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to share the things my BIL has moaned about whilst staying at our house for the past 3 days?

(630 Posts)

MNHQ have commented on this thread.

BanKittenHeels Sun 15-Sep-19 15:50:25

Amazon Prime Video doesn’t have the new Quentin Tarantino film that has just come out at the cinema. Ergo Amazon Prime is a waste of money.

The shower screen in the guest bathroom has a stationary rather than hinged shower screen.

That someone used the loo in the middle of the night and he could hear them flush - his bedroom door was 3/4 open.

We have stair gates, so our children don’t break their necks. “Really inconvenient”

The Thai restaurant sent us too many prawn crackers. They sent an appropriate amount for the number of people, actually.

My deodorant is blue. And what?

We don’t have an endless supply of spare clothes in his size and to his taste.

His hair was still in the shower in his en suite when he went back to use it the next day.

The towels I put out for him are white.

Our front gate is too squeaky.

The planes overhead are too low.

We have too many rugs.

He can hear traffic when in the garden.

Our dogs won’t cuddle him.

Our children wear shorts.

The settings of the seats in the car we lent him weren’t to his liking.

He doesn’t like the preset radio stations on our car radio.

My DH (his brother) “doesn’t wear a hat”??????

We don’t have his very specific music taste available to him on vinyl, although we did think to search out appropriate Spotify playlists for him but “that’s not quite the same authenticity”.

The local swimming pool (in a large city) keeps “provincial, British hours”.

Microwave steamers are “excessive gadgets”. Then 30 minutes later, “I suppose you could steam veg in your steamer, have you thought of that?” No shit!

None of the 3 duvets we offered him were suitable.

I use my inhaler too frequently.

Why do I have rosehip oil in the bathroom, it’s of no use to anyone.

confused hmmangry

GCAcademic Fri 20-Sep-19 22:47:48

This thread is more entertaining than anything on the telly at the moment.

Sorry OP, but I hope he stays longer.

BanKittenHeels Sat 21-Sep-19 00:49:12

He goes tomorrow and wouldn’t normally be back for a year but due to the nature of family crisis (seriously ill close relative) he may have to come back at any time. His nonsense is certainly making the air a little lighter and adding laughter during a very, very tough time.

To anyone lusting after a second dishwasher might I suggest the spot in bed where the OH resides? Less farty as gadgets go.

Tonight he moaned that my 12 month old doesn’t converse well. She is most frustrated as she gave him her best cackle, her bababababababahiiiiiii (high praise, I’m sure you can agree) and showed him her feet.

justilou1 Sat 21-Sep-19 01:30:50

He’s awesome!!! You’re going to miss him!

Owlsintowels Sat 21-Sep-19 01:51:32

Laughing far too much here OP!

My FIL is very similar. Lovely man, good heart in there somewhere, can be v kind to the kids but fuck me does that man know how to moan?

I don't have them all at my fingertips but I'll take note and post my own list next time he stays.

I can just about remember :
Not as many birds in my garden as his
My end of quiet cul de sac house is louder then his end of village cottage
Sausages have gone too far and have too much meat in them these days
DH getting a payrise means he's overpaid now
Too many boats at a coastal village shore
My poppies had too many ladybird larvae on them

And yes, some kind of book animal gets bad press in kids books! He was being fairly serious about this. Also pests get too good press, eg rabbits.

I always take the positive giddy schoolgirl approach of 'gosh, yes its amazing isn't it' where relevant, though when it relates to how much better his house /village are then my city I just nod and say 'yes, it's lovely being able to visit you somewhere so nice', I think positivity deflates and annoys him but he can't really complain back.

I particularly love the arguments he makes. Eg I ask for advice on painting a room.
- He moans about all the colours I've suggested.
- I force him to say what he'd do.
- I then agree that actually his is could work well, thanks
- he then tell me why actually it would be shit. He might make a mumble about one of my original colours maybe being ok
- I agree again
- he then lists five new reasons why it would be awful

We can go round and round like this for ages without him accepting my agreement on anything. I do it for a game sometimes.

He'd have no chat if he wasn't moaning, I let him go for it and enjoy laughing at the ridiculousness

Lofari Sat 21-Sep-19 02:33:33

Drinking game
Take a shot every time he moans.
I kid of course. Don't do this. You will die

FredaFrogspawn Sat 21-Sep-19 08:04:26

You will die
grin

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet (MNHQ) Sat 21-Sep-19 10:12:16

Hello @BanKittenHeels, we think it's only right and fair to mark the final day of your BIL's visit by immortalising this thread in Classics.

We would have done it sooner but:

Our chocolate biscuits had chocolate in them
The tea was in a blue cup
The sun was shining in through the window and it made us blink
A squirrel moved a nut in the garden

madambee Sat 21-Sep-19 10:24:52

Uhh thanks becky 😀

@BanKittenHeels, Re. Dishwasher/DH replacement.
Not only is you patience renouned, I think you will make an excellent couples therapist/interior designer as well 😂.

Hope you all have a lovely moany day.

Rhinosarefatunicorns19 Sat 21-Sep-19 10:30:57

He is the gift that keeps on giving

Surprised you haven't spat tea across the room laughing when he comes out with these little gems grin

Rhinosarefatunicorns19 Sat 21-Sep-19 10:32:41

Just had a genius thought, this man could be a YouTube channel all by himself!! like thought for the day only more inane and annoying. You could make a fortune!

64sNewName Sat 21-Sep-19 13:02:30

Hooray for the Classics decision!

I’m sorry times are so tough though OP. Sending positive thoughts your way flowers

ThumbWitchesAbroad Sat 21-Sep-19 13:51:43

Excellent move, Becky! grin

Sorry to hear about your very ill relative, BanKittenHeels but glad that your BIL woes are actually helping to lighten your days now you've brought them to MN and had them immortalised in Classics.

thanks and wine for you.

Sedlescombe Sat 21-Sep-19 13:53:40

He's gonna hate this thread. Do show it to him

JapaneseBirdPainting Sat 21-Sep-19 14:07:31

Oh this will probably out me, but DH has a friend like this who invites himself to stay about once a year when on a business trip so he can take the accommodaiton mnonye and pocket it.

It;'s constant moaning. I am not sure what the final straw was in the end. It might have been when he elaned over me while I was cooking dinner and said; 'Mummy doesn't cook roast chicken like that'. Or when he asked us to host a cocktail party at our own home for the people in his team and magnaminously commented that we were 'welcome to stay' for it ourselves.

Whatever it was, he went missing very soon after that and I'm admitting nothing.

SchadenfreudePersonified Sat 21-Sep-19 14:08:05

he has always been like this and as a child once complained about the atmosphere in a restaurant.

He's not Stewie off "Family Guy" is he?

JapaneseBirdPainting Sat 21-Sep-19 14:08:46

those words were *accommodation money

*leaned over me

SchadenfreudePersonified Sat 21-Sep-19 14:15:28

Not as many birds in my garden as his

That's that bitch at the back putting our high quality fatballs to lure your robin to her birdtables isn't it? Cow!

My end of quiet cul de sac house is louder then his end of village cottage

it's all of those noisy bloody birds in the garden over the back.

Sausages have gone too far and have too much meat in them these days

We've got to do something with our many relatives. This way it's win-win for us and the butcher.

DH getting a payrise means he's overpaid now

I can see why that's upsetting.

Too many boats at a coastal village shore

Bloody ocean - right near the beach!

My poppies had too many ladybird larvae on them

Greenfly would be a much better alternative.

ParoxetineQueen Sat 21-Sep-19 14:33:11

My FIL reminiscing about nutmeg on rice pudding, went out and bought cinnamon then complained that it didn’t taste the same

RandomMess Sat 21-Sep-19 14:33:57

Hurrrah for classics!

Cherrysoup Sat 21-Sep-19 14:34:35

@YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet 🤣

ChicCroissant Sat 21-Sep-19 14:42:31

I admire your view on life, OP, and your general fortitude in the face of extreme moaning star

Motoko Sat 21-Sep-19 14:48:17

Mummy doesn't cook roast chicken like that'.

Apart from his rudeness, "Mummy"? A grown man?

Motoko Sat 21-Sep-19 14:51:39

Meant to add, I was 10 when I had a very serious conversation with my parents, to inform them that now I was 10, I felt that using the terms "Mummy" and "Daddy", were too babyish, and from now on, I would call them "Mum" and "Dad"!

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll Sat 21-Sep-19 14:58:40

His wife is a fiery South American woman, I don’t think he would dare cross her.

Don't you worry about her, she can give as good as she gets and then some. She was the subject of another thread*, visiting the OP in her home near a farm in the countryside and was utterly outraged at the fact that there were farm/country noises and smells nearby.

*at least, I assume it must have been her.... grin

JapaneseBirdPainting Sat 21-Sep-19 15:02:43

Yep Motoko 'Mummy'.

That's one of the reasons it has stuck in my head! grin

FWIW, he says 'Mummy and Father'.

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