Advice for newly diagnosed ASD

[Prawnofthepatriarchy]

I'm over 60. I have a DB with bipolar whose psychiatrist suggested he had ASD. He and I are very alike, both fairly weird. Even our best friends say we're weird. Then I came across the term "impaired executive functioning" here on Mumsnet and I had a solution to a huge problem that's dogged me all my life.

I took photos of my house and showed my GP. He immediately referred me to psychiatric outpatients and after a load of tests over six weeks I have a diagnosis of ASD and dyspraxia.

I've been referred to the ASD team, which could take a year to come through. I'm currently seeing a psychologist. I'm going to get help with my house, claiming benefits and ACT therapy to help with my anxiety, depression and chronic pain.

But it turns out I know very little about ASD and what I thought I knew is wrong. For instance both my DB and myself are very good with the people we're close to and have no problem with eye contact.

Can anyone point me in the direction of books or other resources to help me make sense of my diagnosis?

[aprarl]

Welcome to the gang how are you feeling? I remember utter relief at first and then a profound sense of sadness for a while. It's weird how much it explains isn't it?

Generally Tony Attwood's guide to Aspergers is worth a read, even though he's one of the "autism is extreme male brain" idiots. So is Neurotribes for historical insight into how diagnoses have developed the way they have. Women are often referred on to resources like the Aspergirls book or the Curly Haired Project website, but I've not found them very useful.

I did find the reddit community Aspergirls useful back when I was diagnosed (though I expect they're not very GC these days). Some of their resources are here https://www.reddit.com/r/aspergirls/wiki/books

One of the saddest things you might find is that really there isn't a whole load of "help" out there. I mean, it depends on your NHS trust and what they can offer you (some do more than others) but really I found I just had to google a lot and read and try random things.

[Prawnofthepatriarchy]

Thank you so much for your reply, aprarl. You ask how I feel. Well, pretty excited at the moment. I've had it broken to me that there's bugger all that can be done for dyspraxia, although having a diagnosis explains a lot.

However the psychologist I'm seeing thinks quite a lot can be done about my ASD. I have fairly extreme impaired executive function. My house is chaos. For all my working life I had a cleaner, and my cleaners had to tidy as well as clean. They were wonderful. But in the last few years I've been disabled and unable to work, so the house has got progressively more overwhelming.

My psychologist says she can get me practical help with the house. She came to the house to check whether I am a hoarder (I'm not). She says she can get me help claiming benefits (I find dealing with officials overpowering) and also immediate therapy while I wait to be seen by the ASD team.

So it sounds as if I'm in one of the better areas. I've also been lucky that my psychologist is a Phd student and she's very positive about me. She says I'm so highly motivated and this means she can persuade people to help. I'm going to see the occupational health team as well as the ASD people. So I'm optimistic.

Thank you so much for the resources you provided. That's exactly the kind of help I was hoping for.

The only thing that's been negative is my DM saying it's an excuse for being messy and that she doesn't want me to change. But it's no biggy.