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Sweets as reward for using potty - rod for my own back?

(5 Posts)
pobletsmum Wed 29-Aug-07 17:14:51

Hello,

I daresay this has been discussed before, but still hope someone might be able to help please.

We did the whole potty training thing 3 months ago with DS (then 2;0) at HIS request. He did really well at home & nursery with wees for a week (barely any accidents). Then he had a cold and it all went pear-shaped. We persevered for another week but he's been back in nappies ever since. At that time, he really didn't get the whole 'poo in potty' thing.

Yesterday, DS (now 2;3) asked again for big boy pants, so I obliged. He did really well with wees, but a poo in his pants. He was dry all night last night (I'm so proud!). This morning I could tell he needed a poo, but he seemed really reluctant/scared to sit on his potty. He didn't have pants on and looked like he didn't know what to do with himself. He wanted cuddles. I promised him sweets if he did a poo in the potty and it worked! It seemed to be just the incentive he needed to overcome the fear. He was so proud of himself. My question is though, if I have to do this for every poo, how will I ever get him to do it without the promise of sweets? Am I making a rod for my own back?

Another question is about pullups. 1st time round I avoided pullups on the advice of nursery, who said 'all or nothing', and it did work. Today we went out to a play centre for most of the day so I put DS in pullups, as it's early days with potty training this time round. He is still wearing the same pair I put on this morning - no accidents all day! I'm tempted to leave him in pullups all the time till we have the potty thing sussed. He checks to see if the little pictures have disappeared, which seems to be a good incentive to keep them dry. It would be much easier if i don't have pooey pants to clean! What are your opinions? Will it confuse him/slow things down?

Thank you!

beautifulgirls Wed 29-Aug-07 20:31:07

Based on everything I have read here and my experience of half heartedly PT DD#1 then going for it properly with no more pull ups - DITCH THE PULL UPS! Go out armed with changes of clothes - take a towel for him to sit on on public seats like cafes etc just in case, and no looking back. The worst that happens is that you have to change his clothes smile
I used M&Ms as bribery for every poo and wee when we went for it - then gradually she just started to go on her own more frequently and stopped asking for the sweeties. I personally would use them to get your ultimate goal sorted, then as things get more settled if it does not fizzle out with the need for sweets try a different reward idea like a sticker chart with a prize at the end of the week - something less tooth rotting and more useful - a new book or crayons or something. You can then use sticker charts for all sorts of other behaviour in the long term and work away from the whole potty thing.

pobletsmum Wed 29-Aug-07 20:51:19

Thank you beautifulgirls. I guess maybe I do have to bite the bullet and ditch the pullups. It was just so much less stressful today being out and about (softplay & farm) with them for security. DS was dry almost all day (1 tiny accident at grandma's house this evening) so maybe I'll go for it tomorrow. I have a Weetec piddle pad thing for DS' car seat, a portable potty and hundreds of pairs of pants from last time, so I have everthing I need. I just have to get on with it.

I'm relieved to hear that you used M&Ms but aren't still needing to use them. I tried a sticker chart last time, which DS and I made together, but DS wasn't very motivated by it, hence the sweets this time. I never normally give him any sweets, so it seems a big deal, but hopefully it's just short term.

I'd still be interested to hear anyone else's experiences. Thank you.

Chuffed Fri 31-Aug-07 10:30:30

We used sweets.
dd got like a jellybean for wees and a choice of 3 for a poo.
Once she had got the hang of it she stopped reminding me for it (I sort of forgot quite often you see grin.
Then I decided if she had no accidents all day she could choose her treat at the end of the day. Then it was over 24hrs (she went night dry very quickly).
Then it just passed and it got so much of a habit going toilet that it didn't come up.
Sticker chart just didn't work for her straight sweet motivation all the way!

Not sure what I'll do for ds though as everytime he will get a treat I can see her wanting one too.

Oh and I went cold turkey, we put away all the nappies together, packed them up all ready for her brother. We had a pair of training pants for those 'really can't have accidents moments' which could stop a wee going onto the floor but everything she was wearing would be wet. They were great and they looked, felt etc just like knickers so she couldn't tell the difference they just saved a few friends carpets etc.

pobletsmum Fri 31-Aug-07 12:31:20

Thanks chuffed! I think I'll stick with the sweets, but yesterday and today, we've had poos in pants again sad. Other than that DS is doing really well.

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