Single mother wanting 2nd child

(7 Posts)
user1490204459 Sat 13-Jan-18 00:55:31

Hello ladies,

I am in a hard situation where I have no family, very few friends which are precious to me, so at times I feel lonely, more so for my son.
I have a 3 year old boy who is absolutely gorgeous! So well mannered and compliments me every day! ❤️ I am so proud to be his mother, he wants me to have another baby and he says the baby will be for him, not me. 😂 I find that super cute, so he is really making me feel so broody, but I am very nervous about having a second child as a family member is always telling me how hard it is having 2 children and that she should of had just the one, so she’s made it clear she wouldn’t be happy if I fell pregnant again. But I see this as souly MY opinion and I think my son would be over he moon with a sibling, and I would love to experience having a newborn and watching how they learn all over again as with my son I missed out on a lot. Although he has always been with me, we have been through some hard times. So now my life is easier, I feel I am ready.
I am wanting to have another child with my ex fiancé, he can be an ass but he is supportive (sometimes) although he’s not living with us, he loves his son. I also do not want to feel guilty having 2 children with two different men, I want my children to be full siblings. I have had one beautiful, loving child by him already, so I don’t see the harm in it. 🤷‍♀️
I just hope that my final decision is a good one.🤔

OP’s posts: |
WhyFy Sat 13-Jan-18 01:12:22

There's every chance the new baby and your existing child will not get on. Constant fighting, arguing, telling. Do not have another child just to appease your son.

It needs to be because YOU want another child and you can ensure you're able to give both children all the financial and emotional support they'll need.

Is your ex partner involved quite a bit with your son? Does he contribute financially? How does he feel about being a dad all over again?

Personally I would not have another child with a man I deem an "ass". I wouldn't subject myself or another child to having more involvement with such a person.

I had one child with a total ass 10 years ago. I've stayed single since! No chance would I have subjected another child to his nastiness.

Rainbowsandflowers78 Sat 13-Jan-18 01:14:32

How is that going to work if he’s your ex?! You have to sleep together, a lot, to have a baby you know.
Are you getting back with this man then?

DonnyAndVladSittingInATree Sat 13-Jan-18 01:16:18

I also do not want to feel guilty having 2 children with two different men

Why would that be a source of guilt? hmm

WitchesHatRim Sat 13-Jan-18 01:26:36

If I was your ex I would think it's a ridiculous idea. Sorry.

SuperBeagle Sat 13-Jan-18 01:30:01

You'd be a fool.

And I pity your ex and your hypothetical child if you went through with such a selfish plan.

SD1978 Sat 13-Jan-18 01:30:13

Have you discussed this with him? Would he even agree? Would it be through a fertility clinic with a sample? Would you expect financial assistance? Interaction with the father? Would you accept he wanted nothing to do with child, even if it was a ‘full’ sibling? What if dad changed his mind and demanded access? Just because it’s amicable with one doesn’t guarantee the same with a second conceived in unusual circumstances.

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