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Night training - does it just happen by itself?

(39 Posts)
elliott Tue 11-Jan-05 16:37:50

It seems very quiet today so I'm not sure what response this v boring topic is going to get, but never mind!

I am feeling a bit clueless about the whole night training business. Does everyone just wait until miraculously the nappies are dry in the morning, or what?

Ds1 is only just 3 so obviously quite young to be thinking about dry at night, but I like to be prepared! He is in pullups at night and since he went into a bed a few months ago, he's had a potty in his bedroom in case he wants to go in the night (the toilet is not accessible). he has used this at bedtime before he's gone to sleep, so I know he can do it, but he's never used it without prompting first thing in the morning.
his nappy is always wet in the morning, although not very heavy, and often its clearly pretty fresh! - I suspect he's going at some point in the early morning but not sure if he is fully awake or aware that its happening. On odd occasions there has been very little in the nappy and he has managed a much bigger wee in the potty.
Is there anything I can do to encourage him to go to the loo as soon as he wakes, or is this just something that will come in time? Is there any point in trying without nappies before he has had some completely dry ones in the morning?

bakedpotato Tue 11-Jan-05 16:43:46

glad you asked this. we're in exactly the same boat.

Eulalia Tue 11-Jan-05 16:49:43

Hi elliot. I think you are supposed to wait till you get some dry nappies before trying without... unless you want a flooded bed! The dryness shows bladder control. Unless you suspect he is weeing because he has a nappy on and knows it is OK to wet it. Wondering when dd (2.9) will be fully trained myself as dd is dry about half of the time. I am hoping it will just happen by itself.

nutcracker Tue 11-Jan-05 16:50:11

It did for us yeah. Dd1 was out of nappies in the day at about 2.9 and i thought it would be ages until she ws dry of a night but after about another week of putting her nappies on of a night i realised that they were all dry in the morning and so stopped putting them on.
Luckily dd2 was the same.

Have got to start potty training ds this summer, somehow don't think it will be a similar story.

oatcake Tue 11-Jan-05 16:53:29

I actually took my MIL's advice after she was 'mentioning' it since ds was 2, but since he was 2½, my husband has been lifting him out of bed onto his potty at around midnight. This sees him through. Only had about 6 accidents in 7 months.

starlover Tue 11-Jan-05 17:42:24

If you think he is going in the morning and might be awake then try him without a pull-up... but be prepared for the wet bed!
If he is awake when he does it then he'll soon find he doesn't like being in a wet bed whereas it's very easy to do your morning wee in your nappy without really feeling uncomfortable!... might just prompt him into getting out and doing it.

wendy14 Tue 11-Jan-05 17:59:54

My daughter was potty trained at around 2 1/2. I wasn't at all bothered about pushing her to be dry at night and just let it happen. It took a good year ( I think) for the dry nappies to become more common. Then you just have to make the leap of faith and lose the nappy! I put plastic sheet and then a bed mat on the top. Only had a couple of accidents. I don't think it's worth getting stressed about - I don't think there is the same rush about getting them dry at night as it causes a lot less hassle than daytime dryness - IMO.

I found that the pull-up nappies were getting too small and were leaking at night - had to use the age 4-7 pyjama pants instead.

KBear Tue 11-Jan-05 18:11:22

My DS is 3.4 and has been dry the day for about 6 months and dry at night for about two months THAT IS UNTIL THIS WEEK....he's started wetting the bed every night. He doesn't drink more than a sip after 6, has a wee before bed and STILL wets. What's going wrong?

sorry to digress a bit but in answer to your question, I agree, wait for a few dry nappies and then take the plunge. My DS sleeps on a big fluffy towel too which absorbs alot and stops the spread of wee right across the bed.

blueteddy Tue 11-Jan-05 18:23:35

My ds is 5 & is still in pull ups at night.
He has been dry during the day since before he was 3, but we can't seem to tackle nighttime!
I have tried taking the pull ups away from him, but we have constant wet beds & I am at the end of my tether!
I have also tried lifting & cutting down bedtime drinks, but nothing has worked so far!
My hv told me to not give him fizzy drinks or blackcurrant after lunchtime (not sure why?) but if anyone knows any great ways to stop bedwetting I will be very interested!

Kelly1978 Tue 11-Jan-05 18:31:16

Maybe I was jsut lucky but with dd I jsut stopped putting her nappy on at night a few weeks after she was dry during the day and that was that. She was 2.
Ds is 2.5 now and was daytime trained about 6 weeks ago, and about 3 weeks ago I forgot to put a nappy on him and he has been dry at night since. He was previously dry or maybe one wee in his nappy at night. Once the nappy was gone he held it, and just dashes to the loo when he wakes up in the morning now.
You could get some waterproof sheets and just try, making no fuss about it has always worked for me.

elliott Wed 12-Jan-05 09:31:32

thanks for the replies guys. From the books I've read, it seems a substantial minority will become dry at night shortly after daytime training - that seems to have been the experience of a lot of you. Clearly my ds doesn't fall into this group, having been out of daytime nappies for over six months now, and I guess I was wondering what happens to these kids? Do they always become dry of their own accord, or has anyone had experience of 'encouraging' nighttime dryness - i.e. stopped the nappies while they are still wet, and had success?
I have to say I am not a very laid back type and am trying to resist doing it too early, as a lot of wet beds would really wind me up.
I'm also worried that ds has somewhat mixed messages as to what to do in the morning - on the one hand we have worked pretty hard and with some success to discourage him getting up too early in the morning, but on the other I am now telling him that its ok to get up to have a wee...I do think his wees are probably happening around 5 or 6 in the morning, when he is not completely asleep but not very awake either! I don't really want to start lifting because, again, I don't wnat to encourage night waking.
But I also don't want it to become too ingrained in him that its ok to wee in his pullups - it is the easy option after all!

Hulababy Wed 12-Jan-05 09:42:35

We are in similar sitaution. DD is 2y 9m, and has been PTed during the day since she turned 2. She wears reusable Pulls Ups at night at they are dry about 50% of the time at the moment. Like others I think she is doing a week on stirring in the mornings, but isn't quite awake enough to get up and go to the toilet.

DD has rwecently given up her night time dummy, as she is now a big girl, and refuses to wear her bed pants on going to bed for the same reason. However, at the moment I am putting her pants on her when I go to bed. I did consider oputting her on the potty at this time too, but she isn't always properly awake when I do it. Sure I have read on MN that lifting doesn't necessarily aid night time training, as they are niot learning to do it by themselves???
I am just monitoring her at the moment, and not going to push it just yet. I have a feeling she will just be ready completly in her own time. Once we move and get resettled, I am going to start leaving the potty, stood on a folded towel, in her room I think too.

NotQuiteCockney Wed 12-Jan-05 09:44:04

We found DS1 was waking in the morning because he had a full bladder. Also, because he'd fiddle with his willy while going to sleep, his willy was often not in the pull-up anyway, so if he wet, he wet the bed. So we started lifting - we wouldn't wake him, just put him on the pot, and go "sssss" in his ear. It worked pretty well, so we could stop being woken at 5 by him needing to wee.

We stopped lifting him before he was three, as we were suspecting it was no longer necessary, and we were right - he sleeps through now almost always, and has accidents once a month or couple of months.

Because of all this, he was dry at night from about 2.5. I think he was dry so young partly because he has a massive bladder, which isn't exactly something you can train!

So I'd try lifting if you really need to (without waking) but there's no point in rushing things.

Hulababy Wed 12-Jan-05 09:47:12

Hmmm....maybe I could try it too. DD can go ages and ages during the day without going for a wee. Day time training only took a couple of days, but I haven't even broached this one yet!

bakedpotato Wed 12-Jan-05 09:47:15

elliott, same, same. dd has been (effortlessly) dry by day since last spring. but shows NO sign of being dry at night. we've never had a dry nappy in the morning, despite the fact that recently we have been lifting (btw if your ds is a good sleeper, i'd be surprised if this really disrupted his sleep, DD barely rouses and is asleep by the time we've finished tucking her back. but this probably means she's not really conscious of weeing which sort of defeats the object anyway).

i've been thinking about this a lot and since reading this thread (and ferber a bit last night) think the only way to make her connect day and night weeing is to cold-turkey it without a nappy. ie, she'll have to feel the sensation of a wet bed and learn to anticipate it.

ferber's attitude seemed to be (i think -- i did skim read with half an eye on the telly) that this is fine, and works, as long as you are totally calm and reassuring about the inevitable wettings at the beginning.

however with new baby due in a couple of weeks, i think we're going to have to leave it until the summer. I am scared though as i imagine the later we leave it, the more horrid she will find the experience. she's already very fastidious.

also, DD has never got out of bed of her own accord, so it will really be asking a lot of her...

will be very interested to hear what you decide to do.

elliott Wed 12-Jan-05 11:51:48

hi again. seems like a few of us in the same boat then! But what about those of you who are through all this - can't you give us some pearls of wisdom??
Hula, if I was getting that level of dry nappies I'd be tempted to give it a go. We haven't had ANY completely dry ones yet, but I started getting excited a few weeks ago because we had some almost dry ones, together with a much bigger wee, and ds1 started talking about wanting to do a 'big wee' when he got up. Sicne then we seem to have gone back to him not being very bothered about going first thing, having just weed in the nappy, so not sure if he's got lazy or isn't really ready yet. Not sure about just trying it out, I suspect he won't be that bothered about wetting the bed, but I know I will be and I'll end up getting cross with him which sort of defeats the object.
bakedpotato, wow to your dd never having tried to get out of bed! suspect that might mean she will call for you to help her....ds1 has been very sweet about using the potty by himself without disturbing us - I once came upstairs to bed to find a full potty carefully placed on the landing for us to empty!

dinosaur Wed 12-Jan-05 12:15:08

I forgot to put DS2's nappy on one night and hey presto! he was dry next morning. We'd only had the occasional dry nappy before that. DS2 was aged three years and four months at the time and had been consistently dry during the day for about six months.

However my DS1 who is now nearly five and a half is hardly ever dry at night...

Eulalia Wed 12-Jan-05 13:04:22

elliot - sounds like he is getting there. If it were me I'd be tempted to see if he could hold on all night rather than waking him. My dd was dry last night and slept for 11 hours so it can be done, boys are a bit slower though.

dinosaur - oh I know I don't ds will EVER be dry, he is always soaking but is terrible for drinking in the evening. I forgot to put a nappy on him one night and the bed was soaked and he was covered in it, yuk, had to put him in the shower before school.

SoupDragon Wed 12-Jan-05 17:36:23

I've never understood the point of night training unless your child is older than is "usual". Both DSs trained themselves by 3y8m or so. I just left them in pullups until they started getting up to go to the toilet themselves. Lifting seemed too much hassle and odd (if they don't learn to do it themselves, what's the point?) and I couldnt face the thought of dealing with wet beds in the night <shudder>>

I fully accept that I've been lucky with DSs but I do believe there's no point trying until they show signs of being ready - they need to be physically ready to do it.

bakedpotato Wed 12-Jan-05 17:52:19

Soupdragon -- at what age did your DSs quit daytime nappies? judging from this thread it does seem as if most children are dry at night shortly after pottytraining by day, as if they just make the connection. this hasn't happened in my dd's case, or in that of Elliott's ds.

no one has posted to say yes, my DD suddenly turned dry at night a year after giving up daytime nappies... but if you can, i will gladly wait and see.

pupuce Wed 12-Jan-05 17:55:15

Nutcracker mine were like that too.. dry day and night simultaneoulsy. Obviously day we taught (fairly easily) but night were just dry nappies in the morning.
DS was 2yo and 4 months
DD was dry for her 2nd birthday.
Some of us are quite lucky I think!

SoupDragon Wed 12-Jan-05 17:57:06

Tey were both day trained at around 2y 8m and night trained within a year after that (at 3y 8m).

So, just what your last question was now I read your whole post

SoupDragon Wed 12-Jan-05 17:58:16

FWIW, a friend's DS is still not dry at night 2yrs after being dry in the day. Despite lifting etc.

sozie Wed 12-Jan-05 19:19:48

Dd was potty trained quite late at 2 y 7 mo and it was all done and dusted in a week I'd say. However, 1 yr later she still wanted night nappies and they were wet in the mornings. One night however I put her to bed forgetting to put nappies on and in the morning she was dry. This was a huge surprise to her and she agreed not to have them again. She did have a couple of accidents in the first 3 months but has been fine ever since. I wonder if I should have done it earlier now [shrug]

Azure Wed 12-Jan-05 20:21:38

DS (3.5) has been dry at day for over six months, but I've kept a nappy on him at night. I regret not keeping him in pants at night straight away because his nappies weren't very wet initially, but now they're quite full in the morning. He very much knows he can wee in his nappy and so does it. I think it'll take forever for him to be dry of his own accord. Should I take the plunge and not put a nappy on him?

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