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my 5 year old boy doesn't want to wee standing up.

(22 Posts)
msspock Sat 06-Nov-04 15:01:38

Any ideas on how to get him to make the move to standing up? Even though he's started school he still is quite content to go to the toilet, not the urinals. My husband says he himself only learned to use the urinal just before he started school. But after being used to the toilet for 3 years now how do we convince our son to make the change now? How did we end up this way? eep. I guess I thought he'd just pick it up watching his dad and other boys, but he's not had a go for ages now and seemed put off by the risk of spills.

Debbiethemum Sat 06-Nov-04 15:06:32

My ds will wee standing up as had to learn as won't sit on an adult toilet. BUT he will not hold his penis himself, I have to hold it. So what I am trying to ask is will he pee standing up if you hold his penis for him, then try to get him to hold it himself and use the old ping pong ball down the loo to aim at.

Doddle Sat 06-Nov-04 15:06:44

Try floating a ping pong ball in the loo, it won't disappear when you flush and it's great fun to aim for!! Has worked for ds1, also 5, who is very content to sit!

msspock Sat 06-Nov-04 15:15:51

will try the ping pong thing. He doesn't want to stand and try weeing that way at all, regardless of who's holding the penis! It hadn't occurred to me to offer to hold his penis when he's standing. I thought at 5 that would be a bit old. Will definitely get some pingpong balls and try to go straight for him holding it himself and aiming. Merci.

MarsLady Sat 06-Nov-04 15:26:19

did the ping pong ball thing with ds1 and will do it with ds2. very effective and highly recommended

jacksmumto1 Sat 06-Nov-04 15:30:15

msspock... hope you don't mind but can I ask a question on your thread?? It is sort of related!

How do you teach a boy to pee standing up? I'll explain.. we are potty training and yesterday got caught out away from a loo... I ended up holding him in a sitting position.. Would appreciate any suggestions!

thanks, becca

MarsLady Sat 06-Nov-04 15:33:26

roll his trousers and pants right down. get him to aim at a certain spot on the tree/wall whatever and then shake his penis. That worked for me and ds1 hope that helps.

Easy Sat 06-Nov-04 16:17:29

Um... does it matter?

Ds didn't learn to wee standing up for ages. If we were caught without a loo I held him in a sitting position to wee. He learnt after staying with my BIL one weekend, and I wasn't all that pleased.

In the house I think it's cleaner (no spills) and you don't get the seat left up. DH always sits anyway.

I wouldn't force the issue, and make toiletting a problem if it isn't. When he sees his friends at school doing it, he probably will anyway. if not, so what?

msspock Sat 06-Nov-04 16:45:18

Dear Easy,
you are right that in a way it's not a problem at all if my son doesn't wee standing up. i'm glad you said it. As Robert Preston says to Julie Andrews in "Victor Victoria" "there's no rule that says a man can't pee stitting down.." But some day when my little man has to use gents' loos and not the ladies, on his own, I think he'd find it more pleasant to avoid the cubicles if he doesn't need em! Thanks!

aloha Sat 06-Nov-04 17:42:52

I know lots of men who won't use public urinals and always use a cubicle, because they dislike urinating in public as much as I would! And adulthood is a long way away at five. I really, really don't think it is a problem of any sort.

myermay Sat 06-Nov-04 19:56:49

Message withdrawn

frogs Sat 06-Nov-04 20:14:47

My ds (also 5) will wee standing up if he's caught short outdoors, or if he's with a friend who does 'standing-up weewees', but otherwise he sits down.

Don't know how he pees at school, I've never asked him. Surely sitting down is a Good Thing, as it reduces the misfire factor?

LIZS Sat 06-Nov-04 20:16:07

myermay, my dh too ! I'm with Easy -is it such a big deal ? In some areas of Europe it is more polite for men to sit anyway and certainly during the night (less echo !). Peer pressure usually seems to prevail [visions of post soccer, 3 6 yr olds grouped around one urinal].

In an emergency we taught ds to bend his knees a little and push his hips forward to pee. Also rememeber to take any incline and wind direction into consideration or he'll get splashed !! Alternatively could he just squat and push it down.

marthamoo Sat 06-Nov-04 20:27:20

It doesn't really matter does it? He will probably register that the other boys at school pee standing up and follow their lead after a while. Can't remember when ds1 started peeing standing up but I think it was after he started school.

marthamoo Sat 06-Nov-04 20:32:59

Just out of interest, msspock - you say that you wnat him to learn to pee standing up so that when he uses gent's toilets on his own some day he can use a urinal (and I would go along with that!). When do you think that will be? My ds1 is almost 8 and I still take him in the ladies with me. He is just starting to say "aww, Mum - it's the ladies!" but I take no notice. I was wondering when you (and anyone else) would let their boy use men's toilets alone. 'Cos, quite frankly, I'm thinking about...oooh...17!

coppertop Sat 06-Nov-04 20:49:39

Ds1 is 4yrs old and will stand up if it's an adult-sized toilet but sit down if it's a child-sized one. At his school there is one cubicle and one urinal for the boys in his Reception class. Ds1's teacher has told me that at the moment he is the only boy in the class who isn't frightened of the urinal (makes a horrible noise when cleaning itself) but he still doesn't use it. Dh will also avoid using urinals wherever possible. Some men/boys just don't like using them.

msspock Sun 07-Nov-04 13:07:22

marthamoo..I notice the changing rooms in my gym say 8 is the upper age limit for boys in the ladies/girls in the gents. 8 seems a reasonable age to let them go on their own. Is that what others have found?

Lonelymum Sun 07-Nov-04 13:14:39

My ds was sitting to wee after he started school, but then somewhere along the line, he changed to standing up. Perhaps it was peer pressure. I expect it was just easier to wee at the urinal in the school toilets than to go into a cubicle. I can't say I ever cared very much about it. It all seemed to work out in the end without worrying about it. I expect your son will be the same eventually.

Lonelymum Sun 07-Nov-04 13:18:54

Ds1 is 8 and ds2 is 6 and they go into men's toilets by themselves, although if it was just ds2, I would probably take him into the ladies (but he wouldn't like it!) I think they have to be independent at school, so they must be able to manage OK outside school. I know people worry about perverts in public loos, which isn't a concern (I hope!) in school toilets, hence not liking the 6 yo to go in alone, but I think by the time they are 8, they should be able to go in by themselves. I think 9 or 10 is verging on too old to go into the ladies with mum, but it all depends on the child (and the loos!)

jane313 Sun 07-Nov-04 13:35:53

I saw this once in a magazine. No idea if it works. But you wouldn't want to carry it around
weeman

MINIMAX Thu 11-Nov-04 17:24:45

That's a bizarre contraption!!!

My husband always used to go on at my son to try and stand up, but I told him to leave him as he would do it when he was ready. For some reason when he turned 4 he decided he was old enough and just did it. Sometimes he'll still sit down, but most of the time he just stands up now. Let him do it in his own time is my motto for most things with him.

JO

page24 Sat 09-Apr-16 03:27:15

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

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