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Help write a GCSEs exam for teenagers -lightbloodyhearted

(398 Posts)
fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 09:54:12

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

madein1995 Sat 11-Jun-16 10:06:56

Question two

Identify the correct way to dry towels - on the floor, over the side of the bath, in the sink - and the scientific reasoning behind this. Further discuss who's responsibility it is to provide clean towels and why.

Question three

Jenny has just started working full time in a shop, she earns £200 a week as due to her age does not pay much tax. Jenny lives at home with her parents and eats their food, uses their toiletries etc. How much is appropriate for Jenny to pay in rent to her parents? Remember to consider how active Jenny's social life is likely to be. Choose an option from below

A) £50 a week
B) £25 a week
C) nothing but buys everything for herself apart from food
D) nothing and continues using household toiletries,expecting clothes to be bought for her

Explain your reasoning for choosing this answer

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:09:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LottieDoubtie Sat 11-Jun-16 10:15:00

Question Six,

Tom is 14 his parents are planning to take him to a family party on Sunday, the party is for his elderly great aunt who loves Tom very much and isn't expected to live much longer.
Tom wants to go to his friends party on Saturday night which of the following is reasonable, please explain your answer,

A) Tom goes to the party but is picked up at 10.45 and doesn't drink.

B) Tome goes to the party drinks alcohol and ignores his parents messages until eventually they go into the party to fetch him at 11.30pm

C) Tom is allowe to go to the party and stay overnight so he drinks alcohol and doesn't sleep until 5am, this makes him somewhat grumpy at the family event on Sunday.

elephantoverthehill Sat 11-Jun-16 10:15:16

Mohammed lives in a house with his 3 siblings. He and his siblings use on average 4 glasses a day. The children leave the glasses on top of the dishwasher (they think this is more helpful than leaving the glasses in the front room).
Calculate the following;
How many glasses does Dm put in the dishwasher per day?
How many in a week?
If the children were to use a glass more than once what would be gain in time, dishwasher powder, energy and water over a year? Explain your answers.

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:19:05

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Jane wears a clean shirt to school every day. Jane has six shirts. Explain using Bayes Theorem and taking into account microbiological cross contamination how likely it is that any given shirt on the floor on Thursday morning will be clean enough to wear to school.

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:20:02

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rockofages Sat 11-Jun-16 10:32:23

Ben gets dropped off near school by his mother on her way to work. He gets out of bed when he hears his mother's car starting on the driveway. Calculate how many extra minutes he gets in bed each week by failing to shower, clean his teeth, brush his hair and by throwing on the uniform crumpled on the floor next to his bed rather than opening the wardrobe to find a clean shirt and trousers. Estimate his mother's blood pressure readings en route and multiply those by the force caused by the slamming of the car door at drop-off. Explain why there is a need to reprimand his mother for not being delivered nearer to school and why, in 6 years, there is no need to say "thanks" for the lift.

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:35:01

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fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:36:43

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Ginmakesitallok Sat 11-Jun-16 10:37:54

It's soooo unfair!!!! - discuss

OooLookShoes Sat 11-Jun-16 10:41:14

gin wins

madein1995 Sat 11-Jun-16 10:41:41

Lucy has been talking to her grandmother who has informed her that when her mother was 16, she was dating some unsuitable boy, had her nose pierced, stayed out all night and buggered of to live with said boy for a fortnight. Lucy's mother is now 40, holds down a professional job, has Good qualifications and no indicator of her teenage rebellion. What should Lucy do with this information

1) bring it up as soon as she gets home, discusses it and listens to her mother's reasoning that it was not a good thing to do - Lucy realises what happened wasn't clever and in no way copies
2) says nothing - after all her mother has done ok and it was a long time ago
3) says nothing until a minor argument over washing up or similar and then comes out with 'well at least I haven't run away from home'
4) takes this to mean her mother can't have a go at her for her truancy, smoking etc and when mother disapproves calls her a hypocrite
5) uses this as an excuse to copy her mother's former behaviour

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:42:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Chippednailvarnishing Sat 11-Jun-16 10:44:23

If Jane sulks for approximately 6 minutes and argues for 3 minutes each time she is asked to do some housework, how many minutes a day extra would she have to straighten her hair if she only argued rather than sulking?

Hassled Sat 11-Jun-16 10:44:49

Psychology question: explain what is going on in Tom's mind when he puts an empty bottle of milk back in the fridge.

Glitteryfrog Sat 11-Jun-16 10:47:20

Explain how you will circumvent the broadband security your moderately techy parents have set up.
Use diagrams if necessary.

werealljustpassengerstonight Sat 11-Jun-16 10:49:24

If two girls share one bedroom how old will the oldest be when they scream "this is my side" and put tape across the floor.

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 10:52:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

rainbowstardrops Sat 11-Jun-16 10:58:15

These are hilarious grin

madein1995 Sat 11-Jun-16 10:58:34

What time is acceptable for mum to start hoovering upstairs, which may well wake up teenager? Consider whether it should be during the morning, afternoon or evening and give the answer using a 24 hour clock.

Jake spends appx. 2 hours a day arguing over homework, 2 hours a week pretending to clean his room and 5 hours a week slamming doors. Calculate how much extra time a month Jake would have to play on his computer if his parents were reasonable.

Chippednailvarnishing Sat 11-Jun-16 11:00:54

Explain using the periodic table why WKD will make you puke.

fuckincuntbuggerinarse Sat 11-Jun-16 11:01:23

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross Sat 11-Jun-16 11:05:13

Look: far too much Science and Maths going on here. Time for the English paper.

Read the following text carefully. How does the writer try to engage the reader in her thoughts and feelings in this extract?

OMG, it's like so unfair. Why do you hate me so much? No-one else's parents are so embarassing, it's just because you totally hate me and actually WANT everyone to laugh at me and pick on me because if you didn't you'd buy me those shoes, and anyway Jane's parents said she could go to Eve's party on Saturday and absolutely everyone will be there and how lame is it that I can't go just because I broke the TV which was like a total accident anyway and if my brother hadn't been so totally annoying I wouldn't have had to throw anything at him so it's actually like ALL HIS FAULT but you don't even care that after Saturday I'll have like NO FRIENDS because everyone else is going to Eve's party and I'm like grounded. Whatever.

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