Hi,
Despite the highs and lows, I am happily married and have two wonderful, amazing, exhausting, beautiful toddlers. I am blessed. Before being married, I dated a handful of men. Then, as it is now, I periodically think about my first boyfriend - the thoughts are intense, sometimes I want to cry. To make a long story short, we dated from 16-22. I broke up with him a couple of times during that time (he was nice, smart, but sort of rough around the edges, so it caused me some anger). At 22, I broke it off entirely, but did it in an awful way: on the phone (I moved to another city for school...we still live in different cities about 5 hours apart). This was in 2005!!! I never saw him again...we exchanged a few emails until 2009, and after that, we lost all contact. I sincerely feel like he loved me unconditionally. He would have NEVER broken up with me, and sometimes I feel like I made a horrible mistake. We were young, loved each other a lot, through the calm and the tumultuous times too. Our families knew each other. We were each others' first love...first everything. Why do I keep thinking about him??? Do I need closure? I want to email him, but feel that I am somehow betraying my husband...I would never do anything to hurt my family, but want to know so badly how he's doing, how he's been, if he's happy....I need a sign. Please help!
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Married with kids, but thinking about my first boyfriend from 12 years ago!!!
9 replies
Leeannah · 16/12/2017 01:51
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