These are not as good as yours but you might not feel alone if I tell you them
We once went to a wedding in the middle of bloody nowhere and I had the map - a horrid fly landed on it so I tried to get it out of the window, but managed to let the map go too and as it was one I had printed out it was just a couple of sheets of paper we couldnt find it again.
Gave myself a black eye - DS has a toy that was like a ball on elastic that you attach to one leg with velcro and skip or kick it with the other foot. The velcro stuck to the carpet so I pulled it really hard - it snapped back and got me right in the eye.
Last night while washing my hair I got it caught in my bracelet, with my hand on top of my head, so I had to call DH to come and untangle me.
I hope you feel a little better - you made me laugh out loud anyway