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Please help with my 4 year old!

(5 Posts)
mumto3boys Tue 18-Nov-08 14:24:10

I have 4 year old twin boys. I made what I now know is a big mistake and potty trained them together. I think with hindsight that only twin 1 was ready. Twin 2 found it quite difficult and he also suffered very badly with constipation. He got the hang of wees quite well but we had major issues with poos.

About a year ago we discovered they have various allergies and since then, his constpation has gone. Over the months we have got him to poo on the toilet, he will go, he knows it doesn't hurt anymore etc.

BUT, the last coulple of months he has been wetting himself and the poo issue isn't completely sorted. He will still hold it in til he often has a little in his pants. Sometimes he will go of his own accord, some times I tell him he needs to go and he will. We have tried the 'sneaky poo' technique which worked for a while, as did charts etc. But he goes back to the same.

Same with wetting. He only does it at home and generally not when we have company. I am now at the point where I think it is that he can't be bothered to go. So what should I do? Yesterday he wet 3 times. He also had to be told when to go for a poo.

They were 4 at the weekend and we don't seem to be getting anywhere. He is a very stubborn child and smirks when he is wet, and lies about it. I think it's part laziness but also a control thing.

Help!! Everytime we think it's sorted, we end up back at square one.

wabbit Wed 19-Nov-08 04:00:28

keep bumping this someone will help...

for me - routine 'taking to the loo' really worked - before you eat... loo, wash hands
before you go out ... loo etc

so that's at least four trips to the loo

don't ask, say!

he'll soon get the hang that he can't get out of going

make it fun - make bubbles with soap in your hands - teach the twins how to do the same

kneedeepinthedirtylaundry Wed 19-Nov-08 05:37:07

Bumping for you. Good luck.

mumto3boys Wed 19-Nov-08 19:21:33

Thanks. I had a brainwave after I posted yesterday. They got a v smile console for their birthday at the weekend, so the rule is if you have clean and dry pants by dinner time, you get a go on the v smile after dinner.

Today - clean and dry !

Just hoping this may break the cycle and the vsmile is a good incentive for long enough!

fruitstorm Tue 27-Oct-09 15:52:49

my 4year old will not go to the toilet he holds it in when he his at school.and that is not good for him when.and when he comes home from school he is dancing around and crying.but the teachers say he will go.but i put a nappie on him becouse it not good for him to not go alday.and after school as well please help

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