so I still feel he is in control. I desperately want to free myself from this. I am trying to start a business from home as my youngest (i have just assessed him myself) has dyslexia and probably adhd so I am home schooling because the school just saw this as behaviour (despite my teaching background and requests for aessessments that could only see home school and divorce as his barriers) my eldest two have not had the same issues and had the same start. I'm sure there's a way to get this balance and a good outcome for all. Let me know how you do it?

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