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Sticking up for cloth nappy choice?(55 Posts)
Im pg with first child and have decided to use cloth nappies. My Dsis used cloth with her daughter and loved it. I'll admit, I prefer the way they look to disposables etc, and if my sister (who is incredibly lazy)can survive using cloth, then frankly so can I.
DP's younger sister works in a nursery, and ever since she heard that I will be using cloth, she will not shut up criticising my choice. The problems is that she doesn't even have a reasoned argument against them. She just keeps going 'they're minging' or 'you're mad' over and over and it is starting to drive me nuts. I'm not going to change my mind (I've already bought my nappies) but I'm worried that his sister's constant stream of negativity re cloth nappies will put DP off. She doesnt have kids, and is just prejudiced against them because, as a nursery worker, they're not worth the effort. Anyone got any tips to get her to shut up?? (sorry for the massive post)
um well why don't you tell her much you will
a) save in the cost of disposables
b) in washing leaky clothes from disposables
c) the planet?
and then tell her, politely, to keep her views to herself
btw, we used them for the whole of the first year and they were great. childminder hated them (she told me years later) but used them
My BIL was the same - childless but opinionated. What's that about???
How are cloth nappies more smelly than disposables? You flush the smelly parts and soak in an antibacterial detergent (or with tea tree oil)
believe me, infintely less smelly than disposables...
Bet your sil's nursery puts them in an industrial bin far away....
Just ignore her. The staff at both nurserys that DS has been to have loved cloth nappies as the poo leakage rate is far, far lower than with disps, saving them changing pooey clothes (which have to be kept and washed).
Both my CM & MIL have hated them & refused to use them after one day's trial - I suppose they do take a bit of getting used to. After 4 years & 3 dc in cloth, dh still manages to leave bits sticking out of the wrap so they wick wee all over the trousers. (He changes very few nappies...)
Once you've got the hang of them they are about a million times pleasanter to use, for all the reasons others have posted!
Can you say to your SIL: 'Look, if you wind your neck in now, I promise not to stand over you when you're pg, hectoring you about the damage despicables do to the environment?' Or would she not take kindly to that...
raven - very tempting suggestion. She is swearing never to have kids, and tbh seeing as she is 23 and never had a boyfriend...
I think nothing I say will make her accept my choice, she just has a blind prejudice against real nappies, but tbh I don't care about converting her to cloth or anything, just wish she would respect my choice as a parent, after all, I'm not asking HER to deal with them am I?
If that's the extent of her clever, reasoned, argument, how do you think she would respond to a loud fuckoff shut up?!! Sounds about the level of reason that would be worth trying to explain!
How annoying she is! Everyone said I was mad to use cloth with twins but I was like 'how hard can it be? A load of washing every two or three days...' and I was right. They are easy and much less smelly than disposables (and what's with all the poo up the back with disposables?)
What I find REALLY annoying though is when people say...
'I looked into using cloth nappies but actually when you take into account the water and detergent used to wash them they are just as bad for the environment as disposables'
What do you say to that? I say it's like saying it's better to buy new clothes than wash the ones you already have.
just tell her that the chemicals in disposables may cause tumours in later life and you don't want to be constantly worrying that you caused your bub to have cancer. That'll shut her up. And if you want to show her the evidence then you can be provided with the link to the relevent information.
(I'm not saying at all the dispos will cause tumours but there is an article which says about one of the chemicals used in the absorbent gel)
Besides, it's your baby and your choice so just tell her to pee off
Research has shown that disposables can cause baby boys genitals to heat up to the point where it could potentially damage fertility.
I used to have a link to a scientific paper about this but now can't find it - but let me know if you want chapter and verse and I'll try to google it!
disposables stink of wee and leak
real nappies don't
nuff said !!
turn it round on her.
if she says "they're minging" say
"oh, why do you think that?"
she will then say something along the lines of
"oh, who told you that?"
every time she answers, just question it. she'll soon realise that she has no answers for you, because she is talking out of her arse
I'm pretty sure that the report stating reusables were worse for the environment was based on washing them at 90 and tumble drying them. Most nappies can be washed at 60 (you might even get away with 40 if they're wet) and can dry outside most of the year.
And as for being 'minging', actually babies are minging. Once you've had sick in your hair, cleaned poo off the carpet and wee all over your trousers you really aren't going to give two hoots about lifting a net bag into a washing machine [grin}
reusables are cuter, much more comfortable for the baby and generally make you feel better about the world.
I might be tempted just to say "SIL, I'm a bit confused. Have I inadvertently said something at some point to make you think that I am interested in your opinion about cloth nappies? It's just that you keep on and on about them, and I'm not sure what you think you are achieving other than antagonising a hormonal pregnant woman..."
I wash mine at 30 and then do 60 wash every couple of weeks or so if they're getting a bit smelly.
or just chuck some bicarb in a pre-wash.
I find that between the sick on me, baby, dh there's not much difference in washing the nappies! I think they are excellent and ds seems to prefer them to disposables as they are softer (although we still use disposables at night and on long journeys for convenience...). I just wash mine on the regular wash with everything else - we do use disposable liners though...
I would suggest that unless your SIL is going to be changing the nappies for your child (and washing the washables!!) then it shouldn't matter a jot to her what you use!
mmm actually I think on reflection portandlemon's approach is probably easiest!
perhaps just repeat "do I look bovvered? Is this the face of someone who is bovvered? Am I bovvered?" at regular intervals until she shuts up!
I would also point out that lots of nurserys are fine with cloth nappies as ours said they would happily use the cloth ones, just putting them in a bag for us to wash at home and flushing the liners as it really didn't make any difference to them as they just change them!
Your SIL is in a minority - everyone coos over my DS's cloth nappies when they see them. Well done you on sticking to your guns. I'd ask her "what would you rather wear, paper pants or cotton ones?"
What MrsJamin has said is so true - my cloth nappies are sooo cute - and the wraps - you can be so creative with colours and styles. I even have some fab ones some made from Thomas the Tank Engine vintage material and some with vintage aeroplanes on for ds which are amazing! I have had my leakiest experiences with disposables (particular the bigger brand names too! I find are worse than supermarkets own brands...). We just keep a nappy bucket in the downstairs loo, change the nappy, flush the liner, nappy in bucket. The nappies then get washed with the next wash (unless they have got particularly soiled then I wash them seperately). I still think you should go for it, as I figure that every washable used saves another disposable from going to landfill as I do feel a bit guilty about it...
I'm also a strong fan of washable sanitary towels - as I figured if you can wash baby poo you can cope with menstrual blood! - Happy to recommed a wide range of this sort of products you could REALLY gross your SIL out with, but which are actually immensly practical and comfortable!
Also makes financial sense - my friend who also has 2 children spends a fortune on disposables, whereas I use DD'old nappies on DS...
There are calculations somewhere as to how much you save. Isn't it about £650.00? I don't know
Plenty of people think like this. I remind them Idon't want my kids' shit poisoning the land and chemicals shrivelling thier genitals. That shuts them up.
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