Spicy foof

[Sparklfairy]

Not really AIBU but to be honest I don't think MN have a topic for this!

I batch cooked a curry yesterday. I'm a chilli head, and have a little jar of death that I add very sparingly to it to make it the heat that I want (no one else will be eating it!).

Clearly I've dripped some over the side of the jar and got it on my fingers. I didn't really notice, didn't rub my eyes or anything. Then I went for a wee and wiped...

I'm now sitting here, legs crossed, fanny on fire. Help! It'll probably pass shortly hopefully without any lasting damage and I'm not about to go slathering mayonnaise or milk or whatever on the area, but can any kind MNer's please distract me!?

should probably NC after this

[GordonBennett20]

😂😂😂 I would definitely get a cold flannel on it ASAP!!

[Windyatthebeach]

Botox lips!!

[AlexaCanBuggerOff]

This is the greatest thread title

I feel your pain! (Well not right now, but I have in the past 🤣)

[Marshmallow91]

You've made my day, OP

[weedoogie]

Yoghurt....

[HopeYouStepOnALego]

I think I'd put the water temp on cold and direct the shower head at my bits until I felt some relief

[Sparklfairy]

Well, there's me hoping for sympathy and you're all laughing at me!

No weedoogie. I refuse to start applying random home remedies to my vag!

[Sirzy]

I was really expecting the thread title to be the best typo ever!

[youareatwatadmitit]

That's one way to get a DIY trout pout

[shittingmysel]

Then at least go and sit in a cold bath for the sake of your foof.

[Mamalifeee]

Been there OP with chillies hahah I stood in the bath with the shower head blowing out freezing cold water then put a load of yoghurt on it then wrapped a towel around me for two hours haha! Then my partner came home while I was dropping the towel to go back in shower to rinse off he kind of thought I had to much fun while he was at work with all the the lovely white stuff around my downstairs

[iklboo]

Honestly yoghurt will help. It's a remedy for thrush. Just use plain Greek whole fat though. Don't try sticking a Müller Corner up there .

[slipperywhensparticus]

[Sparklfairy]

It must have got on my fingers when I put the jar away this morning I've showered since and washed my hands loads of times. WHY IS IT STILL STINGING

[InTheSummerhouse]

Yoghurt or milk will work better than water

[MulticolourMophead]

It's still stinging because the bit in chillies that causes the irritation is not soluble in water so isn't being washed away properly.

The reason yoghurt works is because it's dairy and has fats in it. The chill bit thatvirritates is soluble in fats, so the yoghurt helps.

[BrimfulofSasha]

have you got any yoghurt?

[JohnnyJohnnyYesMama]

Sorry op nothing helpful but

[Sparklfairy]

No yoghurt. I do need to go to the supermarket soon though. Going to wait until I'm not walking funny...

[BuzzShitbagBobbly]

You can neutralise strong smells by rubbing your hands on a stainless steel sink.

Maybe it works for sensation as well?

Although close the blinds first, you don't want to look like a dog with worms, scooting over your worktops.

[Gazelda]

Honestly yoghurt will help. It's a remedy for thrush. Just use plain Greek whole fat though. Don't try sticking a Müller Corner up there .

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[Soubriquet]

Describe your walk?

Is John Wayne style or like a cross legged bunny hop?

[LeaderBee]

I've chopped chilli's and been to the loo before. My pee pee was burning.
In all honesty, dairy will work but any oil should do as well so give that a try - only problem is you'll have a greasy foof instead and I don't know if that sounds any better.

[Zaphodsotherhead]

I thought that if a curry was too spicy you put a potato in it? Maybe you could shove a bag of oven chips up and see what happens?

Actually, now I come to think of it I might be thinking about exhaust pipes. DO NOT put a bag of oven chips up your exhaust pipe...

[UtterlyUnimaginativeUsername]

Sit in a cold bath for a few hours.